Slow Poke

You are lucky to live in MI. When we were in Illinois I put mine in his underwear outside with his clothes. He could come in when he was dressed. Yeah, it was really cold,I started in January, but the dilly dally stopped and all he had to do was tell the others what I did in Illinois in the snow and I haven't had any of that since. I think it took maybe three times then all I had to do was warn him. .

I built in extra time into the morning routine to accommodate our daughter wanting to "sleep a little longer". Our daughter asked that we give her a "few more minutes" so I would wake her up and then ask, "do you want a few more minutes".. Usually she would say yes, or nod to me.. (eyes still closed) I usually would give her 5 or 10 minutes.. .I would still turn on the lights in her room..Many times she would get up on her own and get ready.

A few weeks before school starts, begin practicing good habits.
Place black out curtains in her room.(I hung quilts over the windows). Purchase a sound machine to block out neighborhood noises. Turn off unnecessary TV, Cell phones, etc.. so she will not think she is missing out on anything in the house. Make sure her clothes are picked out for the next day. Make sure her backpack is ready and next to the door. Make sure you know if she is taking or buying her lunch for each week. We used to plan it based on the school menu.

I also used to ask her what she wanted for breakfast each week so in the morning, I would have some of HER choices available.. We found our daughter does not like being asked questions in the morning, so this was a way she decided she wanted it to work in the mornings.

Let her make the routine her own. Make her in charge of the choices. I promise a working routine will will emerge..

My son went from taking one hour in the morning to 15 minutes. We employ a number of strategies. All these things are done the night before: shower, clothes picked out, lunch made or at least a plan is in place, coat and shoes are near the door. In the a.m. he cannot do anything "fun" until he is dressed, hair and teeth brushed, and fed. When he is ready he can have a little screen time until it is time to leave. Mind you we are not regular TV watchers and I limit video games to the extreme, but being able to play for 20 minutes before school has motivated him to hurry like nothing else. He'll even get up early some mornings for extra time. Maybe there is a motivating thing for her.

You could also try the approach of whatever state she is in when it is time to leave is how she goes to school. Her hair may be a mess, no socks, missed homework, no lunch, whatever. There is no better wake-up call than natural consequences. It seems to go against our instincts to send our kids off ill-prepared, but some kids need to "feel the pain" before they start to care.

My son is in 4th grade and we used to have this arguement every morning! Now he has his own clock and alarm and it actually goes off 15 minutes before mine does, lol! Plan ahead, and make her get up earlier. If she has to go to bed earlier to make this happen, so be it. We don't ever turn on the tv in the morning, no games, no cell phone, etc. He gets up, puts on clothes we laid out the night before and gets his own waffles or bowl of cereal. Then he feeds the dogs, brushes his teeth and hair and is ready to walk to school! Having his own alarm and getting up sooner made ALL the difference for us.

dont get her up in the morning. make her have her put together a lunch the night before and her clothes. put an alarm clock on her room but on the other side of the room so she will have to get up to shut it off. when you hear her up tell her to get dressed and that she has five minutes before you come back in. if she isnt dressed when you back in the tell her she has ten minutes to be in the kitchen getting something to eat or she will be going to school hungry and in her pjs. sometimes it takes tough love to get a child to stop dragging their feet. been there done that...still doing it some days here with an 11 yr old stepson. i stopped doing for him in the morning and making them more responsible for getting themselves ready before school or they get to go to school hungry and in pjs. i did that once...when it was almost ready for him to leave he said i am not dressed yet...i told him well if it was me i would hurry up because i am not signing you into school. you will have to explain to the principle yourself as to why you are late. i dont have a problem with him anymore coming downstairs not dressed and ready to leave in 20 minutes.

My 6 year old started kindergarten this year and he has no sense of urgency in the morning. I have just conceded that he needs extra time. He gets his bath the night before and I lay out his clothes before he goes to bed to save time in the morning.

This is how I had to do at first. His bus comes at 7:50 (but I tell him 7:40 so he'll be 10min early) so I turn on his lights and take off his covers at 6:45. At seven I go into his room (he's usually playing around) and tell him get dressed. I go in every 15min and each time he makes a little progress, undress one time, underwear the next, shirt the next. Usually he's dressed by 7:30. I then tell him to brush his teeth which takes 10min for some reason. By 7:45 he's on the porch waiting on the bus.

It took a couple of months, but now I only have to light a fire under him a couple times in the morning.

This is another thing that helped. He loves Fridays at school because they have PE. He had been dragging all week so I let him get dressed at his own pace and he missed his bus by like 20min. I told him I was not gonna take him and that's why I tell him to hurry in the mornings. I let it scare him for a while and he cried and I finally took him to school around 9:00. Since then, he seems to understand better that he can't take all day, and the world is not gonna wait on him.

Hope this helps

Allow her to experience the consequences of her actions. My sister was so passive aggressive in this behavior and my parents never dealt with it, she still HAS to have her own way in many areas. My brother and I always begged my mom to just leave her behind (she was in 5th grade by this time) as we waited and waited on her (in the car) to go to music lessons. My mom didn't want to have the inconvenience of paying for a missing lesson or explaining to the teacher what she'd done, but I think one time would've done the trick.

Your daughter might not be ready for that drastic of a consequence, but sit her down before hand and let her know that her behavior is no longer acceptable and if she is not ready to go by a certain set time, she will have this consequence, and then move forward. It might take a lot of consequences, and you might have to keep adjusting your discipline, but follow through. This is a good training for her that will benefit her for years to come in many areas of life.

Best wishes!

I have a friend who has 6 kids and I take notes as I learn things from her. First of all, our roles as parents is to teach them how to become independent and make good choices with that independence.
So, plan, plan, plan. Before your bedtime routine, tell her the plans for the next day and have her lay out the clothes she wants to wear, pack a lunch, organize her bookbag, find her shoes, set out her cereal bowl and spoon etc.Then in the morning, she has most of the things taken care of and when you wake her up, tell her all the things that she has left to do before you leave in X minutes. Brush your teeth, comb your hair, etc. (My friend made a little laminated card with pictures of things that had to be done everyday and they marked them off with clothespins clipped to the side of each item.) Then give her a five minute warning before you leave and then LEAVE after 5 minutes and carry her to the car if you have to. In the car, you have a few things just in case like her least favorite pair of shoes for if she didn't put her shoes on, a granola bar in case she didn't eat, etc. And in the car, you have the conversation of how she can do better next time.
GOOD LUCK!

You didn't say how old she is. If she's excited about going to school, and BEING A BIG GIRL, take her excitement down a notch with some reverse psychology. "Big girls don't dawdle, but get up and ready and out the door in time. Maybe you aren't ready for school"
Or, "There's a time frame with going to school. If you can't get moving, then maybe you aren't school material". Make her want to get moving. Suggest getting clothes to wear out and ready the night before. And whatever she chooses, there's no changing her mind in the morning.

I'm not sure if you've tried this yet.......giving her a visual schedule to follow in the morning of what she needs to do. I am an occupational therpaist for a school district and I have made up many of these for parents that are having your same problem. I'm not sure how old she is but you can use pictures or words followed by a box area to right of it to check off when completed. I have laminated them and then laminated check marks and used velcro to hook them onto the areas when completed. This way your not repeating yourself in the morning and she can become a little more independent. I would give it a practice run on a weekend. Just a thought.

Don't argue, don't fight. Work out a time frame with her. Set the expectation and set her alarm and if she isn't ready for the bus. She stays home or my kids pay me to take them to school. I have not had to do this for years. I have three kids. I do wake them up, but they give me their "wake up" time. Then I say good bye as they go out to get the bus. Make it her responsibility. If she doesn't get it early she will always be late.

Down time before bed, limit drinks & food after 6pm. Lay out clothes the night before, pack lunch/ do anything you can to prepair her for the day ahead. Schedule, for her breakfast for the week. Be glad to have a daughter who has a relaxed attitude, better than being stressed. Best of luck to you both