Napping and Sleeping Arrangements When You Have a Baby and a Toddler

Updated on May 16, 2010
L.W. asks from Spring, TX
12 answers

Hi Moms,

I plan on starting to have baby #2. I have a two year old right now. And I was wondering, how do you work in a nap for your baby when you have a toddler?? I worry, that we will all be overtired and my two year old will be running around loud and rambunctious and the baby will never get any sleep. I know I am worrying way over the top here. I am not a stay at home mom, so this would be on the weekends etc. I know babies take a lot of naps for long periods of time when their young, and I worry my son will get bored because we have to wait for the baby to wake up from his naps. Anyways, just thought I would ask.

Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Thank you sooo much for all the wonderful responses. I feel a lot better now. it is always nice too know others have had the same concerns, and that it works out. Everyone's responses were extremely helpful.

Thanks again!

L.

More Answers

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H.A.

answers from Dallas on

The baby will be used to noises it hears while in the womb. So if your toddler screams, plays, runs around... if you have the tv on, vacuum, dog barks... none of those things will generally startle or upset the baby.

Don't try to keep a perfectly quiet house when the baby is born either. If you keep noises going when they are a newborn and don't tip toe around them - they will become used to the noise.

I play music for my kids when they sleep, I find that really helps give some soft constant noise and keeps unfamiliar noises from waking them. I have three kids and I have one that wakes easily, and two that sleep .. and could sleep through a train. I tried too h*** o* my second child to keep her away from noises, and she wakes if you even walk in and check on her.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.H.

answers from Washington DC on

Once we had #2 and then #3 a schedule for the baby kind of went out the window!....we got on with our day doing the things we had to do and took baby along with us , a tired baby will sleep , whether it's quiet or noisy , in the car , stroller or baby carrier. They really need to fit in with your family and schedule rather than the other way around , and I am not saying you should drag then here there and everywhere all day every day , mine still had naps at naptime in the crib , but if we needed to be somewhere then they slept on the go.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.J.

answers from Austin on

I have 3 (5, 3, and 7 months) and to some degree am struggling with the same issue, but the baby just sleeps when she wants and if she is tired it doesn't matter how much noise there is. The more tense I am the less likely she is to fall asleep. But, there is no regular nap schedule and at this point I'm not sure there ever will be one.

However, when I had just 2 it was easier. My oldest is only 21 months older than his brother. I would set him in front of a nice calming and long video with no commercials (otherwise if the show ended or a commercial came on he would come find me) and I could nurse or rock his baby brother to sleep. This was the only TV he watched during the day so it kept his attention and I didn't feel like a failure for having the TV babysit him. Plus, I got the baby down easily at least 80 percent of the time if not more so it worked.

Oh, and I would also use a white noise machine (check for safe decibel levels) to make sure my son would stay asleep even if his toddler brother occaisionally got a little noisy. Good luck.

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C.E.

answers from Provo on

yes, it's possible to have a light sleeper in a baby, but more often the baby will adapt to the noises of the house and sleep through it. there have been times my older kids woke the baby with their yelling and i cried because i was just about to take a nap myself. but we all survived. i got the baby back to sleep, or slept with the baby in my arms, or just didn't get a nap that day but slept eventually that night. it helps to get the older kids involved in something quiet, rather than just telling them to be quiet and leaving them to decide what "quiet" is. i often say, "oh the baby is asleep! let's get out something that we usually can't play with when she's awake!" depending on the baby's age, it could be puzzles, crayons, markers, legos, play-doh, paper-page books, small toys, or any favorite toy that your oldest has decided the baby is not allowed to touch. most of those things are quiet. if i need to take a nap when the baby does, but the older kids aren't ready for a nap, i put on a movie for them and sleep on the couch with them. or i ask a neighbor to watch them. good luck! it may go better than you think. i lucked out with my second baby. he napped at the same time as my 2 yr old for the first few months. you may get the same luck!

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T.I.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi L.,
I have a 3 1/2 yr old & a 7 month old - worried about the same thing but things are GREAT! I have made sure to have activity stuff on hand for my oldest & also sometimes just take him outside or something to play while my baby naps. Saturday mornings are a little tough as we go to the library during her nap time but I bring toys for her & make sure she has a full tummy and bottle (I pump) on hand. Sometimes she will fall asleep as I push her around so it works out. When we get home, I feed everyone lunch & then they both go down for naps - and they also share a room. My oldest knows he has to be quiet for his sister when she sleeps. Her naps give me time to spend 1-1 w/ him too. I too am a working mom & as it has worked out, we usually end up putting the baby in our room in the pack n' play to nap w/ the door closed during the day so our oldest can play in his room if he ends up not napping which sometimes happens. But at night they share their room beautifully. My husband & I are both committed to our children having plenty of rest so if we're planning errands, we're cognizant of one staying home (as much as possible) so they get their sleep. Well rested children & parents = happy babies & family!! What others have told me is that the children will get used to the noises & it'll work out & there can be adjustment periods but everything's worked out great for us! Good luck - I hope this has helped. T.

J.B.

answers from Houston on

My firstborn son will be three in July and my new little guy is 3 months and we just all have downtime at the same time. Everyday around 1 or so my new dude eats and goes down from about 1-4. I put my older one down for a nap around 2-4ish. I get the little one up and feed him and the older one and I make supper after that with the little one hangin out and watching. So far that is working ok. It has had some trying days!!!! I just posted about it actually;) But on the weekends I have his Dad here and we just go and do whatever is planned and baby sleeps in his carrier or on someone's shoulder or sits up and watches everything with delight. Also, my second can sleep through a freight train! No matter what is going on, if he is tired, he sleeps. The second one is so adaptable I think bc they come into a family with other kids so it is never all about them. I rocked my first all the time, the second I have never rocked. Just put him down and off to sleep he goes, he knows nothing else. The only nap I try to be home for is the afternoon nap when my older one sleeps too. So I think you will be amazed at how well things go in that regard, I sure was!! And yes the little one will sleep so much at first probably, that you really won't have to worry about your son getting bored, you can play with him while baby sleeps. It was really hard for me the first month or so but it is better now and all the moms really encouraged me that as baby grows, things get so much better!! Hang in there:)

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K.H.

answers from Houston on

I will agree with what most of the other mommies are saying. I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 7 week old who are both on routines. It is amazing what he'll sleep through! A few suggestions: Try to have your older one's nap coincide with one of baby's. Also, this has been a great time for my older child to play outside with me. I put a monitor in the window so I can keep an eye out for my son, and then my daughter can run around and be as noisy as she wants without me worrying that she'll wake him up. You'll figure out something that works for you and your family.

B.A.

answers from Austin on

The following article by Kyle Pruett, M.D., provides excellent insight on this topic. See the following link for more details.
http://blogs.goddardsystems.com/Cedar-Park-TX/2010/01/09/...

Children’s sleep issues are among the more challenging developmental stages for parents to master.  But biology is on the parents’ side in this one, because sleep patterns mature over time just like other developmental skills.

* The human brain is active during sleep, but the deepest sleep is typically at the beginning of the night.  Babies spend more time than older children in stimulating REM sleep, with eye movements and irregular breathing. Don’t worry about all that action in your child’s body – it too is growth.
* Start them young – do not ignore the importance of naps, watch for the yawn, and start bedtime early in the evening.
* The transition from crib to bed is also a time of sleep pattern changes, but most kids want it to work.
* To instill good sleep habits remember that consistency matters so much

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J.M.

answers from State College on

my youngest boys are a little under 2 years apart. as i am typing this my little one who is 18 months is napping upstairs while my 3 year old is running around playing and not being quiet at all. the baby gets so use to the comotion he can sleep through it. i also have a 5 and 6 year old. the baby just kinda set his own schedule. you will figure it out.

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C.C.

answers from Beaumont on

When the baby sleeps during the day and you are tired, have the big brother lie down with you and y'all nap, too...

L.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

Very easy. Let your baby nap and sleep in his crib in his room, while your other child is playing or simply awake somewhere else in the house. There is a point during your hectic weekends where you will leave your baby sleeping in the same room where your toddler is playing, jumping and yelling. Magically, you baby can adjust his dreams to a rock band next to him without waking himself up. Well, it is a little bit of an exaggeration, but pretty much most babies can sleep with some sort of noise around them. Having two little dogs that bark at the door bell or the sound of a car passing by, and a toddler that loves to jump and sing, will tell you how good second ones are in terms of adjusting to its surrounding. You will see it for yourself. Surviving skills are much better on second ones.

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C.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

I have a 2 1/2 year old and a six month old. Baby #2 is not on much of a routine at all and she seems fine with that. She sleeps in the car seat, stroller or in a sling carrier (kangaroo pouch) or front carrier (ergo baby) when we are out and about depending on what works for the situation. Last week we ran around the zoo for 3 hours while she slept in the pouch.

I'm not going to lie and say we aren't tired a lot of the time and good luck getting them to nap at the same time when we are home, but overall everybody is pretty happy. We have really worked with both kids on making sure their bedtime routines are very predictable though and that they both are getting a decent amount of night sleep.

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