Time for Potty Training

Hi D.,

it sounds like she's almost ready. You have to see signs of readiness before assuming she is. Since she doesn't want to wear a diaper or underwear, that is one sign. Another one is if she's able to stay dry for a couple of hours like during a nap. If she expresses interest in becoming like mommy, then she'll imitate you. Even if she's not ready to sit on the potty, have her get used to being around it...at least she puts her dolls on it. Show her how the dolls can go potty too.

Just remember not to pressure her into potty training. When she's ready she'll show you more signs. I have friends that place the potty chair in front of the TV, while her kids sat on the potty and watched cartoons. Since this is summertime now, she'll want to keep her diapers and underwear off...it would've been the perfect time to start, but don't force her.

I have a DVD I'd like to suggest. It's called, "Potty Power for boys and girls." It's such a neat DVD. My son loved every minute of it and it shows not only how to go potty, but hygiene as well. I borrowed it from my local library. You can also purchase it online too.

I think its a great time to start! Just make it exciting and fun. Don't get upset because at this age there will be lots of accidents. I disagree with forcing a diaper on your child if she doesn't want it. Babies at 18 months do not have the mental capacity to 'manipulate'. Most babies, even young babies don't like to sit in their mess. Even babies can learn to use the potty- check out this site; http://www.natural-wisdom.com/

Now that its summer, I would let her run around naked in your backyard and take the potty outside with you. When she pees down her legs, say- 'that's pee pee! Pee pee goes in the potty!' And then just pick her up and sit her down on the potty chair- even if she gets right up and sits on it for one second give her praise and just keep putting her on the potty after each time she goes, and she will make that connection. This is what I do with my 16 month old. I like the idea of sitting her on her potty while watching tv, and I also read my baby a book while she's on the potty. Good luck! She may not have physical control yet, but you can defenitely start making those connections- it takes a while.

Hi- 18 months is still pretty young to have all the skills needed for potty training. Sounds like the not wanting to wear a diaper is a control issue on your daughter's part....very typical at this age. They don't want to lay still long enough for us to change their pants. Both my boys (6.5 yrs & 2 yrs) did the same thing at his age. Peeing & pooping is the one area where kids have the most control & if you come on too strong w/the potty training, it could backfire on you. So, buy the potty & encourage her interest but don't give up the diapers yet. Good luck!

The following are signs of REAL toilet training readiness (most 18 month old children are not ready for potty training yet):

Physical signs
Is coordinated enough to walk, and even run, steadily.

Urinates a fair amount at one time.

Has regular, well-formed bowel movements at relatively predictable times.

Has "dry" periods of at least three or four hours, which shows that his bladder muscles are developed enough to hold urine.

Behavioral signs
Can sit down quietly in one position for two to five minutes.

Can pull his pants up and down.

Dislikes the feeling of wearing a wet or dirty diaper.

Shows interest in others' bathroom habits (wants to watch you go to the bathroom or wear underwear.

Gives a physical or verbal sign when he's having a bowel movement such as grunting, squatting, or telling you.

Demonstrates a desire for independence.

Takes pride in his accomplishments.

Isn't resistant to learning to use the toilet.

Is in a generally cooperative stage, not a negative or contrary one.

Cognitive signs
Can follow simple instructions, such as "go get the toy."

Understands the value of putting things where they belong.

Has words for urine and stool.

Understands the physical signals that mean he has to go and can tell you before it happens or even hold it until he has time to get to the potty.

Your child does not need to have ALL of these signs, but a great many of them - hence the reason why most 18 month olds are not ready for toilet training. It sounds like your daughter is engaging in a very typical, 18 month old behavior: testing the limits. She doesn't want to wear the diaper, throws a tantrum, and then do you exactly what she wants you to do: give in and let her do whatever she wants. She is now in control of the situation, and she knows exactly how to manipulate you. If she throws a fit, just put the diaper on her anyway - I have an 18 month daughter as well, adn fighting the diaper is just one of those limit testing things that she tries every now and then. I just let her have her fit, tell her that she is going to get a clean diaper wether she likes it or not, and put that diaper on her. And while she is a very smart child, using three and four word sentences, she is not yet behaviorally ready to potty train.

I started my daughter at 18 months too. She's got the idea it sounds like. Keep talking about it in a positive manner. It might help to show some positive excitement when she put her dolls on it. Soon she'll want to take the dolls place. It took just about a year for us to get to the point that I could take her out and put her to bed without worry of accidents.

Dear D.

No, it is not time to potty train, and yes, it is normal for a 18 month old to do just what she is doing. My great grandson did that very same thing. His sister did similarly, but he was just the worst. We don't know what made him struggle struggle with diaper changes, baths, hair washing, putting on clothes - all that sort of thing.

He was so sweet and darling and fun the rest of the time. He screamed when he had to get out of the car seat and had a tantrum on the parking lot in front of the church when he was that age. Then, we just picked him up and carried him screaming into the church. An usher ran out and asked if he could help and would it be o.k. to give him a cookie - YES, we said. He gave him a cookie - screaming over, and the rest of the time he was here he loved going to church. He ran in ahead of us and shook hand with everyone and went back to his class without a word. I don't know, but kids do stuff like that. Just different personalities - and so on. He is almost three now and we barely got him potty trained. He just wanted to be a baby for longer, I guess. C. N.

Hi D.,
I have a 25 month old daughter who too is going through her potty training experience and I know she is not ready. She has her portable potty, a potty cushion with step stool and two potty stories with sound effects and stickers which she loves and want either book read to her everyday, but when it comes time for her to sit in the potty she thinks it's a game. Since she will not sit on the potty for more than a minute at a time without wanting to get up right away or begins struggling to get up, that is a clear sign that she is not ready. She shows interest when I go to the bathroom and lets me know what I'm doing, "pee pee" or "po po" and I'll say yes and let her sit in her potty seat with or with out a diaper, she also gets to flush the toilet which she loves and say bye bye pee pee or po po, but till this day she has not, herself gone to the bathroom and had first hand experience.
In the mean time we will continue to leave the bathroom door open when we have to go and let her sit in with us if she wishes untill she is ready.
My suggestion with the doll is to allow your daughter see you teach the doll how to go potty and maybe place apple juice and/or peanut butter in the bowl with out your daughter seeing you so that she can feel safe. If you have stickers, give the doll a sticker after you make belive your cleaning her bottom and washing her hands. Just make a big deal about it and hopefully this will help.