Returning to Work ..need Advice!

Updated on September 20, 2008
S.K. asks from Madison, TN
16 answers

Hello, i'm wondering how other moms dealt with going back to work. My son is 16 months old and i plan on putting him in a MDO here soon. I know he needs to have interaction with other kids but i know it's going to be hard...he'll have to transition to one nap/day. What can i do at home to make this whole transition easier on him and me?
thanks for you help

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C.W.

answers from Lubbock on

Honestly, since it is a different enviornment he'll adjust better than you think to the one nap thing. Good luck with work and all!

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

i've worked since day one (went back 2 weeks post partum) with first child in day care till he was 4, then SAHM till 3.5 yrs ago, now part time working. which means second child has been in day care since age 1 and is now in preschool 4 days a week. they have never had an issue adjusting or more health issues. yes they are only little once, but i'm much more sane when i'm working. ;) if you want to work, then work. kids are incredibly resilent and will adjust to any healthy atmosphere. i like the suggestions of finding out the schedule and starting to stick to it now! just remember, if momma ain't happy, nobody's happy!

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J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

If you are really enjoying being home with him, think about where you could do without some things you want as opposed to need, and the expenses it takes working , extra gas, maybe fast food or quick cook things because you weren't home to cook, and the daycare expense, and you may be surprised that your take home pay isn't that much above, and you can stay home another year or two with your little one. They are only little once, and it goes by sooooo quick. I know I didn't answer your question, but I had four and we did without some things we wanted, but not without anything we needed, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

Start by removing one of his naps, getting a sitter for the afternoons... Good luck.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

I started by taking my son for one to two hours in daycare. It was h*** o* both of us, but less stressful knowing it was for a short time. Before you actually start working, take the time to get use to a different routine. Working part time might be better too.

I went to work when my son turned 2, but in retrospect, I wish I never did. I thought I would go crazy staying home, but if I knew how to find things to keep me interested and finding a network of other mothers in similar situation would have provided plenty of social interaction. It's so much easier to do that now with the internet!

I stopped working when my son was eight and found a way to work part time from home and readjust our finances. It is worth it!! My son did better in school and the family ate at home. The stress decreased to an acceptable level. What ever you decide, take the time to plan and give yourself, and the baby, time to transition. Good luck!

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

It will be tough for the first two weeks or so. It takes them a bit to transition. The best thing to do is be consistant with what they do at school. Maybe you could call the school to see what kind of schedule they are on, i.e. naps, food, snacks, etc. I would start implimenting that schedule in at home before starting school. Toddlers are so in to routine that this will help a lot and know what to expect. Also, you could do some practice runs to school, i.e. get him ready for the day and take him to school at the expected time. You you could do a tour of the school with him so he has seen it before. The best thing is the schedule. I know with my toddler she is fine as long as it is consistant and the same. Any change throws her off. Just be patient and impliment as much as you can at home before starting her in school. That would be my best advice. Also, prepare yourself as well. He will most likely cry when you drop him off because this is change for him. DO NOT linger. That is the worst thing you can do for him. Give him a hug and kiss goodbye, then leave. It will be really hard, I cried in my car once :( Good luck!!!

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H.K.

answers from Dallas on

I have some advice on how to make the transition easier and where you could possibly get a job cleaning houses.

1. Could you get someone (maybe your Mom, Sister, Best Friend) to come over and let you leave for say 1 - 2 hours? This would help because it would be short spurts of time that Mommy would be gone.

2. Call the place where you'll be taking your baby and ask them what time they take naps. Start laying your son down for 1 nap a day at that time to transition him into that while you are still at home with him.

3. If you're looking for work call Vicky Gillispie at ###-###-####. She has owned and operated Fuller Brush Home Cleaning since 1972. She is my Best Friends Mom (My 2nd Mom) and if she is hiring she is a wonderful Christian woman to work for. I have also worked for her in the past.

Good luck on everything and God Bless!

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D.R.

answers from Dallas on

Hi, I work in a MDO program with one year olds. Lots of our babies still take a morning nap at home and do just fine with the one nap at MDO. Our program is from 8:30am to 2:30pm on Tues. and Thurs. Our schedule is snack at 9:00, lunch at 10:30, and nap at 11:00. We take them from the nap room to the class room at 2:00 where we have another snack and then they go home at 2:30. We keep the kids so busy that they only get fussy before lunch time. Your son will do great.

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

Hi!
I am asahm & have been for 6 yrs. I own two business' that have allowed me to do so & I wouldn't trade it for the world!
1) Ignite/Stream Energy is a Retail electric provider along side TXU & Reliant that offers competative pricing for electricity. 2) Thirty~One Gifts is a direct selling co. started in 2003' that has grown, like Stream Energy, at a rate of 400%!Both have brought so much to my life. I have a kindergartner & am using both as an ice breaker to meet new moms & teachers at my sons school & neighbors. They offer quality products at affortable prices & really cute!! Consultants & products ARE NOT saturated in any one area so that leaves the playing field WIDE OPEN!!
I will leave you the websites for both & if you have any questions let me know!
Thanks! Good luck & God Bless!
Ignite: www.teamressa.igniteinc.biz
Thirty~One Gifts: http://www.slide.com/r/9GrKnklQ1D9wPNH68da2cmD9DSL-NymH?p...

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A.F.

answers from Dallas on

Hey S.,

Have you thought of working from home and raising your kid? I left a well paying professional job at Baylor Univ. Medical Center to be home with my little girl, now 16 years old and I would not trade it for nothing. Working from home also has given me time and financial freedom. Go to www.reliv.com/us and watch a 6 minutes video, if you like what you see, let me know for details.

Have a fabulous day!
A.

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G.A.

answers from Dallas on

I have a home day care and I do not make kids transision to one nap a day. I let them do it on their own. They need the sleep if their bodies demand it. I have a two year old that runs at home so much at night his body requires more them most do in sleep. He was a preemie and now weighs 30 pounds as a strong little 2 yr old. All this week he has slept the morning away. Then take another nap during the afternoon. If his body requires it he gets it. He is smart and uses his brain a lot and physically they run and wear themselves out. All are different. Some will only take one nap and sleep an hour or two but others will come after a week end when parents have them up late and running around town doing their errans and they come exhausted early in the morning. I believe Home Day Cares done right are the best kids can have. Best to you G. W

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S.S.

answers from Dallas on

Find out what the schedule is for the MDO classroom, especially nap time, snack time, and lunch then keep the same schedule at home.

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A.V.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with the moms on how well they adapt. I just put my 19 month old in daycare. The biggest adjustment we are still working through is separation tears. He cries every time I drop him off. He's over it pretty fast they say, so be strong. Fortunately, this is my second experience with daycare as my oldest was in as a baby. And, I know that this is really great for them. But, you might want to see if your husband can drop off and you pick up for a while. Take him to see his class one day before you plan to leave him there. Try a half-day the first day.

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S.W.

answers from Dallas on

I just put my 14 month old daugher in MDO last week to give her a little dose of daycare before I go back to work. I told the MDO Director that I didn't think she would nap at their nap time, but she said I would be surprised. She said that when the other kids lay down, that it is contagious. She was right. My daughter has done great with the schedule and didn't even cry on the first day. She loves it. It was so much better than I imagined.

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K.F.

answers from Dallas on

I have had probably about every work mom experience you could have so here's my story and hopefully it may give you some ideas and calm your concerns.

I had intended to leave my daughter with someone for at least a few hours at a time on a regular basis from the day she was born so that she was accustomed to being away from me. For various reasons, this did not happen so the first time I finally did, I was terrified she would make the woman miserable but she had a great time and never even cried until I came to pick her up at which time I think she just wanted to let me know how miserable she had been (insert big eye roll here). I think she was 9 months maybe. Anyway, when she was around a year I decided I wanted to start doing some occasional temp work so I initially made arrangements for her godmother to babysit. She watched two other girls approximately the same age. So I figure I work a few days here and there, make some extra money, child gets socialized, everything is win-win.

Until the job after a week offered me a permanent position at a rate of pay that was just too difficult to turn down. So I rethought things and decided to take the job and work outside the home until I had another child. However, her godmother did not want three children all the time so I also needed to find a daycare. As I was looking, I commented to one of the ladies at the office that I was somewhat freaked out about whether putting her in day care was the right thing. The woman looked at me and she said, my children have always been in day care because I could never afford to stay home and they have always been happy and healthy, just find a good one.

I realized that the whole thing was more about me with the exception of course of choosing responsibly. I found a daycare across the street from the office that afforded me the ability to drop in at any time. I don't remember her fussing when she was left with her godmother or when she started daycare. I dropped her off without a peep and while she was happy to see me when I came to get her, there were no tears. I don't remember there ever being a problem with naps or anything else.

Now, with child #2, I wound up with custody of my 16-year-old stepson a month before he was born, and my daughter was 3. Working full time with two kids in daycare and a teenager to keep out of trouble was not really an option. So, I found a way to work at home, which I am still doing 13 years later. It has allowed me to do the stay-at-home mom thing including having child number 3 and has allowed me to keep the household afloat even after I split with my x-husband.

When my second child was about six months I started a secretarial business and six months to a year later I was offered a contract position to do my old job from before I had my daughter. I was the recording secretary for the zoning commission and board of adjustment and attended meetings two days a month, returned home and wrote the minutes from the meeting, it was a cool gig. By that time, my daughter was already in a MDO so she was dropped there and my son went to the same daycare that was also across the street from that job. Now, he was a pistol, cried like I was killing him every time I took him, which lasted about a minute after I was out the door and everytime I picked him up he told me he had a wonderful time. The only time I had problems with him and naps was when he was at MDO and I had to wake him and get him to the van quickly to drive across town to get his sister, he doesn't wake well.

My third son did MDO and from day one, went and loved it, again no problems with naptime. I think because they are running around and doing, they don't really realize how tired they are like they would at home. Most would also allow a child to perhaps lie down in the infant's room or something for a bit if he still seems to want an early nap. Also, at his age, are you really sure they don't have some kind of rest time in the morning? Most MDOs do not begin as early as daycare and they end before the afternoon is over as many of the workers have children to pick up from school.

Just remember that whether you wind up finding something that allows you to stay at home with him and just do the MDO, children will adapt and they need to do this, often when they seem so tiny to us we don't know how they could. Learning that they are okay away from mom and dad is a good thing and learning how to interact with other children is very important, particularly when they enter school. Chin up, just have to realize that the letting go usually starts earlier than we want it to.

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

Introduce your son to a new favorite blanket at home weeks prior to starting day care.One blanket will be required at the facility to leave through the week, and it will be less for you to remember to retrieve and take each day, this will lighten the load of sensitivity for him.

If you know for certain what facility you are taking him to,the two of you go there twice/three times a week for an hour and sit in on a class together so he will become familiar with the atmosphere, and during the trips, you can inquire of the schedule of meals, naps, routines and begin such a routine at home as well. He will adjust better if he is already familiar with it at home. I have now 5 gchildren, so with my experiences, "one just cant throw the children to the lions" and expect them to fend for themselves. Interaction is best if the time is available, but then, when there is a child, make the time. They grow up so fast.Good Luck> AMB

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