Started Potty Training Today--a New Problem!

Updated on September 20, 2008
S.L. asks from Boise, ID
11 answers

My son is 28 months old. I started sort of a potty-training-in-one-day approach today. He did really well, and went potty about 10 times today. He did have a few accidents after his nap, but all morning there were none! And he is totally self-reliant. He's been sneaking into the bathroom peeing, dumping the pot into the toilet, and then I find out when he flushes. Then he puts the pot back and comes out to announce, "I did it!" But each time I've gone in with him, he has just a tiny bit of urine in it, barely enough to cover the bottom. In fact, most times, I have to lean it to one side to make sure it's yellow and not just water left over from rinsing it. But then at dinner, he just about flooded the kitchen when he peed on his booster seat.
What I don't get is why he pees about a tablespoon in the potty seat, but WAY more when he has an accident?
The first time my older son went potty, he practically filled up the pot. I knew from feeling his diapers that he was holding it, because he'd be dry for hours, then suddenly leaking. I haven't noticed that with son #2.
Any advice?

_____________________
I guess I don't understand why so many people think he's not ready. He didn't have an accident for 4 hours and used the potty 10 times! Sure, it's different from my first son's experience, but what isn't? My first son was younger than this when he wanted to be potty trained (and believe me, with a 2 month old baby, I didn't want to do it! But he did). And our pediatrician told me months ago that he should start potty training because "he's smart enough." I think he's proven that.
I agree that potty training in a day isn't likely to happen. I just liked the idea of an intensive day to kick off the training. What I'm doing is giving him lots to drink, and setting the kitchen timer for 20 minutes. I take him to sit on the potty seat when it rings. He gets a sticker for trying. If he ends up with something in the pot, he gets a dried strawberry and a sticker. The timer seems to not be doing anything, because he's going all by himself without a reminder from me.
I think maybe what's going on is that he likes the attention and stickers, and that's why he's going all the time.
Thanks for the advice to make a big deal about how much is in the potty. That just might work!

2 moms found this helpful

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J.J.

answers from Pocatello on

My son did this same thing when he was first starting to potty train. He would get lots of praise when he went. I think he loved my reaction so he'd go as often as he could squeeze it out just to see mom do the "Potty Dance" heeheehee!

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C.H.

answers from Denver on

I'm sorry , S., but he's not ready. A parent can't arbitrarily decide that it's time for a child to go potty. The child needs to be both physically and psychologically ready. Please let him just be a little toddler for a while.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Denver on

** Intelligence has nothing to do with potty training. It is bodily control and awareness. Showing an interest and actually being able to be potty trained are very seperate things. Encouraging him is great, you stressing him and yourself is not. Do not worry about it, let it happen as it should!!!! I just think at his age let him go at his own pace.

I do not believe in potty training for a day, nor do I believe that doing potty training too early benefits anyone. I totally agree with Crista, let him be and see what happens without pressure.
It is great at his age he is showing interest, he does not have the body capabilities of being fully aware of when the urge hits, how to hold it and so on. Therefore he cannot be "potty trained" until those things are done. He needs time and patience. Boys especially take longer and expecting him to know this stuff in 24 hours is really nonsense.
Just relax, take it a day at a time, do not allow him access to his potty alone so there is not a mess and I certainly wouldn't let a 2 year old alone in a bathroom anyway, it isn't safe!!
You are setting yourself up for more stress with too high of expectations. There is no such thing as them potty training in one day, just isn't. There will be regression and stress if you put too much on him.
The things that have to be present are knowing what the urge is, waking dry, able to pull pants and down, ablility to hold it for longer periods until he is in a bathroom, does not sound like he is there yet!

1 mom found this helpful

E.B.

answers from Fort Collins on

Congratulations! That is great progress. Sounds to me like he is just noticing how different is feels to go potty without a diaper or pants on. There will always be set backs, but just keep cheering him on and he will do fine. We used a small potty in the play room so he did not really have to leave what he was doing to go potty, but he was allowed to use the big potty whenever he wanted too as well. I would also continue to encourage him to help clean up.

- I do not agree with anyone that says that a 2 year old is too young to potty train. I am the proud mama of a 3 year old boy that has been potty trained since he was 16 months old. : )

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D.W.

answers from Boise on

It sounds like he likes the praise he is getting for the amount of times he goes pee. Tell him he has to go more next time. I would also tell him it doesn't count unless you go with him so you can make sure he does the whole ritual -- wipe, flush, wash hands. Have him drink a lot at one time and he shouldn't be able to hold it longer than an hour. It takes a little time for them to figure out how to hold it completely and for longer periods of time. This is a personal decision, but I am also one that believes in teaching little boys to sit down and go pee. I can't deal with the mess. When they get older and tall enough to pee like other boys do (like in time for Kindergarten) you can teach them the other way. Best wishes, D.

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J.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

It sounds like he's doing amazingly well! Every kids is ready at their own time, so age has very little to do with it. Just make sure you pay attention to his cues.
It sounds like he hasn't learn to completely void yet. Not a big surprise after just one day. He can let little bit out but may not know that there is more in his bladder or may not know how to let it all out. It's normal, really, he just needs to figure it out.
I would gradually tone down the praise. It sounds like he's very praise-oriented and you want him to go potty even when there isn't any praise. Since he's pretty well going on his own, I would phase out the stickers, but keep telling him what a good job he's doing.
Good luck! Keep going!

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J.H.

answers from Billings on

My daughter got marshmellows when she was training, and since we didn't give her things like that normally, she was constantly trying to go pee to get a marshmellow. She did a lot of little dribbles, like your son. I think the allure of the treat is very strong for some kids, and if they only have a teaspoon in their bladder, they will let it out in order to get the treat! Good luck--it sounds like your little guy is training pretty well so far.

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S.M.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Hi S.,
It sounds like he may want to go in the real potty. I would get a safe step for him to stand on and let him go in the toilet so he can flush. Throw in a couple of cheerios or fish crackers for a target, little boys love that.
Good luck,
SarahMM

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L.B.

answers from Denver on

To me, it sounds like he wants to have lots of successful tries. Ten times is quite a lot! Maybe try to encourage him to pee a lot by making a big deal out of how much is in the potty. He's able to control things enough to stop after just going a little but by not emptying his bladder each time he gets to a point where there's just too much pressure in his bladder and he has an accident. With my boys, we didn't use a little potty but had them straddle the toilet facing the tank so they could just lean forward and learn to aim. I drew targets on a square of toilet paper and floated them on the water for them to aim at.

L.

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J.F.

answers from Billings on

Also try just giving him time. It's great that he's doing so well in so little time, but remember that no two kids are exactly alike. While he's able to push some out in the potty, that doesn't mean that he has mastered total control over his body yet. Holding urine in and pushing it out, while each action feels different to adults, are new control concepts for your little guy, and the pressure exerted for each can be a bit confusing for little ones. He needs time to completely figure out how to hold in and release, which are voluntary actions, as opposed to accidents which are involuntary. Good luck! It sounds like you have a very sweet and intelligent little boy!

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A.S.

answers from Denver on

My son has used the toilet a handful of times. He's even pooped in it once. Its is called potty training because he's experimenting with it, trying it out, learning in increments. We don't train for a marathon in a single day or a century ride in a day. We go a little, see how our body does, build it up, get it used to the endurance and then *eventually* we run a marathon. We don't do it overnight. Why should a two year old be expected to do something overnight? Give him some time, let him learn to control his own body on his time schedule.

I'll echo Krista and Deb by saying letting him take the lead on going if fine, forcing the issue will get you into frustration-ville and not much further. And giving him tons of attention for something that you want to do on his own will get a child that demands treats and rewards for doing something that is just expected. GL.

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