Need Help with Sleeping Potty Training

Updated on April 30, 2009
K.J. asks from Karnes City, TX
17 answers

I have a 3 year old. She has been day time potty trained for over 6 months now. We rarely have accidents when she is awake. She tells me when she needs to potty. Sleeping is a whole different story. I'm not sure how to teach her to hold her urine while she is sleeping. Most moms I talked to say their child just stopped urinating in their diapers when they were sleeping. Mine hasn't and I am wondering if anyone has any ideas about how I can help. At nap her diaper isn't very wet. It is like she wets just before I get her up. There have been a few times that she has been dry. I praise her call everyone to have them praise her and give her a treat. She is very proud of herself, but doesn't stay dry again the next day. At night, she still has to wear a night time diaper and is completely soaked in the morning. Any ideas? Thanks.

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S.W.

answers from San Antonio on

I would not worry too much about the night-time potty training. 2 of my 3 kids wore pull-ups for a year or so after potty training, until they stopped going at night. Things to try are no liquids, or just a drink of water, after about 7 and going potty right before bed; it will happen. In the meantime, it's nicer to just wear a pull-up rather than get up in the middle of the night and change sheets! Good luck.

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

My daughter is 4.5 and still wets at night. I've tried taking her to the potty at midnight and 5 am, sometimes it helps, sometimes not. I know the frustration and we reward for "dry" mornings, but my daughter has always been a sound sleeper since birth and is difficult to wake up to potty at night. The pediatrician says to not worry until she is 6, that many children outgrow this. However, my husbands sister wet the bed until she was a teenager, so it may be hereditary. I try not to stress. Every few months we try night time training again. There's a website that has a lot of information on potty training that was helpful to me from the University of Michigan. Search their site www.umich.edu, "toilet training". I found all kinds of helpful info to get me through the frustrating times. I think there is a specific section about night time training and things you can try. Good luck!

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H.H.

answers from Houston on

I would say that this is completely normal. IF it's not affecting her, why does it bother you so much? Her body needs to be ready and just stop going at night or she has to feel the urge enough to wake. Neither of those things is happening, so she isn't ready for night training.

If you want to help, you could stop offering liquids after dinner. But I personally prefer my 4 year old well hydrated than dry right now.

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L.K.

answers from Austin on

A childs brain has to be mature enough to wake her up at night when she needs to go potty. Most of the time this does not occur until the child is around 4-6 years old. You can not teach her to hold it at night or get up and go. This is strictly a maturity issue and you just have to give it time.

Lisa

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L.T.

answers from Austin on

This is strictly an issue of physical development. She'll stay dry through the night when her brain and her body are ready for it. There's no motivation you can provide b/c as much as she may want to stay dry, she has no control over it.
The only thing you can do besides wait is to restrict water before sleeping and have her pee right before bed.

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K.P.

answers from Houston on

Her bladder isn't mature enough. I wet the bed until early teens and it sucked! My parents were very supportive. One thing they did that helped was before they went to bed they would get me up and have me go to the bathroom. I would wake up in the morning happy that I didn't have an accent an then would learn my dad got me up to go to the bathroom. My internal clock took a lot longer to mature.

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J.G.

answers from Austin on

My son day trained at just over 2, but didn't lose the night diaper until 3 1/2. For naps, we just had him pee before going to sleep. At night, we stopped giving him water around 1 hour before bedtime, made him go to the bathroom before bed, and for him, it just wasn't until 3 1/2 that he started waking up dry. Once we saw a pattern of dryness, we motivated him to stay dry at night by giving him a toy for making it through 1 night, another for making it through the weekend (3 nights), and a final toy for making it 1 week (6 nights). By that point, he was fully trained.

Really, it was mostly because his bladder was finally big enough to last the whole night. The toys just helped motivate him to try.

We're in the process of training my 2 1/2 year old daughter. She has been enthusiastic and basically trained since 15 months, long before she was fully capable of undressing/redressing herself or even physically ready to train - she still peed every 15 minutes. I've really learned by comparing my experiences with her to those with my son that there is a large physical maturity aspect to this... So, hang in there. I swear when it is time, it will be easy.

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E.W.

answers from Odessa on

I just went through something similar with my 3 year old. Finally, I was like, "enough"!! I was tired of buying pullups and taking off a soaking wet pullup (i have an infant and that is ENOUGH diaper changing for me!!)

At first I woke her up 2 or 3 times in the night to go pee. Then I let her wet the bed a few times (I put a folded beach towel underneath her so the bed wouldn't get too wet and I wouldn't have to change too many sheets in the middle of the night) and she would start getting up and I would leave a fresh pair of panties and new pair of pajama bottoms next to the toilet at night so she could go change herself. It took about a week, but she sleeps thru the night without having to pee now, and she even goes to bed with a cup of water next to her. Her bladder and brain finally work together so she can hold her pee for a long time if she wants to. And she is so proud of herself, she'll wake up and say "I didn't wet the bed!!". She is almost 3 1/2 now and hasn't had an accident in like, 3 months.

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R.M.

answers from Beaumont on

Most children don't totally potty train until age 3-5, so I've heard. You could start putting her in underwear instead of a diaper for naptime, and a diaper for bedtime if you need to, and place a potty training pad underneath her in case she wets. If she knows she's in underwear, it might possibly make a difference. Some people put a potty in the bedroom with their kids so they can use it if they need to, instead of trying to go to the bathroom by themselves. I hope this helps, have a blessed day!

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N.D.

answers from Houston on

My daughter had the same problem. She was potty trained shortly after she turned 2, but could not stay dry at night until she was 5. I tried restricting fluids, waking her up at night, and everything I could think of, but it didn't help. I talked to her pediatrician about it and he felt that her bladder just wasn't ready, and that she would eventually gain the control to stay dry all night. And she did. When her little body was finally ready. It's just a developmental milestone that occurs later in some children. If I were you, I wouldn't worry about it. Just be patient, and it will eventually happen. But most of all, don't attach any embarrassment to it. You and she will be much happier that way.

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E.B.

answers from Houston on

It's a time thing. When she is ready (physically) she'll be able to do it. My middle stayed in pull ups at night until she was 5 - she was such a sound sleeper- nothing would wake her up.

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J.M.

answers from Odessa on

Kayla,

I think your daughter is confused. By putting her in a diaper for naps and night time, you are telling her that it's okay to use the diaper. My daughter was fully potty trained before she was 2. I didn't use pull-ups and I didn't put her in a diaper for sleeping. Once she was ready, we went straight to panties and never looked back. We did have a couple of accidents (on the floor in front of the potty mostly), but it took three days total. I'm a big fan of the 3 day rule (it takes three days to learn something new). As far as hydration, she should be getting plenty of liquids during the day and at dinner time to keep her hydrated through the night. Being consistent is the best way to teach a child anything. I am about to embark on potty training my 19 month old B/G twins--God help me! But I plan on doing it the same. I am fearless this time around. I know that I will have to plan to be at home for 3 days and have a lot of towels on hand. The best advice: don't get too excited about it. It WILL happen ;)

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L.M.

answers from Odessa on

I wrote in on this issue not to long ago. I have twin boys age 3.5. I have one who is fully potty trained, and the other who is potty trained during the day, but not at night. We tried everything. Stopping liquids after 6:00pm, waking him up in the middle of the night to go potty, praising him, etc. The advice I recived, I listened to and I am at peace. I heard that 3 is still pretty young to hold your urine all night. There really isn't anything you can do. Don't worry about it and if she isn't ready, she isn't ready. Keep praising her when she stays dry at night. Other than that, put a pull-up on her, and go to sleep. Her bladder will eventually mature enough to hold it.

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C.B.

answers from Austin on

This is about physical maturation and nothing else. My youngest daughter wore "Good Nights" or whatever they're called until she was 7 because of this. Limiting fluids after dinner helps. NO soft drinks, which are diuretic, except early in the day. When her body is ready, she'll do this naturally. In the meanwhile, keep her dry and no big deal.

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T.J.

answers from Houston on

Unfortunately my advice will put you back into the newborn feeding stages. You will have to teach her to get up at night and start feeling comfortable about knowing that she has to go even in her sleep. My suggestion is to get her up every 2-3 hours at night. When you or your husband get up to go to the bathroom, you will need to get her up. It's training her body or sleepy mind to get into a routine.

Good Luck!!

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D.S.

answers from Killeen on

One solution would be to put her in real underwear. They feel a big difference when they wet a diaper/pullup verses panties. My daughter trained at 20 months. Once she was day trained, I did not put her in a diaper/pullup. You will probably have extra wash for a few days, but the feel of being wet may have her hold it. I wish you well.

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T.E.

answers from Houston on

limit the amount of drinks you give her right before bedtime. my daughter wore pull ups at night until she was pretty much five years old, i made her quit when i noticed she sat still in the morning and i asked her what she was doing and she told me she was peeing!! Stopped that real quick. children have a hard time waking up at night to go potty. don't worry about it until she gets older. she has only been potty trained for 6 months and she is doing great during the day so just keep reminding her to wake up and go potty at night but don't worry if she isn't dry in the morning.

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