Please Give Me Your Opinion- a New Friend Asks That I Take Her Child Overnight

She's already asked you a few times to take her daughter overnight & you are still at acquaintance level, not full blown close family friend status? That seems strange to me. I really hope she didn't befriend you just to have a babysitter. Not that many people are that trusting nowadays. I wouldn't be comfortable with that at all, personally, and would say no.

Wow - no you are not way off. Not at all!

I would not even ask this of my best friend unless it was an emergency.

Weird.

We have a lot of sleep-overs so I would be inclined to say yes. You say it's not something you would do, but it's not you asking. If you like the Mom and the daugher is well behaved and polite, why not? If she stays once and it's miserable for everyone you don't have to do it again.
Maybe they don't have family to help out. Maybe her or hubby (or both) work weekends. Who knows. Does it matter?
**my kids have not slept over anywhere but Grandparents and I would never ask someone (other than grandparents) if my kids could stay the night unless it was an emergency. But, I would not have a problem with a friend asking me to take their child over night.

I'm with you on this O..

Some people are just trusting like that. I'm not and that is probably because of my own personal history.

Long story short. Go with your gut.

B.,

You can never go wrong with your gut. If you feel this family is "off" or the situation isn't comfortable for you, don't feel pressured to do this. I too would NOT let my kids spend the night at someone's house who they don't know and who I have known only 2 months! That is crazy to me! I don't even have them spend the night at relatives houses----they come over to mine instead :)

I think that if you are not comforatable then you should not do it.

Wait until you know them better.

But I will say, better to have her kid at your home than your kid at hers.

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Since you're not even beyond being acquaintances yet, let alone friends to good friends, I would lean toward saying no. If she's already been asking you several times when you hardly know each other, that just sets off some red flags to me. And then what happens when you start accepting her self-invitations? She starts pushing for your daughter to sleep over there before you're ready to allow it.

Personally I would put some distance between myself and this woman which should be easy to do if it's "just" a meet-at-the-park sort of acquaintance. I would be really uncomfortable with how pushy she's being.

I agree with you. It sounds like she is very comfortable with you and trusts you, and possibly she has been really desperate for overnight babysitting and thought your house might be a good option. Don't feel bad about saying no. I have agreed to take my nephews overnight not too long ago and they really are not that close to us, and it was really hard. They were good kids, but having extra kids at my house for an extended amount of time really wears me out. Plus they just do things differently... they wouldn't eat the food I had but then of course come bedtime are crying that they are hungry, they would not go to bed at bedtime and just jumped on the bed, cried that they were scared and wanted their mama, etc... I ended up calling their mom at 11:30 pm to come get them. My kids were really grumpy from being kept awake so long, and I was completely worn out. Anyway, that's great that you click well with her and I would just keep doing things during the day, and you can certainly tell her that you love hanging out but you are not big on sleepovers. I am sure she will respect that, even if she doesn't make the same choice in her household.

Go with your instincts. In this day and age, you need to be careful.

I do not let my kids spend the night else where...but I am EXTREMELY paranoid!

~I think this other Mom feels comfortable with you and probably REALLY needs a break?

I think it's very odd that she'd ask you to take her kid for overnights. As you say, you don't know her well. She's not a close friend. I wouldn't expect a new friend to take my kid overnight and I wouldn't ask someone to, it's polite to wait to be invited. She sounds like an opportunist.

That is too weird. I would not even ask my closest friends to take my children over night. I would steer clear of her if I were you. Your kids are different ages anyhow.

I feel sorry for the child. My gosh, she barely knows you and she is willing to leave her daughter with you??? How many other strangers has the poor child stayed with? Go with your gut.

I would wait until you have known each other for a while, at least a year or so.

You never know! You could be setting yourself up for getting used as a free babysitter or the child can accuse you of something you never did.

I have a friend I've only known a couple of months and I have watched her child overnight, and feel comfortable enough to ask them to watch my kids overnight if needed. So, I don't think it is that weird.

It does seem weird they have asked a few times though in such a short amount of time. Unless they have emergencies or other interesting circumstances, I would think this would be something that would happen only once in a very great while.

Im very paranoid about letting my kids sleep anywhere, so i dont. I have kids sleep over here all the time though.

I guess you and i seem trustworthy.

No, I wouldn't do it. sorry to say this, but people can seem VERY nice at first and then they're not. Not saying that's what's going to happen but my question would be - what did they do for "babysitting" before you came along a month ago? Something's not quite right.

That is really strange. Not so much the asking, though that is strange, but my oldest is 23 and I have four of those buggers. I think in all those years I have only had two events that would keep them somewhere overnight. Yet this friend has asked more than once? Even then it was family.

Strange.

I would go with your insticts. We do have sleep overs for my kids and their friends. I need to know the families before I would invite kids to sleep over or let my kids sleep over....much longer than 2 months. That is just me.

No matter how much she needs a break. I think its too much to ask of someone you just met. Other then my parents I would not ask anyone.
I have watched my neighbors kids twice we trust each other with our kids. Both times were an emergency and we were happy to help them. We also have been neighbors for them with years.

The world is a crazy place sometimes and people are pretty sue happy. That mother can accuse you of anything (not saying she would) and it would make your life hell. Sometimes it is better to avoid the situation all together. It also kind of seems like she is the kind of person that will take a mile if you give her an inch.

I have not felt comfortable asking someone I have known for a short time to watch my children, so I haven't.

I do, however, have my children spend the night with one of my very close girlfriends at least once a month. I take her two children for regular spend the nights as well. It's a fantastic trade! I get to enjoy my space (and my husband) when my kids are at her home, and also get to revel in kid-dome when her kids are with me!

Also, I love that my kids can spend time with people who they really care about, and who care about them. My kids have an extended family of sorts with our close friends. If I did not create it, they would not get to experience extended family. And, I really like the, "it takes a village", attitude.

I have a new friend who just moved to our town to be with her partner, who is an old friend of my husband. While I don't feel comfortable having my children at her home, I am more than comfortable having her daughter at my house, and have had her over for spend the nights many times in the last few months. I like being able to give other parents a break, and love watching a troop of toddlers run around on the beach. My kids LOVE spend the nights.

My mom also lives in town, and my kids go over to her house for a spend the night every few weeks. It's not so that I can do anything particularly special/an emergency, but so that I can recharge and have space, which makes me a better mom. I love spend the nights (as does everyone involved).

ETA: I thought I'd share my experience, since it seems a bit different than some other folks :)

It seems odd, I agree but honestly I don't really have enough info to say if you're way off or not. Is there some sort of emergency or sick family member? Does the father travel a lot and there's no family to help? OR, are they just short on babysitters and so they asked you to keep her? It also depends on how old the child is...that would make a big difference.

To me it sounds like they could use some help. But that would still be hard to do if you really don't know them very well. Maybe you should tell her that you'd feel more comfortable watching her daughter once you know each others families better. Give it more time and then if you feel comfortable with her and her family maybe you help them out from time to time.

I need to know someone at least a year and been at their house a WHILE before I let my child sleep over at their home....

Funky thing is - i'm okay with them coming to MY house.....I know, funky... my kids starting having sleepovers at the age of 3...with people I'd known for at least 7 years....and they were only 5 doors down....

Go with your gut.

Say no. She's being a bit reckless having her child spend the night out with someone she doesn't know that well. Just say We don't do sleep overs".

I wouldn't do it . . .