Single Mom Ready to Date :)

Updated on June 19, 2008
J.T. asks from Tampa, FL
11 answers

Hey Moms,
I have been a single mom since my daughter was only 4 weeks old, now she is almost 2 years old. I am thinking I might be ready to start dating again, but i definitely dont spend my nights out and dont want to meet someone in a bar. I was just wanting to get the advice of some other moms, I just dont know where to begin. Thank You

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T.C.

answers from Tampa on

lol at the idea of meeting a single man at the church. I would have never though of that. Anyway my sugestion to you would be online dating, and also just not looking. Sometimes when you dont look, you find what you werent looking for. I met my husband that way, I wasnt looking for a relationship, and poof, there he was! I know its got to be hard being a single mother, but I would also sugest when you do find this person keep them away from your daughter until you are sertain he is a keeper. It would break her heart to know someone and watch them walk away from you both. Good luck, and I hope you find someone who will love you and your daughter they way you both should be loved.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.G.

answers from Punta Gorda on

i think the best way men is through other friends or belong to a church. church doesn't always have men that appear to be holier than God; just normal people like you & me

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L.S.

answers from Tampa on

Some bigger churches have singles groups. The only one I know personally of is way down in St. Pete. But I've heard that it's a popular thing in other bigger churches.

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A.C.

answers from Tampa on

I would not discount online dating at all. I'm currently a single mother of a 2-year-old and I do EVERYTHING online. I am currently talking to a man I met online-- not within a dating site, but within an online game-- go figure. We've been talking since March and we spent a weekend together in May. My daughter absolutely loves him, constantly asks to speak to him, and for the first time that I can remember, she actually allowed a man other than her father/grandfather to pick her up and play with her.

Someone said all she encountered online were bums or druggies. I've tried the bar scene, church, the park, and I've encountered just as many of those losers. Start slowly. Know what you want and stick to it. It'll happen. Good luck!

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K.H.

answers from Tampa on

There is not a single good reason, that Church would be a bad idea.

However, I would also attend local events. Ruskin has a "Tomato Festival". Dade City has a "Kumquat Festival". These are much smaller scale, as opposed to getting lost in the realms of the Florida State Fair.

If you have an interest in "Car Racing", there are several good tracks in the area. Citrus County Speedway, Lakeland Drag Strip, EastBay Raceway, Sebring Raceway etc...

If you love to read...go hang out at Borders. Read a Book and sip a decaf.

If you are a Volleyball girl, find a League nearby.

Find a niche or hobby that you enjoy, and why not try to locate a person who enjoys the same?

I met a guy in person, that I met on the net. He was a Psycho Stalker. So, I really wouldn't recommend Online dating...

Whatever you decide, Best of Luck to you.

~K.

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M.L.

answers from Lakeland on

There used to be a group years aga called Parents without partners. We are going back 30 yrs but it was a nation wide org. They had meetings and weekend activities for the parents and kids. A good way to meet friends in your position. I went back then , though I never met a man there That attracted me.I lived out of state at the time but am back in central Fla. now.
http://www.parentswithoutpartners.org/
http://www.parentswithoutpartners.org/chapterfind.asp?Sta...

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J.O.

answers from Tampa on

Try E-Harmony...I know computer dating may seem cheesy to some but let's face it, you're not in a situation where meeting someone will be easy. Nor would I if I was single...One kid and one on the way...I would definately do it. My cousin is doing it and loves it. It's $60 to join and I think per month but it's worth a shot. they will post your picture and your profile info and they match you up with someone in a similar situation and similar values and interests. If you don't like someone, you can just block any future emails...:) Good luck! (Forget the church thing, talk about lame)....I read the other girl's advice...Church doesn't mean people are nice either!!!!

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K.T.

answers from Tampa on

Don't completely discount the internet!! While others may have had bad experiences, I had a great one. I've been married to my husband for 4 years and we met on match.com. We are two completely normal, educated, fun people that just happened to be tired of the bar scene, etc...and found each other online.

I wasn't a single mom at the time (we have a 2 year old now) -- but I know there are people on there that do have kids, etc. Of course, just like with ANY place you meet people (including church) you should be mindful and careful and cautious...but it worked for me. I highly recommend it! You can be as selective and picky as you want, all from the comfort of your own home!

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K.M.

answers from Tampa on

Join various groups that offer things you enjoy doing. I joined a Krewe, a community service group and believe it or not, several business networking groups because they have a lot of social gatherings you meet a lot of new and interesting people. I agree with the poster that said you usually find a great person when you aren't really looking. Just go out with a smile on your face as if you hadn't a care in the world and that alone will attract positive people. Best of luck to you.

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D.I.

answers from Lakeland on

Same here! Single for 5 years and am DEFNITELY ready. Unsure of the online dating; Enjoy an occasional Happy Hour, but not the lifestyle. My mother recommended joining a bowling league... not sure about that either. Please be safe in your journey and best wishes. D., Lakeland

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R.W.

answers from Tampa on

I wouldn't do the computer dating thing. I tried that when I was a single mom. They are either gold diggers, losers, drunks, etc.. At least that is what I found. My husband also tried the computer dating thing and he said the same thing happened to him. We met where I worked. I was working at a truck stop and he cam in for ice. I know the grocery store is a pretty good place to meet someone. Watch what the guy is buying. You can tell if he's single or not. If you are interested ask him to get something off the top shelf for you. That will start up a conversation. If you go to Church that is a good place to meet a decent man, usually. But then not all Church goers are good people either. The park is a great place to meet guys. I used to take my daughters to the park. Always met a lot of guys there. Let your friends and co-workers know you are ready to start dating again. Sometimes a co-worker will do a double date with you. But what ever way you chose to meet a man I would like you to know the safe way for a first date. Don't let him know where you live. Meet him at a resturant. If it doesn't work out then you never have to see him again. But really, there is a good way and a bad way for everyone and everyone is different. You do what you feel comfortable doing, be yourself and flirt a little. Have fun.
Good Luck!

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