Seeking Advice on Chores for Children

Hi, with my 6 and 7 year old boys, they trade off each week, one does unloading of the dishwasher whenever needed, and take out trash whenever needed( as well as bring in can and recycling after trash day). They each get 25 cents per year per week. My 5 year old takes care of the cat food and water, whenever needed. They get paid on Sundays and so look forward to watching their small mason jars grow with change. They are also to do whatever additional things asked, like pick up rooms, etc. This seems to work. Although my 1st grader seems to think he is getting ripped off as a lot of the kids in his class get $5 a week to his $1.75. I just tell him that people do things differently, and this is what we do. NO arguing, or there doesn't need to be ANY allowance given.

S., S., S.,
Today's kids have it so easy and it makes me sad to think how we are doing a disservice to our youth by not only NOT expecting them to pitch in around the house and yard, but we are bribing them with "allowances" to even do the work to begin with. My two kids, ages 6 and 10 received a "baby bootcamp" this summer when I realized they had no ability to take care of things for themselves like make a sandwhich or clean a dish or hang a shirt. It was a rude awakening. Now, 6 months into it, they are an amazing help to me and to eachother and I am blessed to have taught them self suffiency in its first stages. Unless your girls plan on being rich or marrying rich and having a full time house staff -they will need to know that work is essential to survival, and skills go further than just at home. It's an attitude of confidence and capability, they can DO ANYTHING because you teach them that it is their responsibility to know how and it is their priveledge to be able to work well and do it right. No money. This is a family-everyone carries their weight and no one is anyone else's servant here. Teach them the value of getting it done together and alone, and for the mere sake of contribution because they respect themeselves and the other family members. Besides, with three girls at your disposal, you should NEVER have to clean a dirty dish again until college time. It's your turn for other things, momma, and let the girls become self sufficient capable women as they grow up. Save the allowance for "extra" work or even better, for good grades or towards money earning endeavors like lemonade stands and babysitting. Teach them to earn money using their skills. Save the chores for a no-excepton way of living in harmony and respect.
Julie

I found a website called handipoints.com it is a chance for you to asign chores and the kids to earn points as they do thier chores! I have one set up for 3 of my kids and they like to do chores to earn their points.

At 6-7 yrs my daughter had to set and clear the dinner table. I got the dishes out of the cabinet for her and set them on the counter. Now she is 9 and she has added the dishwasher load/unload to the list.
I guess your younger girl could help with keeping the daycare toys tidy and vacume daily.
Suze Orman was on Oprah one day and answered the allowance question. I loved the answer (although I haven't implemented it yet.. i'm dragging my feet).
$0.10/min of work. If they work quickly and efficently.. $0.20
If it takes her 10 min total a night for dishes, then that is only $5 (my daughter is at dads on weekends) a week, $20 per month and that is more than enough. but it teaches her how to earn money in the real world- wich unfortunatly is coming faster than I would like :-)

ps I quit my job last march to do daycare from my home and so far it has been the best decision. Keep up the good work.

When our son turned 4 - we started allowance if he did his "star" chart on the frig each day. The chart started with:
1. Brush Teeth - twice a day
2. Get Dressed
3. Make your bed - wasn't perfect -- but that's ok
For doing these tasks each day, he got a star. At the end of each week, we gave $4.00 for a perfect start chart.
When he turned 5, he got $5 per each week and we added something small to the list.
Fast forwarded to age 10 - he got $10 per week, but his chores were more helpful round the house, like garbage, feed dog, sweep front porch, or whatever. He is 14 now, but we never increased past $10 each week --- rather, we "contract" special chores for extra money. So - he has a base pay for being responsible to his basic chores, but knows he can earn more, if he helps out more. We stopped paying him in cash, but rather keep a running chart on the computer of money in/out. The deal is, we never buy his toys or video games, he has to save his weekly amount. Anyway, he has learned alot about budget, how much things cost, the value of saving money, etc. This works great for us. I am sure you could modify this for your girls. I have an only child - and has helped us not to over-endulge him. And now with our economy being fragile, he understands our need to budget. He is doing the same and is making more careful spending choices.
Good luck to you!

http://www.handipoints.com/index.php

this is a great site that not only helps you decide age apropriate chores but helps kids with goals and follow through. Good luck!

Well there are a lot of chores that come to mind as long as you don't need perfection. Folding towels and putting them away, setting and clearing the table, unloading the dishwasher...the six yo could do the silverware *good sorting activity* while the 8 yo unloads cups, etc. They can also straighten the bathroom (wipe counters, hang up towels) while you still do tub and toilet, mirror. My kids were good about sweeping the entryway or vacuum a room that isn't enormous. My kids started very young to plan a night each week they did dinner. At first it meant just shopping with me for ingredients, then as they got older it turned into dumping canned veg. in pan, put tator tots on the cookie sheet, then eventually they learned more and more. My 11, 14 and 16 yo. now plan and cook the whole meal and do clean up that night...it's great. I learned the hard way...make them clean up afterwards. It started out that they used every pan in the house LOL and MOM did clean up. Now we have the rule, make something you don't mind cleaning up afterwards. It helps out because each of them take a night (3) my husband takes a day, we have a friday night free for all where you eat what you want, and then I take 2 days.

I have 3 children (13,10,7). At our house we use the "marble jar" incentive for chores. I have a list of everything each child must do in their day. It's even divided into before school and after school and weekends. Things like make bed, clean room, do homework. They each also have a cleaning chore - take out trash, vacuum, clean bathroom. Then I add to the list skills they want to learn - practice basketball, play piano, study Spanish. They each have about 10-15 things in their list. They each have a bag of 100 marbles and when they complete one of their tasks they put a marble in the jar. When they empty their bag they get $10 and we start again. We revise the list about every 2-3 months, adding new fun things, increasing the difficulty of household chores, taking things off that now they just do routinely. It has really worked for us. It gives them alot of incentive to work hard. The more things they accomplish in a day, the faster they get rid of their marbles. I also use it as reward for good behavior. If they help me do laundry or set the table without me asking or do a chore not on their list I give them a marble. The opposite is true also. If they misbehave I have them put marbles back in their bags. When they get their $10 they are required to take $1 and give it as tithe at church and they must take another $1 and put in in a savings bank.

My 3 yr old loves to help out with whatever she can do. She sets the table, takes clothes out of the dryer, puts clothes in the washer and would love to sweep the floor. She can't really do that well, but she loves to try.

I think that an 8 yr old could do almost any job you have that isn't too heavy lifting for her. The 6 yr old would do great at table setting, etc.

I totally agree with you on the idea of jobs that are their responsibility and then others that they can earn money by doing the job. I would probably go for a money amount for how difficult the job is rather than per age. Maybe that is because I think that I would go broke paying my children by age.

Making beds, cleaning their room, setting table and those types of things, I would not pay for them to do.

Cleaning windows, sweeping the garage, doing things around the house that are "extra" or can go a long time without being done, but it is nice when it does get done.

GREAT question, S.-- 6 & 8 - there's just a few things they CANT do ( cooking would have to be pretty basic - though there is a lot they could do -) vacuum, laundry for the 8 year old- folding and putting away for the 6 - putting toys away both in their rooms and in the areas where other children play - dusting- raking leaves outside- even raking the lawn ( to make is safer if rocks get into areas where little guys play) -- truly- you are at a place where the list of what they CANT do is getting shorter than the list of what they CAN - I 'spect your older one could make a simple casserole to go into the oven or microwave ( with YOU being the one to take hot dishes out- natch) - but she might love that- .

Enjoy -
Love
J. aka - Old Mom

Chores are so important. Our three year old has them. Very simple ones.

1. Set the table
2. Feed the dog
3. Pick up your toys

We we get home at the end of the day I ask her to do them and she will. Its great. I always thank her for 'helping the family' explaining we all have to do our part.

If you have an 8 and 6 year old, they can do all sorts of stuff.

load/unload the dishwasher/wash dishes
sweep/vaccum
sort laundry
dust
take out the trash
keep thier rooms orderly and clean

Have fun with it - I find the more I have my 3 year old 'help me' the happier she is and the more proud of herself she is.

I have an 8 year old Step-daughter and a 5 year old son. My SD is responsible for feeding the dogs, and taking out the recycling. My 5 year old son is responsible for taking out the trash. My 8 year old will also do dishes sometimes, and they have to keep thier rooms clean. My kids also bring out thier own laundry on laundry day, if they dont bring it out then it doesnt get washed and thats thier own fault. They only get an allowance for taking out the trash and feeding the dogs, the rest is stuff they have to do for chores.

We have four kids ages 12, 10, 6 & 4, who all do chores. For wages we give them one dollar for each grade they are in school which works out pretty well. (preschooler gets .25/week, kindergartener .50/week, 5th grader gets $5/week, etc.)

I would suggest starting with having each of them fold all of their own clothes and be responsible for keeping their room clean and picking up every night. Your 8 year old should be able to use the washer with supervision...maybe even your 6 year old. Perhaps they can help take out the trash, empty the dishwasher. My 4 year old has been folding all his own laundry for over a year along with most of our towels (he even lays out the big ones and folds them on the couch or the clean floor) and then puts them all away. He also picks up all his own toys.