Potty Training a 2 1/2 Yr Old - Union,MO

My son trained himself at 2 1/2. He has development delays in several other areas, but I never experienced the angst parents do over potty training. I owe that all to the fact that he was going through his naked stage that that time. He wouldn't wear clothing.

There is something about the feel of the pee dripping down them that drives the point home more than feeling the wetness in the area they have always felt it.

We had a handful of wet accidents and only one #2 and then he was potty trained.

If you have a weekend where you aren't going anywhere and have flooring that won't be totally ruined, I highly recommend just letting her go naked and see what happens.

My advice is to wait a little longer - even though it doesn't sound like you want to.

Not all kids are ready to be potty trained at the same time. Our son was a few months after his 3rd birthday. Our neighbor's son was closer to 4. He knew he needed to go and would have several accidents. He just was't psychologically ready.

From my experience with friends who pushed their kids (because Mom/Dad wanted it done and over with), there have been more issues with accidents/regression than taking their cues and letting it happen more on their terms.

In our son's case, part of it was his complacency and our dealing with my cancer. But, we've been fortunate to have few accidents.

We also refused to buy pull-ups. In my opinion, they don't really help them learn that it's not OK to continue to wet themselves. We opted for diapers until he was ready to go cold-turkey. We reserved Pull-ups for overnight until we knew he was ready to have underwear then, too.

Unfortunately, I don't have advice, but I do have a lot of empathy. I have twin boys (same age as your daughter) and feel your pain. One of them is totally into going and using the toilet, the other couldn't care less. The one who doesn't care will happily walk around with a dirty pull-up, too-- he's just not at a point where it bothers him. I agree-- it makes me crazy, too! I know people tend to say that boys take longer than girls (and I'm trying not to pressure either of them at this point) but maybe your daughter is just not quite ready for complete toilet training yet? I'm interested to see the responses you get. GOOD LUCK!

Knowing what to do, and being "able" to do it are 2 different things.
In toddlers... their cognitive ability is not always coordinated. Thus, they may "want" to do something, but my not be able to, literally. This is toddler life. They are not yet, fully developed, to do it all at-will.

The main thing is praise her for trying her best. NOT expecting perfection. Nor right away. Because, there WILL be mistakes, regressions, accidents. Even a 5 year old still has pee accidents. Normal. Normal. Normal.

So, either get irked/mad at every accident/mistake... or not...

Sure pull-ups are expensive. I did NOT use pull-ups for my kids, I don't feel its necessary. I just used diapers... then when they were fully in control of their body, I used the Gerber "training pants" underwear.
Here is a link:
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3...
It has a built in padding... to wick up leakage.

Also, a child has to be able to have the motor-skills & coordination to pull-down their own clothes, to learn wiping, and then to attain nigh-time dryness.... (which this is NOT biologically attained even until 7 years old, and is normal per Pediatricians).

Potty "training" goes in steps and is a process. Sometimes months. Not days or weeks. And, again, there WILL be accidents and mistakes. Its okay. Even Kindergarten kids have accidents... and still wear night-time diapers. ALL NORMAL.

Go by your child's ability & readiness. Otherwise, they will get stressed and not want to even try.

All the best,
Susan

The on-and-off success suggests strongly that she's not quite ready. If you can resist pushing the issue, she's just as likely to end up trained just as early as if you push it hard, and you'll all have fewer headaches.

If you enter "potty training" in the search box at the top of the page, you'll see that this is one of the most commonly asked questions. And a surprisingly common answer is that when parents back off on their eagerness for successful training, no more diapers, no more cleanup, etc., their toddlers eventually discover their own desire to succeed, and the process becomes quick and easy. That was my experience with my own daugher, too.

Dear mommy! First let me say congrat to the new world of potty training. let me get down to the true facts. Theres no rule like old school rules for potty training. Pull ups are out of the question. Because it tell your daughter that its a pamper anyway and its still ok to potty in it. Second putting a plastic panty on top of cloth is even more uncomfortable than a pamper because her butt can't breath. Heres what you should do. First dont give her to much to drink during the day until she get the idea of knowing when she has to use the potty. schedule her drinking time and cut her off after dinner which should be early about six pm or seven. Tell her no water or whatever she request because it take time for the liquid she has in her to pass through her body before she can potty. Use panties for her with nothing else so that she can get the idea and feel the difference. If she does potty you let her know that thats not a good thing repetitiously until she understand and she will. be stern as a mother but loving and gentle at the same time. At bedtime you can use the plastic over her panties or the pull up because she will be sleeping and thats another stage that she has to learn. let her use the potty before she goes to bed and the first thing in the morning when she wakes up just as you do, Its sometimes good to let her see you use the potty she may want to join you and sit on her own Make it fun and she will want to do it often. If you do this consistantly for about a week or two. She should be well on her way to telling you when she has to potty not the other way around. Remember to be stern but dont let it drive you crazy. I never use a pull up or a plastic panty with my five children. i just kept at it and in no time they were using the potty. And dont forget to teach her to wash her hands after she through children like playing in water and that may encourage her again to want to use the potty. Blessings.

I know pull-ups are expensive, but I don't think your little girl is totally ready for potty training. Why don't you back off and give her a little break and see if in a month or two her telling you she needs to go gradually happens with more frequency. When that happens, she's ready for it.

Hi C.,

Your daughter sounds like she's doing great to me! You sound like you are being patient and consistent which is hard, but I believe is the most effective way.

We really went overboard with the praise when our kids were potty training. We have them treats, let them call Grandma, made a sticker chart, clapped and shouted...whatever made the kids feel great about what they had done! When there was an accident we tried not to get upset and just say, "I know you can do better next time."

You can do it!

God Bless,
A.

My advice, take it or leave it, is to not use any plastic pants or pull ups at all. When you put on the panties, whatever kind you use, nothing over them. Take her every 15 min. if you have to for the first day or so and then go to 30 min. You know she can go so you need to be the one to remind/take her often. She's just not telling you all the time. I have found that any crutch, like pull ups, etc. will be wet pants with most kids in the beginning. But you will have a day or two of just going to the potty with her and staying on it and in a day or so she should tell you but if not keep taking her and reminding her. Some kids are just too busy or not interested to think about it until they are really trained. I think she's the perfect age for this and about the age I did my 8 kids. The first one I started too early, not knowing what I was doing really, and that was a battle so gave up until about 2yrs. 8 mo. and it was a whole different story then. Since you've started with this I wouldn't stop but start over on the 15 min. and you taking her. Get charts with stickers or whatever she likes, maybe find a small treat to give her when she goes ( with ours one had a mini marshmallow or two each time, one had m&m, etc.), nothing very bad but something she likes. We let one of our kids pick a little gift after he was going well and trained and he picked a very inexpensive little toy. Whatever your little girl likes is the key for a reward either daily or at the end. Praise her when she goes and tell everyone you can so she knows you are proud of her when she does tell you.

my daughter also turns 3 in july. we just got her trained last month...it was our second attempt at potty training. she was doing the same exact thing as yours the first time around so we just gave it a break for a while. she didn't mind being wet...she knew when she had to go and knew what she was supposed to do...had some good days/some bad and I too got frustrated...it wasn't good for either of us :-) It was SO much easier the second time. I didn't want to stop with our first attempt because I felt like it was all for nothing but I talked to my wise mother :-) who said to just look at it as the first attempt was step one...teaching her what it means to go potty in the potty chair and not wanting her panties wet, etc. and she really was much better prepared when we tried last month. Talking from experience now...i STRONGLY recommend waiting maybe a month or two and trying again. It's so worth it to wait until they are ready...i had no frustrations last month and she was good to go by day 3 and really haven't had any accidents since. After seeing how she was the first time around we knew it was going to be a matter of it needing to be on her time table...not ours to work.

i'll tell you what we did 2nd time around. i started telling her the day before that her diapers were almost gone and there would be no more and the morning we started training again we showed her how they were all gone so now she got to wear her panties. we told her a thousand times throughout the day "tell mommy and daddy when you have to go potty" (which she got mad at after a while so we had to back off on that...fiercly independent child and i do believe we were insulting her :) she wanted to tell us on her own!) and we had her keep checking to make sure "mermaid" and "dora" were dry and kept celebrating that...we called people when she went, ran around the house yelling and celebrating when she went (what toddler doesn't like mom and dad running with them in the house), we did stickers, jelly beans, watching a little dora as rewards...whatever we could find that she'd get excited about. We used pull ups (we call them naptime and bedtime panties) for naps and bedtime only but now we only use them for bedtime. Also, she ended up not pooping for like 3 days during first attempt cuz she didn't want to go in the potty...there were absolutely NO issues with that this time. like i said...she was ready and WOW what a difference!

Good luck!!!!