Mother's Mixed Bag of Emotions over Sleepover Camps and Even Semi Local Day Camp

It depends on your daughter and on the circumstances. If it is a safe overnight, and she is ready to be away from you, send her. Day camp is certainly not something to be overly worried about, your concern for her safety should not keep her from experiencing safe outings, and is there to keep you from sending her places she should not go.

If your worry is out of proportion for what you know to be safe and good for your daughter, then you should be looking at yourself, and go ahead and send your daughter. You seem to be saying that you know you are having unfounded anxiety, not about the experience, but about how you will feel by sending her. If you think that you can get over it yourself, then I would give it a try. If you can't keep from imposing your anxiety on her by holding her back from appropriate experiences, and know that you are keeping her from doing things that she will enjoy, is ready for, and are safe, then you might consider seeking help to deal with the anxiety. A little is fine and healthy, as long as you don't let your fear stop her from having a full life!

I hope it gets better and that you decided to let her go.

M.

I think 8 is fine for day camps. Even if she doesn't have a friends going with her, she should still go. She'll make friends on the bus... As for sleep away camp - it really depends on the camp... The decision about sleepaway camp needs to be hers.

You need to let your daughter start doing things on her own. You aren't helping her by holding her back. The issues are yours not hers. If you are nervous, she's going to read that and decide that you don't want her to go... She will not have as good a time as she could or she'll just tell you she doesn't want to go. You certainly don't want that! Send her to day camp. Stick her on the bus and have lunch with a friend!

My youngest went to sleep over camp during the summer between 4th and 5th grade. She LOVED it and goes every summer. My oldest went the same year. The only reason we waited so long was we didn't know of a good summer camp until then. Now we all look forward to the 3 weeks when they are both gone to summer camp - it's a sneak peek at the college years. :-) I shovel out their rooms. I clean my house from top to bottom. We eat what we want when we want... I'm not saying we don't miss them, but we don't worry about them. We know they are safe and well cared for.
YMMV
LBC

I still get a wee bit nervous to see my son go (he is 11) now, but he needs to. Life has risks. They need to learn how to live, really live. Not in fear. Our fear will only hinder their growth. It would be good for you too, as you will learn to let her go in smaller dosers, eventually she will need to leave for her own life, college, family. You need time learn how to spread you wings as well.

I understand your nervousness...... that is normal for moms. We want to be there with our children all the time but in order for them to grow up independently and well, we have to start letting go.

There is nothing wrong with you being nervous.

My daughter did a week long camp at 4th grade and a week long at 5th grade. She enjoyed her experiences. These were camps where we dropped her off on Sunday and picked her up on Saturday. One was an hour flight + 1 hour drive away. Yes, I was nervous with all the what if's but everything was fine.

My daughter is 15 and just this past weekend, she left on Fri am with her school orchestra and did not return home until late Sunday night. I was thrilled for her experience but of course, I was nervous...she was on a bus for 5 hrs each way, new place, lots to do.

In the end, she had a great time again and all went well.

Don't deny your daughter some wonderful memories and experiences due to your nerves. I know it is hard but it helps them grow up.

My daughter is in 3rd grade and just turned 9. She went to our local GS day camp last year for the first time and she LOVED it. We know about 6 other girls who went to the same camp but were in other groups and they all loved it too. Before camp even ended last year, they were all talking about signing up again for this coming summer. And I know that the camp near us is extremely popular. They always get more applicants than there are openings and they have to do a lottery to see who actually gets in the camp.

Our daughter first went to sleep away camp at the end of her 3rd grade year, she was 8. She went with a classmate and they were there for 3 weeks. She was also 3 hours away. (her classmates father died 2 weeks before camp started.. He had cancer and so none of us was surprised, but a little worried about how it would affect them, they ended up doing great)

She did fine, I thought my husband would have a stroke. I just tried to keep him busy. We wrote letters and she sent pre -addressed post cards back to us. We knew that she needed and wanted this experience, so we just held it together as best we could. It was quiet without her, but she really was kept so busy, that she said she "hardly had any homesickness". It gave her lots of self confidence.

She is going to do great, you just need to remember your good times and great memories. How fortunate she is to be able to experience these extras. So many children will never have these opportunities.
I am sending you strength.

If it were me I would wait until she was older. She is still vulnerable.

This is not the same world it was 30 years ago. Here is my thought process with my kids, if I wouldn't let them go to the store alone or be out in the world alone, I wouldn't send them on a "chaparoned" trip with "professionals" alone either. In fact, I would be more leary of chaparoned pay/trips.The only way they go sleep over somewhere now is with people I personally know and trust, and who love her.

We think most adults have brains, but common sense is very uncommon!
I will give you an example of how messed up some "well meaning" adults are: We just moved to a new state and attend a new church. my lovely 13 yr old wanted to attend the advertised "Jr high girls sleepover night" at the woman youth pastor's home. It was suppose to be based around "freindship" and the value of freinds. So we took her and dropped her off. My husband picks up my daughter the next morning, and heres what we hear happened: The group of girls (around 12 of them) ignored my daughter. There was no Bible reading, no prayer. The girls talked about 2 boys all night. The youth leader didn't encourage intermingling or even guide the agenda. At the end of the night, The 12 other girls slept in the front room and the youth pastor lady put my daughter in the far corner of an ajoining family room to sleep - ALONE. And then she went upstairs to bed. My daughter laid there alone in the dark listening from another room to all these girls giggle and have fun for the next two hours.
I will never, never, never, ever, ever, ever, trust anyone with my child again. I wanted to cry hearing what they did to her. My daughter is sweet and soft spoken , which even made me more angry about it all. She didnt need more reasons to get even more shy.
Good luck,
Gail