Stuck on Choosing My Wedding Date ( Need Advice )

Updated on October 20, 2010
M.T. asks from Allen, TX
24 answers

Hello Ladies,

Upon looking at vendors and talking with friends and family I am stuck on two different dates as to when I will get married. I am asking you fellow mommies for your UN biased opinion for wedding dates since I am personally having a hard time picking.

The dates we are debating:
======================
April 10th 2011 ( 4-10-11) VS November 11, 2011 ( 11,11,11)

So here is a couple of things that weigh into this factor of choosing a date:

11/11/2011

I have a beautiful little girl who is not my Fiance biological daughter. However he wants to adopt my little girl and give her his last name. She is now 4 years old and will be starting Kindergarten in August 2011 ( WHICH IS BEFORE OUR 11.11.11. DATE ) So she would still have my last name.

Another deal with 11.11.11 is that his brother is getting married October 1st and although they said they don't mind if we get married right after them in November it still feels slightly awkward. Someone also said that the 11.11.11 is going to be used widely and takes away from the specialness of having your own unique day. They are stating that it would be CLIQUE.

04/10/2011

Upon discussing the dates and trying to decide a date my friend told me of a fun and exciting way that you can create a special wedding date by adding your birthdays together.

My birthday is 05/29 =34 His Birthday is 02/04 = 6 Together that is 40.

That makes the date could be 4/1/2011, 4/10/2011, 4/30/11 ( which 4/30 is out )

I thought this was super cute and creative. We really like 4/10/11

Getting married in April would eliminate the problem with the name change and all that fun stuff. I just am afraid of rain or it being hot. I am not a fan of hot weather. We both like the cooler seasons.

May isn't an option because that’s mine and my daughters birthday month and I am not a huge fan of summer so May – September is out.I just really wanted my fellow mommies opinion on dates to get married. I know no one can choose my date but me but its always nice to have others advice ;)

Thanks in advance

Merissa

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

C.F.

answers from Boston on

I would put both dates on a piece of paper in a hat and Pick one ! Which ever one you choose- was meant to be :-) GL congratulations

1 mom found this helpful

A.B.

answers from Dallas on

I had a beautiful outdoor April wedding in 2008 and my friend had an April wedding this year with great weather! So, I'm partial to April! Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.B.

answers from Wichita on

I wanted to get married on Halloween, but we had to move it up. (the friend who introduced us was going to africa for the peace corps) so we picked a random wed and got married in Vegas. Best thing we could have done. No headache.

It's the marriage that matters. Everything else is cake.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.B.

answers from Dallas on

Another thing to consider, is the proximity to holidays. A lot of people take time off for Thanksgiving and Christmas. You might run into problems, with people not being able to take additional time off for your wedding (should anyone need to), if they already have holiday plans. The November date is pretty close to Thanksgiving.

3 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I'd say April. If you are planning on having him adopt your daughter, and her take his last name, all of that will require some time to get the paperwork completed. I'm assuming that you want her name on all her school records (and amongst her friends at school) to be the same and not change after school gets going.

Also, I just don't see the point in waiting any longer. It sounds like you have been together for awhile, so why delay for a "catchy" date? If you can get the details worked out, the sooner the better!

Here's another "reason" you may not have thought of... if you pick an early enough date in April, it could be Spring Break. And when you get ready to celebrate your anniversary(ies) in years to come, it might be easier to plan if your daughter is out of school, rather that trying to get someone to come stay with her so you can go away overnight somewhere.

Regardless, of what date you decide upon.... Congratulations!

2 moms found this helpful

T.M.

answers from Bakersfield on

Good grief! I would get on a plane and elope in Vegas this wknd ;)

2 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Houston on

When I planned my wedding, I went with my favorite season... fall. Which is the best season in Texas as I was trying to avoid sweaty humid pictures in this sticky Texas heat.

Think about the weather, the flowers you love and will the be in season at that time of year, will the ceremonies be crowded and rushed... 11/11/11 might be crazy and you may have to pay a lot more for flowers/reception hall/cake and such due to supply and demand.

I vote for April :) It isn't too hot or too rainy in Texas in April, and it is a little more green than it would be in November. Also, remember a lot of people save their time off in November for traveling during Thanksgiving, so many may not be able to travel if they just came down for the Oct wedding, and then will be traveling again at Thanksgiving. Just something to think about.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I say April... it gives family more time between weddings and I also agree the 11-11-11 will be used by a TON of people...

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I say go for the date that will have the most meaning. Chances are that no matter what date you pick you future husband will have difficulty remembering the date (unassisted) regardless of what you choose. My anniversary is in November but it is not really a significant date as we just picked it because it worked with our schedules. My husband and I celebrate each year on the anniversary of our first date (August), that has more meaning to us. I agree that the 11/11/11 will be a sought after date but choosing a date in April will likely take care of the name change issue that you face. What ever you choose just remember you will have to remind him when the anniversary is approaching, LOL.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Wow! If you put as much energy into your marriage as you do picking a date you'll be happily married forever! LOL

Personally, I'd go with April 10th.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

I would depend it on the honeymoon. where are you going. if its going to be cold in the winter where you honey moon this is a 2 sided sword. to cold to do any outside activities but plenty of cuddle time best in the winter. spring is neither hot or cold warm in the day cool at night. so activies outside would be ok and cool enough for cuddle at night. I vote spring. what about april fools day if both of you have a good enough sense of humor.:) when is leap year? I think its this year and you could have a leap day wedding. an anniversary once every 4 yrs. :) I have a sense of humor so these would appeal to us. but realistic we will probably get married in december and honeymoon is going to be nfr in vegas. YEAH MY TYPE OF HONEYMOON. ;0

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from Boston on

I got married in November and I loved it, but I don't think that would be the right choice for you. Aside from the weather, everything about the April date looks right. It might be warm, but probably not roasting. And just pick someplace inside with air conditioning and it won't matter, really. Congratulations!

K.N.

answers from Austin on

November 11th is Veterans Day. It's a Federal holiday and usually a highly patriotic day. I myself would not want to get married on Veterans Day.

I think an April wedding in Texas would be beautiful. Spring weather--although you're right, there's a chance it might rain... So choose a venue that can do both an inside or outside wedding. Also, make sure you know when daylight savings will occur... I'm not sure when it is in 2011 but you don't want to get married on the day that the clocks change (with guests risking not remembering to change their clocks).

Good Luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.M.

answers from Dallas on

I say go for April. I live in Rockwall - it isn't hot in April but rain is very likely. Saying that, I like the cooler months as well and November is my favorite month for weather. It's really is a toss up I guess. Depending on your venue or any other service you may need, if you need to reserve anything - call and see which date is available.

Also, don't worry about the cliche of 11/11/11 - it will still be your own unique day.

Congratulations!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.P.

answers from New York on

Don't overthink this decision. You live in Texas the weather could vary significantly in either month.

The adoption process is fairly complicated and long, so I wouldn't count on your daughter's name being changed before the start of the school year if you are married in April! There is extensive paperwork involved as well as the need for a social worker to work with your family and recommend/support the adoption. My neice went through this process several years ago and LOTS of things can come up during the process of adoption. It's not as simple as "he's my husband and wants to be her dad". I was actually quite surprised by the complexity.

Meet with the school faculty before school and explain that your husband is in the process of adopting your daughter and her last name will change mid-year. Most teachers I have worked with will allow the child to start using the "new name" from the first day (learning to write their name) if they know ahead of time. Legally (report cards, registration, etc) her name will not change, but it's really no different than having a child go by his middle name!

If all other things are fairly, equal... think of your photos! If you like "spring colors"- bright and vibrant, go with April. If you like "earthtones"- subtle and rich, go with November. Keep in mind what your bridal party will wear, flowers, foods, venue, etc.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.Y.

answers from New York on

I'd pick April if you can get it all organized in time. Do you have a venue in mind? Check the available dates. I got engaged on Halloween and still had to scramble in some respects for a June wedding. It was a beautiful day but hot for formal wear outdoors.

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

11/11/11 is going to be very popular for a wedding date so I would pick a different date. I wouldn't want friends/family trying to decide if they want to attend my wedding or another one on that same date. Also, the adoption should have nothing to do with the wedding. Congrats and good luck deciding!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

April
that would... be good for you/Fiance AND your daughter.. whom he wants to adopt... and before she starts school. The main point to me.. is YOUR nuclear family... and getting married together... with it being special for your daughter as well.

rain in April or it being hot? Well who knows... so plan it for indoors.

L.M.

answers from Dover on

I would go w/ April. I don't like the colder seasons and around her November is too chilly for me plus there is hunting season around her and we can't interfere with that.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would go with the April date. It sounds like the only reason to get married in November is because of the trendy sounding date, even though everything else about it as actually something of an inconvenience for you.

If you're worried about weather, look at an almanac and track how the weather has been on each date for the last 10, 20 or 50 years. It should give you a good idea of what to expect.

I would not want to be married on a federal holiday. Travel will be more expensive that weekend, making it harder for out of town guests to attend the wedding AND making it more expensive if you ever want to go on vacation for your anniversary.

K.
http://www.discoverytoyslink.com/karenchao - got kids? I've got toys! Make your holiday shopping easy by choosing Discovery Toys.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.L.

answers from Cleveland on

If you think you can pull it off by April, since to me it sounds like you prefer April (but may not realize it, lol), I say go for it!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I would marry in April. If you get married in November and you celebrate Christmas in December; money might be tight and that will make planning anniversaries and presents harder.

Congratulations either way!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.S.

answers from Goldsboro on

I vote for April.
11/11/11 is going to be overused, just like 10/10/10 was.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.O.

answers from Dallas on

april for sure! you definitely sound more excited about that one. and april in texas shouldn't be too bad! congrats and have fun

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions