Stop Hitting

My daughter is nearly 21 months and she to was hitting and slapping myself and my husband as well as others...i asked her doctor what causes her to do this and he said its a form of GETTING ATTENTION....and as i was thinking about it i agreed with him...everytime she hit or slapped someone we would immediatly go over and "PAY ATTENTION" to her by telling her NO! I followed his advice of telling her in a calm but stern voice "We dont hit" and walking away, or redirecting her attention to her things...she stopped hitting within a week! I hope that helps you all! and hang in there if delt with correctly it does go away.! Good luck

I agree that it is to get attention. Look at the times when she tries to hit you and see if it is a time when your attention is elsewhere. See if you can find little ways to incorporate your daughter into things you are doing so that she feels involved. Or perhaps she is bored and needs something to help focus her attention, like coloring. My daughter, now 19 mo, went through the same thing and we found that it was mainly when she wanted more attention. We got those big crayons and when she may not be able to have all of my attention I'll sit her down with a crayon and piece of paper to color.
Good luck!

With my son I've been telling him no and then distracting him. Paying too much attention to it reiterates the negative behavior.

I really do not have any advice, but I have a major problem with my 27 month old son hitting at us. Unfortunately, I believe that I may have started that when we began disciplining him with a tap on the hand and/or arm. I think that he had and still does have this mindset that if you can hit me why can't I hit you. We tried to switch over to time out which did not work at all but now we have switched over to the belt, which he thinks twice about before hitting (without it he ignores you). I wish I had some help trying to nip this type of behavior in the bud because it is quite awful and don't tell him not to do something, he will run up to you or someone else and try to hit you. He will also try to slap you in the face. He has done that to my mother several times. He did that to me one time, but I nipped that in the bud at least I thought. Months later he did it again. One time he got so bad it was like he was literally trying to fight you for whatever reason. Anyone have any suggestions dealing with this type of behavior? I would like to hear anything.

I have 2 year old boy/girl twins. They began to hit one another at around 13 months. I started putting them in time out for one minute each time. It did not take but a few times and they stopped doing it. Every now and again they will hit their older sister, whom is seven, and I send them to time out for 2 minutes, now. I hope you can give it a whirl. It might just work. I put mine in a corner where there were no toys or distractions. I always tell them to think about what they have done. Then I have them apologize to one another or give XOXO's to one another. Whatever is more age appropriate.

Good luck,
H.

If hitting is a game to her then just ignoring her will stop it eventually. She is looking for a response from you. Even saying ouch can be funny to a 14 month old.

Your daughter sounds beautiful!!! What I would try is to (in a gentle way)everytime she hits, act like you are disapointed in her, that way she will get used to a bad responce when she does that so... she will stop doing it. also she is just trying to get attention, which is somethings kids do all the time, so just ignore it and act as if nothing happened,so.. the child will get bored of doing something forno response...and she will stop doing it. Remember this could just be a phase

My daughter is 14 months old and does the same thing! She thinks it's funny. She will slap you and then smile and laugh. I agree that saying "ouch" is also funny to her, so that doesn't help. Even if I grab her hand and tell her no, she still thinks it's funny! We may have to try the time out or something to get her to stop. Sometimes I will pick her up and sit her down a little further away from me, which almost always upsets her. It doesn't hurt her, I just scoot her away from me a bit. Maybe that will work.

Good luck with your daughter too! Let us know if you find something that works!

Hi, R.,

About me: I am a stay-home mom to two amazing, bright, strong-willed little people. My daughter is 5 and my son is 2 1/2 yrs. I'm a Christian, educated, middle-class, loving mom in my early 40s. I adore my husband of 15 years. My children are the light of my life. That's my story.

About yours: Sydney probably does consider this a form of play or simply a means to get your attention. My son went through a stage of hitting. EVERY time, we said "NO! We do not hit in this family." EVERY SINGLE TIME. Children respond to consistency. If YOU are patient and consistent, she will stop.

Fact: children will MODEL THE BEHAVIOR OF THEIR PARENTS. We do not hit. Not ever. I try to remember to treat my children as I would want to be treated. I sure don't want anyone hitting me or screaming at me.

Time-out can be effective, but it's not an easy fix. You have to use it again, and again, and again, and again, and ... eventually it works. Consistency and routine are the keys.

God bless you and your miracle baby!

p.s. I taught both my kids to sign, starting at around 9-10 months. It is SO easy and it can make a world of difference for you and your little one! Much behavior at that age results from frustration in wanting to communicate with you. Get the book "Sign with your Baby" by Joseph Garcia. I promise you will be amazed by the results of teaching even just two little words: "eat" and "milk." Try it.

R.,
You are not alone. My 22 mo son started doing that at about 20 mo. Fortunately (or unfortunately) he tends to only do it to me. My little man loves giving hugs and kisses, just this week, I've started gently grabbing his wrist mid-swing and saying mommy wants hugs, not hits.
I think it's just a stage, since we can't understand what they are trying to tell us, this is a way to gain our attention.
Good luck! If you find another trick that works, let us know!!