Conquering the Bedtime Battle with Very Bright 2 Year Old

IMO, as long as she knows there is a "chance" you will come in--the hysterics will not stop.

Make a picture list of the routine: reads (book picture), brushes teeth (toothbrush picture), gets her a drink (picture of a cup), song (musical note), SLEEP (sleeping child).

Review the list with her during the day. Consult (with her) the list at night as you do the routine.

Is she in a crib? Leave her a sippy of water in the crib--or near the bed and put some soft music on 'repeat' on a CD player in her room.

Then THAT's IT.

You're not being mean, you know her needs are met, you're teaching her a skill she will need her entire life! Sometimes, the parent just has to grasp for sanity! Good luck!

Try reading the Dr. Ferber sleep training book.

Always be firm. 8pm (or whatever) is bedtime. No matter what.

Have a bedtime routine that is the same every night. Light snack (no sugar or juices), bathtime, brush teeth, PJ's, potty, climb in bed for song or story, and then it's "lights out."

When he comes out of his room, put him right back in. No discussion or arguing. Don't even have a conversation or look annoyed. Be boring. Say "no," and lead him back to bed. Do it over and over if you must. He'll get the point.

Also, try to keep TV and house noises to a minimum until he's out. Again, make everything boring. :o)

Good luck!

Sometimes consistency is important - keeping things the same as before baby came. However, in this case, I think it is working against you. Change up bedtime - everything, do things in a different order, move the bed, let her pick out a new toothbrush, ask her what order to do things in a write it down on a chart she can "check off." Let her be the boss within reason. Hopefully, she will get so engaged in doing her new routine, she will forget to be upset.

But yes, you have to be consistent with letting her cry a little. Give her lots of extra attention during the day, and be tough at night. Maybe give her 2 "Mommy Calls" You may call for Mommy twice, but after that, you have to sleep. That sort of thing...

Also maybe let her pick something of your's to sleep with. When my 6 year old was having sleep anxiety, I let her pick out my (favorite) sweatshirt to sleep with. And I let her spray my perfume on it. All the talking in the world was not as effective as doing that. Of course, she still has my favorite shirt :(

So, right now she has developed bad habits. Break the habits by changing up the routine. Let her think she is getting all teh power, when in truth you are still setting the limits.

Great advice so far. I'd also add, 8pm may be too late for her. You may want to shorten the afternoon nap and put her down earlier (at that age, my kids went down at 6pm, no joke!). Sometimes when they get over-tired, bedtime is way worse, and will lead to hysterics.

I couldn't agree more with Denise, your daughter will continue to do this as long as she thinks her requests will be entertained. It's a tough transition period when the new baby comes, but as the parent, you have to draw your line in the sand! Lay out the bedtime routine and stick to it. She won't die of thirst by the morning. I think you will find that after a couple of nights of not entertaining the after-bedtime drama, it will stop altogether. :) Hang in there!

First of all this is prob not anxiety, baby is with mom and she has to go to bed???this is competing with baby for mom's attention. (can Dad take care of baby while you put her to bed? then have baby look at a mobile or sit in swing for two minutes while Dad and Mom both kiss goodnight(all attention of toddler!
What are these demands?? predict what they will be and prepare for every one, If she asks for a blanket, a special stuffed animal, a drink of water, a night light Have them all in her room near her bed. then
Make a picture chart, if she is as bright as you say she is she will understand the chart, diaper, pajamas, brush teeth, two books, three songs, 4 hugs, 5 kisses have her help you guide her through the steps.
Then Super Nanny routine, no more talking! NO interaction no discussion no You need your sleep. My son liked his door open so he could hear the family in the house, she could have door open IF she is not screaming.

The only suggestion I have is the Supernanny method whereby you do the bedtime routine, turn out the lights and walk away. If she gets out of bed, you simply put her back without speaking, without making eye contact, without engaging her in any way. Do that as many times as necessary until she finally stays in bed. If she isn't getting up, just making verbal demands, I suggest you get some earplugs and settle in for the night and completely ignor all of her whining/crying. Right now, she knows that if she keeps it up, you will give in. Unfortunately, that translates to even longer periods of whining, etc., when you are trying to break he habit. You will be in for a couple of long evenings, but once she realizes that it won't do her any good, she will stop. If you have given in after an hour in the past, her little internal clock knows that and she will continue with her shenanigans well past that hour so brace yourself. There is no easy fix - you have to bite the bullet, hang in there and get it done. If you don't do it now, you WILL have to do it later and the longer you wait, the harder it will be. Good luck!