I Feel like My Litter Girl Don't Love Me Any More

Updated on April 30, 2008
S.G. asks from Miami, FL
4 answers

My five year old dauther is telling me all the time know that I love more her litter sister more that her, now is five and her litter sister is six M old. Please help me I thing I'm loosing her
now she wants my husband for everything and nothing to do with me. The baby still needs me so much because she is so litter.

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J.F.

answers from New York on

Please remember that she wll always need her mama- You feel like you are losing her but you must realize it is just because things are difficult for both of you right now and she loves you very much! You are not alone and will get through this phase :) My advice is to , of course, try to make a special time every day to spend just the two of you, but also- You could try to involve her with your care of the baby as well. If she feels needed and appreciated and has a purpose, it could help her feel more secure as a part of your growing family. For example, give her little jobs like handing you clean diapers during changes, holding baby while you read to them, etc...
Another idea is to give her a special activity to do only when you are unavailable to her because of the baby- for example, a basket of art supplies, toys or whatever that she only gets to play with when you are feeding the baby. This should give her a positive feeling about you and her little sister spending time together & make her feel included. Hope this helps! Good luck

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J.R.

answers from Miami on

I went thru this. My son just turned 5 and my baby just turned 1. When I had alone time with my oldest i would/will always tell him "Remember I love you more because you are my 1st." My mother told me not to tell him that but I have to do what ever I need too to make sure he did not feel I loved his brother more since I was spending more time with my yongest.

Now when my baby gets older I will change my tune to I love you both the same but for now I want to make my oldest feel special since my youngest does not really understand what is going on.

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J.K.

answers from Miami on

I'm sorry you feel hurt by her reaction. I'm sure your a wonderful mom.
how about making time to play games with her everyday. Decide on a time of day each day that is just you and her time. I'm sure you will win her love back quickly. She's reaching out to you the only way she knows how....making you feel guilty!
Hope my idea helps and keep me posted.
J.

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S.S.

answers from Miami on

S.,

When I had my 3rd son he was close in age to my 2nd what I would do is the following. When the baby would take a nap or when my husband would come home I would spend time with him. I would give the baby to dad and spend time with the older ones. This way they didn't feel like they were love any less. Dad has to take an active part though.

Good luck.

S.
35 y/o SAHM of 3 boys

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