Pre-partum Depression??

Updated on June 20, 2011
R.W. asks from Salt Lake City, UT
14 answers

I am 33 weeks pregnant now and am having such a rough time!! This pregnancy has been physically MUCH more uncomfortable than my first two, but more than that, I am just nothing but a bawling, cranky, ornery, snappy wife/mommy!! It's driving me nuts because I honestly CAN'T control it. I hate that my poor husband and 2 children are constantly getting the brunt of my moodiness. I know moodiness is normal with pregnancy, but it's been pretty bad this time around.

Is PRE-partum depression a real thing? I've heard that if you have it, it sort of "leaves" you when the baby leaves you. Is this true? I had pretty severe post-partum depression after my oldest was born, so I know what to look for with that (luckily I didn't have it with my 2nd, I was so relaxed and happy after her!). I also plan to get back on the Zoloft immediately after delivery.

I know I only have a few weeks left, so I'm willing to just ride this out, but I'm praying like crazy that I won't have to deal with any major post-partum issues again once this baby arrives. What are you experiences? Thanks!

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M.L.

answers from Chicago on

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I had depression issues with both pregnancies and post-partum with both as well. The first time around I held in my worries and feelings as I thought "pregnant women are supposed to be happy and everyone expects me to be happy but I'm not so I must be a terrible person." I was mentally miserable and it wasn't until after I had my son and was at my first post-partum visit I told my dr. about it. I was then placed on meds and told how common it was. So, when I was pregnant with my 2nd I told my dr. right away once I started feeling the same. I think it was less so the 2nd time as I knew it wasn't ' just me' - that it is common. Best of luck to you!

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I don't see how a pregnant woman's patience level decreasing along with the increasing girth and physical drain is considered abnormal. I see it as VERY normal... you aren't feeling the same, looking the same, are unable to sit, stand, lie down, pee/poop, or dress the same. OF COURSE you will be a lot more moody!! My husband either leaves me alone when I need help, or is the other extreme - won't stop touching me when I want to be left alone!! My 5 y/o - I love her so damn much - but her constant talking, building things in the living room, leaving a mess, etc is driving me nuts!! This is NORMAL... we are both towards the end of our pregnancies and want our bodies back (I'm 35 weeks)!

Don't create a mental disorder for yourself because you are exhibiting normal behavior!! It will pass - most likely once you, newborn and family get into your new groove.

***ADDED after 2 flowers***
There is the abnormal depression as well as the NORMAL moodiness of late term pregnancy.

If women weren't expected to keep the same schedule and 'chores' such as working, being the main child caregiver of the family, the main cook/cleaner/laundress/etc... maybe the stress load would be more manageable and us pregnant ladies could be all smiles, giggles and glowers - but that is not the reality. Reality is - we are still expected to do everything on top of carrying a load of 50% more blood volume, having squished intestines, squished diaphragm & lungs, bladder that is ever full, horrible joint pain and charlie horses... of course we aren't going to be happy campers 24/7 - no matter how much this pregnancy is wanted. PERIOD

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E.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey Mommyjane,
My 3rd pregnancy was a tough one too! I mean physically & emotionally I was a wreck. Thank god I delivered 4 months ago. I have to be honest that I never suffered from any pre or post depression but this last pregnancy i think I had both! I dont know if it's because their is a big difference going from 2 kids to 3. Or stress & just the hormones but my advise is to take it easy, try to relax and take it day at a time. If I found myself cranky & snappy I would take a walk or let my hubby know so he can help a little more. It's ok to ask for help & admit when we are a little irritable. Hang in there & I pray you have a healthy delivery & speedy recovery :)

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S.R.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I do not agree that you are creating a mental disorder for yourself. Yes, the end of pregnancy is hard, but antepartum depression is a real thing and there are ways to help yourself. It's up to you whether you want to ride it out or not, but I'm all about talking to a therapist or finding some natural supplements to assist you!!! I know a great place that you can get information. At least call them to see what they think. They are in Holladay.
http://www.TheHealingGroup.com
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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Yes, it is real. It's actually called antepartum depression and you should definitely talk to your doctor about it ASAP. Your health and happiness affect your baby's well-being, so you want to make sure you are as healthy - both physically and mentally - as you can be. Don't just ride it out. Talk to your doc and see if there is anything you can do about it now.

Good luck with your delivery and I hope you avoid PPD this time around!

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

I'm sure it's a real thing. At my 37 week checkup last week the nurse gave me a depression checklist to gauge where I'm at emotionally. That tells me that depression while pregnant can be real. Discuss your concerns with your OB, and don't wait for your next appointment to do so. Call the office tomorrow.

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K.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Yes, it is VERY real. It is called ante-partum depression and about 20% of all pregnant women suffer from it. I had this for about half of my pregnancy and it was terrible. I will warn you too that women who have it are also more likely to suffer from post partum, so it might be good to give some warning to your OB about your current symptoms. I ended up having terrible post partum after I had my son, so pretty much you can say that I've had some kind of clinical depression for almost all of the past year. I'm just now starting to balance back out, but I'm definitely not 100% yet.

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W.M.

answers from Nashville on

I think there is a such thing. I was cranky and snappy too but unfortunately mine lasted most of my pregnancy. I felt so bad for my son and husband too but I could not control it either. My husband got so worried about my attitude and being depressed that he told my doc and she wrote me a prescription for an anti depressant. I ended up not taking it b/c I knew I could control it if I really tried. I had them if I needed them. Talk to your doc about it, sometimes you truly cannot control your feelings or emotions and it can be really bad. It may even make you feel better just by talking to your doc. Supposedly you can take the antidepressants without hurting the baby, it is common. And to answer your question about it leaving with the birth, yes it does. :o) I was fine afterward but if you had post partum, you may want to just make your husband aware to keep an eye on you and make your doc aware to keep an eye on you. Congrats!

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A.A.

answers from Provo on

Yes!! I too had antepartum anxiety/ depression really bad the last 2 months of preganancy and unfortunately it did not go away, but it got better slowly. So if you had postpartum, I would definitely talk to your ob so you can take precautionary measures. I would do a lot of self care! I was so worried about taking pills while pregnant and afterward, that I didn't get help for 6 months afterward... and I'm just finally feeling better after over a year. So take care of yourself! I'm so sorry, it really really sucks. But it gets better!!! Also, if you are having sleeping problems, do what you can to take care of that. I think my insomnia made my anxiety/ depression a billion times worse. Take sleeping pills if need, sleep works wonders!!

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J.P.

answers from Denver on

Hi--
I'm guessing your hormones are just more stressed out. With every pregnancy your adrenal glands get more and more stressed out. This throws your endocrine system out of balance and causes the depression symptoms. There are a few things you can do. Try taking extra vitamin C and B-complex---once in the morning, and once in the afternoon. Don't take it after about 3:00 because it will keep you up at night. You could also try things like chamomile tea to calm down. If you have access to a natural food store, check out Bach's Flower remedies, particularly the rescue remedy. This is safe during pregnancy ( as long as you don't over-do it--the essences have alcohol in them, but since you are only taking 4 drops at a time, it's not really a concern). You can also try homeopathics. A company called historical remedies makes something called calm drops. I lived on them when I was pregnant.
Finally, after the baby is born there are natural ways you can treat the depression if you'd like to avoid zoloft (I know from experience). If you are interested in learning about it I'm happy to talk to you further. I know some people aren't open to alternative remedies, though, so I don't want to force it on you.
Good luck with the end of your pregnancy. I hope you have a safe, easy delivery.
J.

M..

answers from St. Louis on

YES you can have depression while your pregnant, and NO it doesnt just "leave" you when you have the baby. Trust me. Unless your lucky.

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J.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I had some depression as well, I think maybe you could try something natural such as St John Wort, along with a B complex. (I call them my B Happy Vitamins) This has helped me a lot. I refused to take meds!

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Antepartum depression runs in my family. I wish I'd known it was treatable! But yes, very real, and very awful. It tends to come along with something nicknamed "the suicide hours". Typically sometime in the evening. My own was pretty awful. I'd sit in a chair just crying, and rocking, (sometimes screaming) literally holding onto the seat of the chair to keep from killing myself. I still have little half moon scars on my palms from where my nails cut into my palms. Mine lasted just over an hour each and every night.

The 'nice' thing about it, is that it was so predictable that I learned if I could just hang on long enough it would pass... but it was pretty nightmarish.

Like I said, it runs in my family, so I didn't even think to mention it to my doctor until after my son was born. We (my family) just treated it with gallows humor. My OB was *horrified* the day when my son was born and I was soooooo happy when the suicide hours came and passed for the first time in MONTHS without wanting to die. Come to find there are antidepressants that are safe to take during pregnancy, as well as short term meds that I could have taken (painkillers, mostly) as needed. Whoops. Oh well.

The VERY nice thing, is that yup! From the day he was born I just started feeling better. Who cares about no sleep? Because I felt more and more like myself every single day after birth the 'trials' of a newborn didn't even phase me, because I just felt sooooooo much better!!!

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J.R.

answers from Miami on

Hi. So sorry for what you are going through. I also had similar issues at the beginning. And then it went away....It is good you realize what you are dealing with it, and thus maybe can take some precautionary measures to give you a sense of control after birth. For example:

1. ARe all child care issues set up?
2. Cooking and cleaning issues organized for those first few weeks?
3. Good friends coming over for chats with you?

HTH. Jilly

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