This morning I took my 2 year old to a splash park. She wanted to do the spray gun, so I took her over to one and we waited behind a boy that was playing with it. His buddy was playing with the other one, and it was clear that they were monopolizing the guns. I said to him,"could my daughter play with the gun for a minute, it won't be long, and then you can have it right back."
He of course looked for his mom, and then (i guess when he realized that she wasn't watching), continued to play. I then repeated myself, and he didn't even look at me.
Of course he knows there is nothing I can do to him if he doesn't listen, so he didn't listen His friend got off the other gun at this point, but I just said, "we will just go use the empty one."
Is there anything I could have done differently in this situation? I mean, seriously, I am 38 and this little **** made me look powerless in front of my daughter. I want to be a good role model for her.
An older girl in our group (9) came crying to her mom after going to play with the guns, probably because of these boys. I mean, really, here are these 7 or 8 year olds spraying all the little 2 year olds and laughing?!?
What, if anything, could be done?
Just wanted to say, the kids had been playing on the guns for over 10 minutes. I wasn't expecting him to give up his turn, I was expecting him to share.
If you were really annoyed about it, you could probably have found his mom and asked her to intervene?
You didn't look powerless in front of your daughter. It's a public park and you aren't the official time keeper of how long everyone gets to play on the equipment. Yes it would have been nice for the older boys to let the little ones have a turn however at that age kids can be jerks. Next time ask and if the kid doesn't move say something to your daughter like "I guess his mommy didn't teach him to share very well" and move onto something else.
I would have walk up to him and looked him in the eye and said, "It's someone else's turn now. If you would not like to share, I will find the lifeguard."
If he still ignored me, I would have reported it, and had a staff member intervene. For the older kids spraying the little ones in the face and laughing I would be more bold, and tell them to stop it right now. And if they did not listen, I would have removed the gun from his hand and asked him where his mother was. Then I would tell her what he was doing.
I sound like a battle-axe, I know. But nothing makes me angrier than bullies! If my child acted that way, we would be leaving the park, and have serious trouble at home!
You did not look powerless at all. The child looked rude. I mean your going to run into rude, obnoxious children all the time. I do not give them the time of day. The other boy moved and your daughter got her turn. All you can do is show your child how to act when someone is talking to her. To be respectful to others. They have a mother.......she will have to deal with them for a long time. The one thing I would do is to make sure they do not spray the 2 year olds. That would be mad and told them in a very loud voice to KNOCK IT OFF!!! Good luck!
I think calling him a little **** says it all.
You may have have been outwardly polite about it, but what the child heard was - my kid wants to play here and I don't think she should have to wait, so get off now and you can play again when she's finished. He, by his silence, effectively said - I'm playing now, and your child can wait her turn.
And then you call him a name on a message board and ask for ways to make sure your child can be instantly gratified next time.
The first poster, Mikelle F., needs to learn that that isn't the best way to handle it. She is being a bully....just what you do not want to teach your little one. You asked nicely, he didn't comply.....come back later. It is a good example that not all people are nice.
Good luck next time!
I don't think that anything else could be done honestly. Unless there are posted rules at the splash park regarding time on the equipment, he was simply being a rude ****.
In that situation, I don't think he made you look powerless in front of your daughter, but it can be a teaching opportunity to being explaining to her that "good manners" in public places are to share, to respond to adults or kids who ask questions and to not monopolize the equipment.
Unfortunately, with 2 kids (2 and 4), we've learned that most people really don't want to do what's necessary to be parents. It seems a lot of parents are more worried about being liked by their kids than setting good examples. Because I love my children so much, I accept they'll detest me at times, but I'll give them a good foundation to become well-rounded adults. We're having an issue with a neighbor right now who's so self-absorbed, she has no ability to recognize that her son is a pain in the rear and unwelcome most of the time.
Even your grace in that situation was a good example for your daughter in asking if she could have a turn. She'll learn to respect other people's time on the equipment and to recongize when she needs to move on to let someone else have a turn.
Good luck.
I don't think you looked powerless to your daughter either. These boys are just bad, especially the one. It seems like the other one had some sense. However, there isn't anything you could do any better in my book.
Great time to teach patience and how to properly wait your turn. Did you really expected the boy to stop playing and having fun?? Really? And what did you expect the mom to do?? Heck I tell you I would have told you to wait your turn my kid is playing now.
I think there are 2 things here. Yes the boy was inconsiderate and rude. you could have used it as a teaching moment for your little one. (example: I hope when a grown up talks to you that you answer him/her) but also at splash country those water gun things are in the section for toddlers. if it was a 7 or 8 year old he was too old for that area. they very clearly have a sign marked for height and if your taller than this you can't play here. next time go get a worker to send the kid on his way. better luck next time
I would get on his eye level and firmly explain that the park is for the public and we take turns.
I wouldn't mean for him to let go right now, but let him know someone else was waiting to play that game.
My daughter is 15 now but when she was little and playing in the indoor places like McDonalds, etc I always watched her carefully. There was an instance when a couple of boys, a little older, trapped her and she couldn't get through. Boy did they think it was funny, they were laughing as was the so called mom who brought them that day.
I climbed in the scramble myself and told them to leave my child alone. I did not touch them but I scared the he$$ out of them with my look and tone of voice. When I came out, one of their moms (who couldn't get into the scramble) met me because she was watching them the entire time. I told her if she didn't teach those kids some manners and to not be bullies, they would have a rough road ahead. I added that if just 1 of them had touched my child in any way, that the police would be involved, I didn't care how young they were.
I do not tolerate bullies.
Not all people are taught manners. I would of either gone onto a different activity or decided to say something directly to the kid until he moved.
