Fighting Sleep - Wappingers Falls,NY

I highly recommend reading Babywise by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam. I read this before my first child was born and have used the basics of their theory to teach all of my kids (we're now working on teaching our third child who is four weeks old) to fall asleep and sleep soundly in their own beds. It's worked great for us!

Sounds like my first born. She much prefered my arms than anywhere else. I was a SAHM and she was my only so I could and did hold her a lot! But if I really needed to put her down I put her into a pram that I used indoors and would gently rock & roll it until she was really asleep. That was naptime though.

At night she slept in a bassinet until she was 4 months old. She was an active sleeper so I used sleep positioners with her which gave her the comfort or being held. We also would swaddle her. Babies that young do not feel comfortable having so much freedom. They like the close confined feeling of the womb an swaddling simulates that. This didn't mean that she wouldn't still wake, she did. That is what newborn babies do.

Some nights were better than others but one thing you can look forward to is that her this will not last forever. My guess is that she will stop this in another month's time. I agree that she should not sleep in your bed. This means getting up constantly and soothing her. It is hard work.

Good luck.

A.

Have you tried music or other soothing things in and around the crib? Also if he falls asleep in his crib rather than your arms he is more likely to stay there.

hi C.; being a new mom to what sounds like a colicky baby is really, REALLY hard; we are all here to support you. hang in there, it will get better.

i would like to suggest this to you; reconsider having baby sleep in bed with you; in other words, it might be a good idea! co-sleeping is very safe, healthy, and loving, as long as you know what you're doing. look at the Kellymom.com website, and the Dr. Jay Gordon website. please don't blindly accept common misconceptions about something that might really work for you!

if you decide that you really don't want the baby in the bed with you , consider putting him in a Mini Co-Sleeper on his side, propped up with pillows and swaddled. that's what i did with both my children. i kept my older one in bed with me the first 2 weeks and then moved him to the cosleeper swaddled and on his side, and my daughter went into the cosleeper after 3 weeks. with both of them i had it right next to my bed and i slept on my tummy with my arm stretched out over them, through the open side of the cosleeper. it was very soothing for both of us.

using the car to lull the baby is very understandable and i would say do it once in a while when things are impossible; sleep is probably the most important thing you need right now for your own wellbeing. but try other things first, because that's a lot of work for you, to get in and out of the car constantly, and it's not healthy in the long run. i still use the car once in a while for napping my kids when they are both totally fried and can't get into a nap; but not for night time.

i would also suggest trying out the book The No Cry Sleep Solution. and the time-tested Dr. Spocks' Baby and Childcare book for more ideas. also are you nursing? if so, contact your local La Leche League Intl. chapter for help; i nurse my children to sleep and it's never a problem. when they were mature enough (my son at 18 months, my daughter in the last couple weeks,) they became able to go to bed with thier dad alone.

good luck!

J.

When my girl was that little she had trouble being put down too. It took a lot of work trying different methods until she grew out of it. Nothing worked all the time. So I guess I am not that much help. I will tell you we co-slept with her and used a pacifier. We bought little bed that you put in yours, between you and your husband. It worked great for the first three months. She did not sleep really well (in her bed alone all night) until she was 6 months or so. I just don't believe it is best to sleep train babies until they are at least 4 months, not 4 weeks. Keep asking questions if you don't find anything that works.

do you swaddle? if not, it should help him.... alot of babies at this age wake themselves because they move around so much and their movements are jerky.

what about a swing? i know it's not recommended by most, but i had dd nap in a swing for quite awhile... also she had issues with reflux and the recline was better for safety at that point. i honestly don't think that the carseat is a horrible way to let him sleep, as long as it's not all the time!

another idea is to roll up recieving blankets to place next to him... or some other similar tool to make ds feel more secure as if there is someone next to him.

i have heard of many people who let their babies sleep on their tummies... some are more comfortable that way. i would just check on him more often for a bit.

also, is he in your room or his own. dd slept in a bassinet in our room and i highly recommend it... i could respond quickly to her needs (mostly nursing and comfort) and the bed was so small, i think it helped her feel comforted...

HTH

Hi C.,

I had the same type of problem with my son (who is now 13 months old). When he was about 4-6 weeks old, I would get him to sleep in my arms and then lay him down on his back. He would immediately wake up. I finally figured out that he had reflux and gas pains in his tummy. To solve this situation, I did two things.

First, I bought Gripe water (non-alcoholic) for babies. You can buy it online or at a local health food store. It is like mylicon but all natural and just a little more effective for their stomach. The Gripe water says that you can give it to a newborn several times a day. I would noramlly give it to my son just before or right after a feeding.

Second, when I felt comfortable that my son could turn his head on his own (like 8-10 weeks or so), I would put my son to sleep on his stomach. This seemed to solve alot of our issues with sleeping. I know everyone says that it is safer for babies to sleep on their backs. But, if my baby is not sleeping at all (except for in my arms), I was desperate to find a way to get my son to sleep for at least 1 hour by himself.

Good luck with deciding what is best for you. If it makes you feel any better, I remember that my son slept in his carseat for the first 6 weeks. I was so scared that he was not going to be able to breathe properly if he was laying down and not sitting upright. It was unfounded fear because he could breathe just fine. It was me that was afraid.

Remember that it does get better. The first 4 weeks are the hardest. By about 8 weeks, you will probably get your own routine down. By 12 weeks, you will think I can venture out of the house on my own with the baby for an outing. Then, before you know it your new baby will be turning one years old. Take a deep breathe and remember that as long as you are okay your baby will be okay too.

C., my daughter is now 20 months but she certainly was the same way when she was first born, what worked for us was to have her fall asleep in our arms then gently place her in the bassinet with your hands still on the baby so they can feel your warmth, then very very slowly take your hands off - this sometimes took a few minutes and we had to be patient not to stir hir. Also my bassinet rocked and that helped as well although sometimes I just let her take naps in my arms! Babies that small like movement it reminds them of their womb. Have you tried putting her in a swing? Ive heard that works great because the movement mimics the womb, the car, whatever. Good luck and just remember they are so little right now, babies are just acting on their instincts and its their instinct to want to be warm and protected and cuddled my their mama! They are not yet that aware, this comes as they get older and proceed developmentally. Anyways good luck and I also suggest kellymom.come they are great!