Toddler Discipline - Winter Haven,FL

I have to laugh because he's 16 months old! So be prepared for this to continue for awhile....he's acting like a very typical baby his age. Testing his grounds while at the same time not having a complete grasp on language. There is really no reason to yell though....
My pediatrician started recommending time outs at 18 months old, my son however was not ready to grasp the concept of action and consequence yet: if you do this, then this will happen. So we practiced re-direction--if he grabbed something he shouldn't then he would get a firm "no" and then redirect him to something he could touch or play with. He's two now though and time outs work great now.
If your son, is ready to understand consequences-then implement time outs now. My pediatrician recommend using the pack n play for this and it has worked great for us (esp since at this age getting them to sit on a stool or step can be a feat in itself.)
Start with a warning: Right after the behavior-get eye level and directly tell them, if you do ______ again, then you will get a time out.
When they do it again like they are bound to do, get eye level again, and say "I told you not to _______, now you are going into time out." Calmly bring him to the time out area--which should be clear of any interactions--toys, TV, etc. and then walk away (this is where the PNP worked great).. A good rule of thumb is time outs should be in minutes as they are in age so at 16 months, 1-1.5 min should be fine. I even have an egg timer now by the PNP.

After the time is up, go back to him, state again at eye level why he went in time out, ask him if he's sorry, and give him a hug.

Rinse and repeat.

By doing this, I've gotten my toddler to stop walking on the couch, climbing on tables, touching the TV, etc. usually takes a couple of times in one day and maybe a few "refreshers" after that when he decides to test it again. Of course all kids have different temperments, so you may have to do it more or less than I do. They key things are remaining calm, talking at eye level to make sure they have your attention, and consistency...

Good luck!

I would suggest consistency. No matter what punishment you choose, you should stick with that punishment everytime. Personally, if my child were telling me no, I would say something simple and stern like, "Don't tell me no." Then I would put the child in time out. Same thing with grabbing an object or doing something he isn't suppose to. Say, "You can't do that." Then follow up with a punishment. At this age they are testing your boundaries and speaking from experience, if you don't start showing your boundaries now, they will walk all over you. The older they are, the tougher it gets to teach boundaries. Good luck!

Move the things you don't want him to mess with! Leaving things out is just to much for that age. Yes he may remember you said no but impluse control is still a ways away.

I don't think it is a point of breaking him. He just realizes that his action get a reaction. I agree with being consistant on your discipline, but that young just show them love.

At his age, they don't literally know right from wrong. They haven't fully grasped the concept of cause and effect. They don't understand that climbing on a chair may make it tip over and they will get hurt- even if it's happened already. They don't understand why they can't take a cup of water and dump it on the floor. I don't know what types of things he is doing, but the smile he gives you as he does it is not because he is being defiant, really-- it's because he ENJOYS whatever response he gets from doing it- like the yelling you say you are trying not to do. His job as a toddler is to explore the world and learn and discover cause and effect. He may not get that pulling on an electrical wire may cause him an electric shock, but he HAS learned that pulling on it makes mommy yell and come lunging toward him across the room-- which to him is quite amusing. Everyone has their own beliefs on how much to "child proof" a home. I personally feel you need to make sure your house is safe, but not wrapped in bubble wrap. I think children should be taught not to do/touch certain things, and even though they may not understand your exact words yet, you need to be sure to use more words than "no" because they will eventually start to understand. My son has a special cabinet in the kitchen where I keep tupperware-- I have bright, plastic chain links hanging from the handle. Any time he tries to open another cabinet, I close it, put my foot in the way so he can't open it again, and I tell him, "No, Oliver. This one is not your cabinet." Then I take him over to his and say, "This one is Oliver's cabinet." In the meantime, none of the other lower cabinets have anything dangerous in them (just in case he goes in them when I'm not in the room)-- but I don't want him to have free reign of the entire kitchen. I hope this helped.

My mom sent me some awesome CD's about disciplinging. It is called Love and Logic, and it is so cool. With really young children, when they do something you don't like, they say to say "Uh Oh" and pick the child up and put them in their room/crib. They will most likely throw a fit. Leave him in there until he stops crying. When you get him out just say "That was so sad. Let's not do that again".

The point is that when you yell, it starts the child's fight or flight response. They get defensive and aren't receptive to discipline. When you are gentle and compassionate, they learn a lot better. We have had a lot of success with this with my 2 year old daughter.

Once the kids get a bit older, they teach to make the punishment fit the crime. They want kids to think for themselves and pay the consequences for the specific actions that the child does. It's really good stuff.

Hope this helps!
T.