Seeking Advise About Child Support

depensing on what stae you live in you can actually get his rights terminated. I just moved back to Abilene, KS from Sapulpa, OK. In the stae of Oklahoma it is 13 months without contact and no child support. Even if he makes visits you can still try to terminate his rights. Ask your son what he feels about that. You will have to put it in words that he will understand. If you need to you can e-mail at ____@____.com. I will give you all the support you will need. What does your son call your new husband?

I know this is old, but girl give me a call sometime. I live in Beltona dn I am currently dealing with the same thing. Call me I am glad to help and will tell you why when we talk. It is all about the kids and no one else. My number is ###-###-####. I live in Belton so we should get together and talk. I will help you all I can. I've been there and know the feeling.

TTYS,
L.

Hello! As others have advised, you can contact your local/state child support enforcement agency. In Illinois, you can go on the web to ilchildsupport.com for information regarding non paying parents. The website is very informative and helped my husband when we took the non paying mother back to court for back support, medical and what not. As an add to this advice, you can apply to receive the non paying parent's tax return for each year that the non paying parent is behind on child support payments. You can contact the IRS to notify them but we went through the Illinois Child Enforcement Agency. They were very helpful and filed all of the papers needed and also went to court on our behalf to get the child support refigured to the correct amount. They also filed to have all tax refunds be mailed directly to us once she files with the government. Also, we are getting paid interest on that back amount that is owed to us. And if she quits her job or defaults on her payments and back payments, as long as she is not paying, her picture goes on the website as a non paying parent and if she does not continue to pay then her drivers license can be suspended. This agency has really made a difference for us; especially since we spent 3 years in court on our own to try to do the exact same thing that this agency has done in less than a year! Good luck! I really can understand where you are coming from in your situation. We are still thousands of dollars owed in back support! But we are now getting paid! Sincerely, T..

I agree that the CSE will step in to collect - garnish wages, etc. My ex changed jobs and I lost just under 1 payment before he got all the paperwork filled out at his new job - during that time I called to get info and they said it had to be 1 full payment (or maybe 2, I can't remember) before they step in. Since you've missed more then that I say go for it! Even if you are able to provide for your son without the support, you can always put the money in a college fund or something else like that for him.
Good luck,
J.

My husband pays child support. This is through Muskogee County mind you. Muskogee county has an awesome judge when it comes to child support. He doesnt let dad's get away with anything. If your child support was set in your divorce decree and he is supposed to pay it directly to you then CSE wont know that he isnt paying. If you go through CSE and tell them that you want him brought to court they will schedule it and take him to court and order it to be garnished from his wages. Now if he doesnt make much money then you wont get a lot because depending on whether or not he is supporting other children or wife in another household will depend on how much they are allowed to take. The most they can take from his check if he is single with no other children is 60% of his take home pay. And that is all child support he pays out total to all kids. But definitely get CSE involved and keep on them. You drive them crazy and they will want you out of their hair and the problem resolved. And the sooner that you file saying you aren't receiving support the more back support he will have to pay because they will go back to the point that you filed. They wont go back any further than that. So you want to get it filed ASAP!! We luckily have a friend that works in CSE in Muskogee County so if you have any other questions that you need answers to just let me know and I'll do my best to get the answer for you. Good luck.

I have been back and forth with this problem for years, and my son is now 16, and I have court ordered child support. I have been toldthat I would have to take his father back to court, even though I already have the order. I think that this is stupid and nothing but a money game, but that is what I have been told. Also I was told that legal aid helps some mothers, but only with child support, not other things like school fee orders, or medical bills. I am in the process of going back to court soon over orders for college tuition,which just puts more strain on the parent that is already paying for everything. K.

A.,
I can only imagine how hard it is to look into the face of a man who will not help you take care of their child! AGHHH!

Alot of times the man does it to hurt you, not realizing that he is hurting the child. Is CSED involved? The only time the state will really step in is if you are already involved with them. By contacting CSED they will go after back child support also, if he does not send the money directly to them, they will garnish it out of his check, and/or take any tax refund due to him.
One thing I know many people get confused on is this...just because you are remarried your new husband's income will play no part in how they determine what your ex will have to pay you, it is soley on what you earn.
I bet it is frustrating, I hope this helps.
L.

If you haven't done so already, open a case with Child Support Enforcement in your state.

Here is a link for Missouri which includes an application form:

http://www.dss.mo.gov/cse

Per Federal regulations they have to process your application within 20 calendar days (have an interview with you, etc) so be sure to follow-up.

As with dealing with all State Child Support Enforcement Agencies, you will more than likely have to do much of the legwork and keep on them to get your case into the courts, but with patience and perserverence it can be done.

Best wishes!

I don't know about the state of Missouri, but in the state of Kansas you can not terminate visitation because he hasn't paid child support. Visitation and child support are seperate issues and will be handled as such. I had a problem with my ex (who now lives in Texas) not paying. I found out that I was in violation when I didn't let him claim 1 child on taxes because he was in arrears. I was told by my lawyer that if he was in arrears I got to claim both. well, not so and his arrears were wiped out because I claimed both children on taxes for 3 years. Kansas Child Support enforcement is who I have used for over 5 years. they find his jobs and issue the garnishments so you don't have to use a lawyer. In Kansas they get a percentage of your child support, but you can also make the non-custodial parent pay 1/2 the enforcement fee. For me in KS it is like $6 a month. Not much compared to a lawyer!!!! If they keep falling into arrears, I've been told there isn't much you can do except intercept tax refunds and the possiblity of DL revocation. (ks doesn't do that and since my ex is in Tx they may not either) Contact your state child support enforcement and go from there. doesn't hurt to read up on some laws on the internet either. that's where I found that he could be made to pay 1/2 the fee. KS CSE didn't tell me.

Good Luck!!

Im not 100% positive about this, but if its court mandated support, you shouldnt have to hire a lawyer, just have proof that hes not complying and report it. To whom? Im not sure, hopefully someone else would be more helpful, but I agree, if visitation is court mandated, you cant refuse it or youre in violation also. Messy business, good luck

A.,

I know how you feel my daughters father pays but not what he should and he refuses to pay half of the medical that my husbands insurance does not cover he tells me to take it out of what little bit os child support I do get. I can give you the number to the MO child support office that I go threw they may be able to help you get your child support are tell you what you need to do as far as taking him to court to get. I have had more help with MO Child Support than I ever did with TN Child Support they never helped they told me it was my job to get my money not theres but MO has done everything they can to get me more but he lies to them about what he makes so that doesn't help. Here is the number to call hope it helps ###-###-####.

T.

My sons dad tried to pull the same thing. We separated when he was 6 months old. I called the local courthouse to see what I needed to do. They set me up with Domestic Relations. When I first petitioned it, I had to pay a fee but that was in a different state. Then they set up a meeting between you and the father and a consiliator to determine how much to pay. Once you both decide on an amount, the arrears get factored in too( the money that he owes you). You definetly need to get on it! That could be for your child's education or a new car for their 16th birhtday!

I have a sister-in-law who goes through the same thing. If you live in the state of Missouri, I believe it is up to you to keep track of how much he is behind and then you have to contact Division of Family Services at a certain amount. Once you tell them, they will then go after him. If it's been two years I'd say he's racked up enough for them to go get him. I don't believe you need an attorney for them to get him and if he's working (try to obtain his Social Security Number) have them garnish his wages. Then they'll get it (you'll get it), before he even sees it. Good luck to you.