Breastfeeding and Loss of Sex Drive. Is This Normal?

YES, it's normal. And even though YOU aren't "in the mood", you MUST respond to hubby like you are. HE needs physical love to feel loved - that man thing- which is SOOOOO unlike us who just need cuddling. Don't put him off, he needs to feel like you still love, care, need him and I think you've made him wait long enough. Now I can tell you that once it starts, you'll probably get into it too - it just may take a bit longer than it used to. My desire was NILL, but he always made me glad I was a willing participant!!! :)

Yes yes and more yes.

Breastfeeding supressing ovulation and a woman's sex drive in inextricably linked to her fertility. You aren't fertile right now which is why you have no period and no sex drive. Our hormones encourage us to have sex when we are able to become pregnant! I read a study a few years ago that women are also more likely to choose sexy clothes, high heels and go out on the town when they are ovulating! Ha!

My youngest son is 13 months old and I am still breastfeeding him, though we are down to twice a day. I still haven't gotten my period back (haven't had it since 2008!!) but my desire has returned a little bit. Don't discount the fact that you are also tired and stressed from having three little ones to look after, that has a huge impact on sex drive too. I always found that my sex drive got better after the littlest one started sleeping through the night.

As far as how to deal with hubs, encourage him to read the responses you get so that he sees that it is not you. And also, I try to make sure that we do have sex regularly, even if it isn't always "good for both of us". My husband was prepared this time around although it was a major issue after our first son was born. We got through it and things got back to normal, then we had to go and wreck it and have another baby. Ha!

Good Luck! Like ever other baby phase, this too shall pass!

For me the complete lack lasted until mine started eating enough food to delay or skip a nursing, around 8 months. Around the same time I would get my period back and I would notice a HUGE increase in my desire, I guess in direct relation to ovulating again. I think every woman is probably different with this, but that's my story. I tried to make a very concerted effort so my husband did not feel rejected, we had less actual sex, but more sexual activity....focused on him. I have read that this is one reason bf can be fairly effective birth control, if you don't want to have sex, there's no chance you'll get pregnant! LOL

I always told my husband that during those early months, it was his responsibility to get me in the mood. He had to set the time aside, he had to do most of the foreplay, he had to make me want it. If it meant there was going to be sex, he was up for it. And it worked.
I figured if I was keeping the baby alive, it was the least he could do to keep the marriage alive :) Take showers together when possible, spend as much time alone together as you can, even if it means staying up a little later. Keep the spirit of the marriage alive, write notes, whatever you can think of to remind each other this is only temporary and it will get better, he just has to put in more effort right now, he can't expect you to come on to him.

Congratulations on breastfeeding! I always experienced loss of sex drive as they say your body goes "menopausal". I felt bad too, but it is the reality of the situation. With three kids- there is also a lack of energy for sex I think.

Yes. I breastfed both of my kids for a year or so and I didn't get any drive back until several months after finishing breast feeding.

Yep, normal. But the best way to regain is to go ahead and start getting physical whether you feel like it or not. We weaned at around 2 yrs. That's way too long to wait to be healthy for your marriage...just start being romantic...your husband should get the idea...and that would help your desires return.

Yes so normal it is the feeling that baby is attached to you your attending to everyone else's needs that you don't want to be touched noway no how.Your moods changed etc.Are you on BC?I went months without having sex after the births of our 3 children I can literally live the rest of my life sexless

Lisa, yes, this is normal. The hormones needed for breastfeeding take away from your sex drive. Some women have slight drops while others experience complete lack of drive. As to when it comes back, it varies. With my 3 it came back between 14-19 months--when I started ovulating again. Think of it as nature's way of saying your body physically can't handle another pregnancy right now.

unfortunately it is normal =/ lol here is a link that will show you that lots of women go through the same thing...good luck!

http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/sex+drive?utm_campai...

Like everyone has said, it is normal. And I agree that you still must show your husband that, even though you are a mommy of 3, that he is still #1 to you. The more you attend to his needs (willingly and not out of obligation), the more attentive he will be to helping with the kids. It's a wonderful partnership!

What helps is to start thinking of pleasing him during the day. We need to get our minds going before our body gets going... And just enjoy the time with him until everything gets back to "normal."