Teen Tattoo Party

I read this and really don't know what to say. I just asked my 15 year old about this and it sounds like he is aware of these parties too. I would think that if you can find out who did this you could file a police report and file a complaint with the liscensing department (state) for tatoo artists. If you can find out who it was your possibilities would range from criminal charges to civil charges and suite.
Not so sure on punishment of your daughter. Sounds like she already has rebel tendancies and believes she is an adult. Maybe it is time to start treating her like an adult. Stop doing anything for her other than providing a roof over her head. She wants a car, pay for it herself, clothes, pay for it herself. You get what I mean, other than a roof and food in the fridge, provide nothing. No laundry service or chauffer service. Heck, charge her rent. If she thinks she can make adult decisions she needs to know what being an adult means. It might open her eyes. I was this awful child that did everything she wanted to. It was difficult to punish me, these are things that would have and did make a difference.
I wish you luck!

I feel your pain. I was informed by my 27 year old that my 15 year old had her navel pierced. When I asked her about it she lied several times about who pierced it for her, because I was going to have him/her arrested. She finally said she did it herself, I believe she she did do it because the way it looked. I made her take it out, took her cell phone until it closed up and get completely well. I alo took her allowance away for a month.
I hope you are doing well with your health. Brest cancer runs rapid in my family and I have experienced lots of family crisis.

I am sorry to hear you battaling breast cancer and will pray for you.

Gosh- teenagers. where were her friends parents? All I can say is stay involved as much as possible. when my daughter was 17 (now 19). it was the worse time ever. we are just starting to repair our relationship. when she ran away all I thought was I dont know any of her friends- even though they were at our home all of the time. I didnt know there names, where they lived, nothing. I wished I had done more- instead i was annoyed at her all the time- and it showed. It took awhile to step back and realize- I am not in control. it is so hard to let that go. now I do not agree or like tattoos and my daughter has one. I am just glad its hidden on her hip. perhaps you can have her get her yearly physcial and ask her dr to talk to her about the dangers. or if you know someone she will listen to. If your daughter is anything like mine she will not listen to anything you say. let your daughter know when she is an adult and out of your home she can then make those adult decisions of a tattoo. as far as punishment- the crime is done. I wouldnt punish- just find out where your daughter is at all times and talk to the parents of whoevers house she is going to. Good luck.

T., I surly would contact your local police dept and report this as she was under age at the time and hiv can take up to afew years to recognise. I hope this helps and my prayers are with you D.

Hello, My brother is a Tattoo artist and he does do house parties but.....they have to be at least 18 years old or have a parent with them if they are under 18 yrs.old.and he always,always,always uses brand new sterile needles and tubes and he always,always wears gloves. I would definatley make it known to your daughter(if you haven't already) the hazards of not using clean and sterile tools and that is what you are most upset about, because you love her and would be beyond yourself if she were to get a horrible disease like HIV from an uneducated decison. The person who did this is obviously very irresponsible. You should find out where she had this done and talk to the parents, let them know you wished they would have contacted you to make sure this was o.k before they let this happen in their house or they may not even have known it took place if they were'nt home. As for the person who did it, if you find out who it is you could sue them as it is illegal to give a tattoo to a minor with out parental permission. You did take the right actions as to have her checked by a Dr. for infections and so forth. As for punishment hmmm....well it's done and over unless you have it removed I would say again make her very aware of the health issues and a good grounding maybe like 2 weeks; nothing but work(if she works), school, family partys(if there are any), no computer, phone,car(except for work,or depending how much you trust her maybe drive her and pick her up yourself) ect. possliby adjust as the time goes on for good behavior/attitude ie. let her have the phone, car and/or computer back after like a week or so. Be strong but not over bearing, like another mother said you will have drug,drinking and sex issues soon(if not already) and you don't want to cut the communication, you just want her to know you love her and are concerned for her health, but there has to be a consequence for her actions. I haven't reached the teenage years yet, but they are coming up quickly. Good luck to you with all your battles, your health is #1 right now so take care of yourself so you can take care of your family. You'll be in my prayers.

Hi T.,
Ironically enough I'm a tattoo artist and at times we do do house parties. We have a strict policy of carding everyone getting a tattoo, we copy the drivers licenses on the back of releases and always set up for a tatto in front of the client. We do not tattoo anyone under the age of 18. Period.

To help ease your mind I would ask your daughter if the artist opened up needles from a steril pack, did the artist take the tubes from a steril pack, was the artist wearing gloves? Was it a kid with a home made machine or was it a "professional" artist. Although a professional would NOT tattoo anyone under the age of 18.

This sort of thing is infuritating for professional artists who strive to give excellent work. There are many times we perform cover-ups from these tattoo artists that have not taken the time to do a formal apprenticeship.

I'm sorry that your going through this and do understand the anger and pain your going through.

If you have any further questions feel free to ask...
M.

Oh my God. I am so angry for you. I'm not sure what you should do. I'd definately call the parents and maybe even the school so they can send a note out letting other parents know that this type of thing is going on. To be honest, I'd email a news station. They like to look into these things and if it airs, other parents would know about this. My kids are still young (10 and 7) but I had never even heard of this and I am a teacher. I think it's painful and expensive but I'd look into getting your daughter's tatoo removed. I'm not against tatoos per say but if your'e going to get it, then it should be when your'e old enough to realize the consequences of it not just because your girlfriends are doing it. Please let us know what you do!!!

I only have kids 10 and under but thank you very much for informing me of yet another secret teen occurance. I've never heard of tatoo parties but now that I have I'll be sure to discuss this with my soon-to-be teenagers. What will they come up with next?

If it happened at friends house the parents could be responsible. Not that they did the tattoo but that they should have been aware of what is going on but the only thing you could do is sue them, to pay for your daughter having it removed. You could possibly have a police report made because she is a minor but this would probably cause a lot of problems at home because of peer pressure.

This is touchy situation and punishment is going to be hard and is really between you and your husband. If it was me a would have it taken off but that can be expensive, see if your insurance will pay for it.

Good Luck

Dear T.,

Respond. Don't react! Your health is important! You took the right course to make sure your daughter doesn't have an infection/illness. The branding is done. Step back. Pick your battles. Talk to her about the next step that 17 year olds can take, like drugs, drinking, sex, etc....open that line of communication. YOU have a health battle. Tell her your major concerns and how you feel. She may feel stupid that she did it. C'mon, it's doubtful that a parent was involved. These kids are so coy. She needs you. Don't think that a 17 year old needs you less than a 5 years old! Don't go out of your mind! My heart goes out to you!

T.,
First and foremost don't let this stress affect your health. This generation looks at tatoos differently than we did/do. My daughters both have tatoos but my son does not. They are in places that can't be seen and your daughter's must be too since she hide it from you for a year. It's done and over--you have now educated her about having a professional do that type of work. Anyone who goes to a private home and works on teens is not a professional! Hopefully, she see this now. You are in my prayers for good health and little to no stress. Hang in there...17 year old daughters turn into 20-21 year old young women with much more sensitivity to their mothers. Been there and done that twice! :-)
C.

I would contact DCFS--she is a minor! I have to wonder if parental consent is needed? If nothing else, it may help raise awareness...

I would have her research all the risks and write a report on her findings then present to you and share the info with her friends...

Take care of yourself!

T.,

I am sorry that I can't help with your question as my children are all young but I do have teen age sister and one of them did go out and get a tatoo across her back last year. It was an Eagle holding the breast cancer ribbon. She did it to be supportive of my mom who is a survivor but my mom was not happy at all. I feel for your situation as we felt the same frustrations. These kids don't understand the dangers. I did see that you are battleing breast cancer right now. How are you doing? My mother just fought it off this past year. I will keep you in my thought as you continue in your battle. Stay strong. You defeated it once you most definitely can do it again.

Sincerely,
S.

Hi T.,

I myself got my first tattoo at 17. I'm now 28 and still loving them. I was able to get a tattoo underage because I knew of a shop in the city that didn't card. My mother was furious when I got it. She was worried about disease as well. I think tattoo parties not only pose the risk of disease but the workmanship at these parties are usually not up to par. The reason teens go to them though is because they can get away with being underage. Personally I don't think you should punish your child. There are worse things your child could indulge in such as drugs, alcohol, and sex. I will warn you that tattoos are addictive. The chances are high that she may try to get another one. I had five before the age of 21 but I made sure to go to well-known shops and I always watch them take out new/sterilized equipment before being inked to this day I still love everyone of them and actually am going this week to get another one. I think what is more important than punishing her is to inform her. Although I have never had a problem getting a job it does make what you wear more difficult. I have tattoos down my arms and when its 90 degrees out I have to wear long sleeves. At this age it will be very difficult to keep her from getting them so if you are willing to support her if she does decide to get another one then she can at least go to a safe environment were the workmanship is high. I have a four month old at home but both me and my husband (who is also tattooed) can't wait for the day to go get tattooed as a family - if our son decides he wants one. Again I think tattoos are a beautiful form of art - it's just a different way to display them.