Dating Advice... or Just How to Meet People Advice!

I am also a single mommy of two young kids and I know how difficult it is to get out once in awhile. Have you tried those speed dating things? I haven't been to one but I thought they sounded interesting. I also live in Bismarck so if you ever want to get together and take the kids out just send me a message. I have a 6 yr old and a 4 yr old.

For the record, I did meet my husband in a bar, but I realize we are an exception to a rule. Most guys in bars are not looking for marriage; I just lucked out I guess.

Here are some ideas:

A. Church. Many of them have singles groups.
B. There are groups for single parents, which would be kid-friendly and the men you meet there would (obviously) have kids too.
C. Through friends and family. (Have them set you up!)

-J.

Hi J. M.
I am also from the Belcourt area. Several places to start with your children included. 1. Local fund raisers, 2. Churches, 3. Big Birthday Parties, 4. Parents Without Partners-one in Rugby-and don't be embarrassed, it's not what you think, try it. 5. There is always blind dates-but I don't know if you would like that. Let me know how things work out.

I know what you mean about not being the bar type and that is not usually the best way to meet a good man anyway. Do more frequenting of local parks, bike trails, walk the malls, especially with kids and/or pets. You always end up having interesting conversations with people because of things the kids do or say, and many people like asking questions and stories about pets. Go to church. There are some single/divorced guys who go to church. Or their friends and families are at church and are looking for someone nice for there brothers/available family members to date, too. Just go places you and your kids are comfortable being at and get to know some people. The connections will happen in time and you will meet some great people, who will hook you up with a few interesting nights out and new relationship possibilities. It doesn't have to cost you anything and should not necessarily change your lifestyle or take time away from your kids. Smile and be open to fun conversations. You never know what may come of them! D.

Hi J.,
One great place to be is in Church, then you pray for God to bring you a husband of his choice to you. You be patient and wait it will happen in his timing never in ours. In the mean time concentrate on the kids. After they are in bed for the night instead of feeling how lonely you are curl up to a great book, I know one. The bible. and pray for God to take away the lonely feeling you have.

I was single for 20 yrs raising my kids alone because I kept choosing the wrong men. When I finally just said forget it and gave it to the Lord he brought me the most wonderful husband ever. It will happen to you too.

Of course we all need friends and need time away from the kids. I am not sure if you are in Missoula but if you are I wouldn't mind talking to you and getting to know you, and maybe watch your kids while you go to a movie or something. My email is ____@____.com. Email me sometime.

I am a mentor at our church here in Missoula so if you need to talk to someone please email me.

Take care
God Bless
L.

Here are some other ideas. Join a gym that has daycare. You will be working out and feeling better about yourself and be able to meet new people. The YMCA has family night and such. Your son would love that. Also if you get you son in something you will have the chance to meet new people too. Parks are nice and you see dads there with there kids. You can try online dating I have friends that meet on line and are married and it worked out fine. You need to be yourself. And let that shine through. Myspace has a way to search for people in your area. Women men married with kids you name it. you just go to advanced search and WALA. I meet a really good friend in a town we had just moved to. It was hard to make friends. But just putting yourself out there will help.

Hi J.,

Since you are a mom, have you checked out if there is a MOPS or other moms group in your area? You can look for a group in your area at www.mops.org . A wonderful place to meet other moms, you might be able to find a few moms to swap babysitting with!

Also, look for places to volunteer. If you belong to a church, see if there is something there you can get involved with. Vacation bible school is coming up shortly in most churches, you could volunteer there as well. I help with this every year at our church, should be interesting this year as I will be taking my 23 month old. If you don't belong to a church, where ever you take you 6yo, just ask if you could help. I doubt they will turn you down.

I hope you are able to find some great mom friends and also through that I'm sure something will come your way as far as a future mate goes.

I met my husband online. i know i know..lol
it doesn't work for everyone and you have to be very cautious.
especially since you have kids. you wouldn't want to bring anyone around that you weren't totally certain of. well i guess that goes for anyone you meet where ever you meet them..lol duh..
i just mean, when i met my now husband online, we talked online for a week. then finally on the phone. my sister and cousin had a fit when we did set up a date and he came to pick me up at my appt!
i could have been wrong(i wasn't of coure lol) but there are wierdo's out there and you should always meet someone on neutral ground first.
all that is being said only if you are comfortable going that direction. i know a lot of people aren't. it's the same stereotype thet meeting a guy in a bar gets. but with any where you meet someone it's gonna be hit and miss. lol
i agree with the other poster. churches are great. other social events in town. i know plenty who have met people(women friends and male companions) thru their kids schools and activities.

i know what you mean about it being hard to meet just female friends. i have a hard time with that as well.
i belong to a few moms groups/clubs/boards.

it may be harder with two kids but not impossible to meet someone just anywhere. you just have to be open to it, have the right mind set at the time and be in a positive/confident place with in yourself. you will attracked the right guy.
that whole law of attraction thing. you get back what you put out there. so if you are puting out vibes of confidence and openness,,,and your eyese open at all times..lol lol grocery store, hardware store,, kids school and don't hesitate to just strike up a conversation with anyone even if it's for two seconds about your common kids.
Good luck.. you sound like a good mommy:-))

Are you involved in an area church? Many times they'll have a Parents Night out where you drop your kids off at the church and the rest of the parents have a night out. It works like a baby-sitting co-op. for instance our church runs it 9 mos of the year. so we have enough people, that each parent only has to work one night and has 8 "date nights".

Getting involved in a adult sunday school class while you kids are in their class can help you too. or at least open the door.

As far as your friends and watching kids. Be sure that for every time you watch theirs they are recipricating. another Co-op type thing, others you could grow to resent them. Some people decorate popsicle sticks/tongue depressors/or make up tickets that each person gets say 5 that represents a period of time. Each time they use time, they give that person a ticket. When they run out, they they need to be watching in order to earn some back.