Pacifier Issues - Lake Oswego,OR

The fear that sucking, on anything, will mess up their teeth or speech is overblown. Teeth issues are mostly inherited, and speech progress is developmental. Relax and over time his need for sucking will diminish. Distract him with new things, and slowly reduce the times you allow the pacifier.

Our Pediatric dentist told us it was no big deal if kids suck a pacifier. Their jaws are hurt much more from sucking fingers or some other thing due to needing to suck. If he needs to suck he needs to suck and will find something to suck. Pacifiers are made to conform tothe shape of their mouth and does not harm them.

T.:

My son, Nicky, was 5.5 when we took his pacifier away...it was HORRIBLE...now? he chews on his fingers...I'm have tempted to give him a paci back just to keep him from chewing his fingers!!! :)

We have found the chewy jewelry/necklace that looks something like a surfer dude would wear....it's helping a tad.

My guy went off his at 13 months, cold turkey. He asked for it and I told him I didn't know where it was (I really didn't) and he was a little sad but didn't cry. It took him a little longer to fall asleep that night, tossing and turning, but he didn't ask for it in the morning and until his nap (I still didn't know where it was.) He didn't ask for it that night and went to sleep just fine. I found it the next morning but tossed it as the worst was over, and after the third night when he asked for it but didn't fuss, he never asked for it again. I've read and heard that the first 3 days are the worst, and that's how it worked out. My cousin's daughter has a large space in the front of her teeth and misalignments, and is speech-delayed because of staying on a paci too long, her ped and the dentist told mom in no uncertain terms that she did the damage to her daughter's teeth and development, so I was really happy his weaning went so easily.

Since you really want to break the pacifier use, i would suggest you have a replacement item like a stuffed animal or blanket for him to soothe himself with, and introduce it when you take the paci away and use it as a substitute. The longer they are on them the harder it is to get them off them, so unless you want to go cold turkey, if he's using the paci all day I would hide it except for naps and bedtime. Then in a few days move to him having it just at bedtime, then in a few more days don't give it to him at all. Focus on his new stuffed animal, read him books, fill his bedtime routine with a bath, a massage with bedtime lotion, and relaxing, calming music, so he thoroughly relaxes and falls asleep without missing it. If he does miss it and cry for it, as hard as it may be for you, don't buy new ones for him.

As far as him replacing the paci with his fingers, children do this to soothe themselves, sometimes because they are stressed, so don't tell him he has to stop doing it, which could stress him. My dad would tell my brother to stop and he would hide and do it, but my mom wouldn't say anything but would keep my his hands busy whenever she saw his fingers going towards his mouth. Redirect your son when he show signs that he's about to suck his fingers with a special toy or activity like coloring with crayons, finge rpainting, blocks or puzzles he needs both hands to play with, holding and reading a book, giving him a snack to eat, etc., to help draw his attention away from sucking his fingers.

Of course he may still suck them at nap or bedtime when he's not busy, but children usually stop sucking their fingers and thumbs by 4 or 5 so hopefully in time as he gets more involved in other activities and interests he'll stop entirely.

I also agree that to still have a paci at this age is no biggie. Most are orthopedic anyway.

However - kids have paci either because they are using it to soothe or they are using it out of habit. You would deal with removing the paci really in the same way and that is to transfer his dependency on something that is more socially acceptable to you. So, for example a teddy bear, blanket, or other 'lovie' or something that he can hold, pat, hug or whatever when he wants comfort.

However, if your son still has an 'oral' need- then if you take away his paci you are right... he will use his fingers (or the bear or the blanket). My ex SIL took away her son's paci and so he ended up sucking on the edge of the blanket she had given him. She would have preferred he stick with the paci!!!!!!!!

I agree with Sue. I was a thumb sucker and I didn't give it up completely until I was 8! I never had speech problems. I did have braces, but not because I had buck teeth--I have a small mouth and my teeth were just crowded in. Conversely my son, who has never used a pacifier or sucked any of his fingers has a slight lisp and says Rs like Ws at the age of 4.5--totally normal, by the way, but has nothing to do with paci or no paci. If it is a comfort to him, I would let him have it for as long as he needs. Really, it's not as much of a problem as we seem to think it is.

What for? My older daughter sucked her thumb until she was seven. Of course she needed braces. Everyone in our family need braces. My second daughter had a Binky. She threw it away shortly after she turned 4.