More Potty Training Advice - Grain Valley,MO

Updated on March 22, 2010
L.B. asks from Grain Valley, MO
8 answers

Hello moms~ I posted a potty training question not too long ago and after all the responses- i agreed with many of you and decided that my daughter was ready for potty training. Last Sunday, just a week ago-we woke up- i literally just told my daughter that she was going to wear big girl underwear and just to let me know when she needed to go potty. I had gotten a sticker chart taht she thought was very cool-she gets a sticker for telling me she has to go, one for sitting on the potty, one for going potty, one for flushing, one for washing her hands, etc-and she puts them on the cart and so on. So the 1st couple days went GREAT-better than i expected. I was off work the 1st two days-so my husband kind of watched out 10 month old so i could be at my 2 1/2 year olds beckoned call. And she only had about 2 accidents the first two days- then i went back to work tuesday and my husband said she had several accidents and was acting weird like she didn't want to go in front of them. Then on wednesday-she goes to Mother's Day Out for about 5 hours and i told them we were training and she had two accidents while there and two more when she got home-and since then it has been like a nightmare. I know she can hold it and i know she can tell me when she needs to go. Sometimes its just she won't ask to go and won't tell me until she has already gone. And we even tried something different when my hubby is home with her- he just sat her down and gave her the toilet paper and told her to tell him when she was done ( she can wipe pretty good by herself if its just pee) but she was still weird about it with him. I thought she would do fine at Mother's DAy Out too becasue there are a couple other kids training too, and she loves her teachers.
My question is this- i know this isn't a matter of really being ready because she did great at first. I think she is just being ornery sometimes and doesn't tell me first and it is really h*** o* my husband because she has even more accidents with him and i am afraid he is about to start putting a diaper back on her. So........do i just hang in there-in case this is a battle of the wills and she just wants to see if i will give in and let her wear diapers again-and know it might get better. Or should i call it quits, give it a few weeks and restart again? Its so frustrating because sometimes she tells me and sometimes she doesnt and i am doing laundry like crazy!

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M.L.

answers from Detroit on

It sounds like she's ready, she just prefers to be trained by you. That's really hard because you aren't always available! My idea is that if she isn't resisting potty training but just having a few accidents, keep going and try to be very consistent with her but nonchalant when she has an accident. If she is resistant and just not wanting to take the initiative, I'd hang it up for a bit and maybe try again if you have a few days where you can be home with her.

Hang in there!
M.

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C.R.

answers from Seattle on

My daughter is like that too, only wanting to go for me. She does okay with her dad while I am out. We have been in underwear for about 2 months now and it definately has been two steps forward, one step back. She went through a phase where she regressed and started having more accidents and it last a couple weeks. I would just be patient and follow her lead. Anytime I started to push my daughter too much she took a step back. As soon as I pretended like I didn't care she started going forward again. I would just clean up the accidents with an okay and business like without drawing too much attention to them and just keep going forward. One thing I have learned is this is a long process that can definately take a lot longer than you expected.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Maybe she's just not ready. We tried to potty train our son at 2y 6m and it was a weekend full of accidents and laundry. After 2 days we stopped. We tried again at 2y 9m and he had 1 accident running to the potty. After that he was completely trained (daytime). He was just "ready". He slept in a diaper until 3y 2m. Maybe give it a break and try again this summer.

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M.B.

answers from Detroit on

Just hang in there she will get better at it. I always took my kids in with me and they seem to learn quicker that way. Some days will be better than others. Just remember it's going to be great when she gets used to it. I also make a big deal when they go on the potty. We sing and dance to make it more fun.

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A.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I am definately not an expert (I have one 2 1/2 yo daughter who we started potty training in Sept, and was able to stop putting her in diapers at night in Dec. I feel very blessed because it went way easier than I thought it would) Everything I've read has said to not go back to diapers once you've moved to underpants.

My understanding is that kids can't/won't always tell you when they have to go. You have to periodically tell them when to go. (and you need to tell them, not ask them)

Often I'll tell my daughter to go potty, and she'll say she doesn't have to, and I'll say something like, "that's ok, just sit on the potty for a minute, and see if there is anything in there". Often, she does have to go, but she just doesn't want to interrupt whatever it is she is doing.

If she is having accidents, then increase the frequency of bringing her to the potty. For example: start off with taking her every hour, and if she can't make it that long, then bring her more frequently until she isn't having accidents between visits.

But, as others have said, accidents will happen for a while even after they are fully "trained".

Good luck! I know it can be stressful, especially if you work outside of the home.

S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Don't quit. Just tell her that 'we' are going to start again going and not being wet and go every 30 min. whether she tells you or not, like in the beginning. I would think if one person was there until completely trained that would be best but if not I guess tell them to do the same with her. That's why mother's day out and day care don't do so well with it as it takes time. A lot of time. I would tell your husband to do the same and stay with her if he has to until she's done and then set the timer and 30 min. later go again until she is trained for good. I set a timer with my grandson and so he knew it was time even if he didn't want to go I could just say well the timer says it's time to try. Reward her like you were and do whatever but don't quit.

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L.S.

answers from New London on

just don't stress about it. It could take 6 months to do this. You just started. There are going to be accidents. My son was potty trained at 20 months but he always wore pull-ups in the car, when we were out visiting friends and at night time. At home he just were pants. When he peed in the potty he big praise and lots of dancing. last summer he started to poop in his pull up again so we bribed him with popsicles and in a couple of days he was back to pooping in the potty. He turns 3 in May and he fully potty trained but sometimes we use pull-ups just in case we can't pull over soon enough when we are on trips. good luck.

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

I would keep going. If you start again, it'll just confuse her. I'm doing the 3 day potty training right now. We're on day 2 (wish me luck!) and the E-book says not to go back.

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