Birthday Parties for Kids - to Open or Not to Open.

Don't open.
We never did.
We've been to parties where gifts were opened and played with by everyone and things were lost and broken before the party was over.
Also, it was difficult to write thank you notes when everything was all mixed up.
Kids get to play or do what ever activity was planned and then they get a goody bag as they head home.
Opening gifts in private always works well for us.

We never open gifts at the parties for elementary school. It's too boring for the guests. Now when the kids got older, like middle school, and had only a few friends over for a party, they would open gifts because the gifts are usually more personal (at least among the girls) and the givers are eager for the recipient to show off what she got.

I think it's best to open gifts in private. I see very little advantage to opening at the party - it can be embarrassing when there are disparities in "size' of gift etc for the gift givers, I feel it puts people on the spot regarding their gift choice. They didn't give the gift to the party, they gave it to the child, who can open it, appreciate it and send a nice thank you note.

ANd I disagree with pp about judging the motives for having 30 kids at the party. i can think of a lot of reasons you might end up with that large size - from having to invite an entire elementary class (some schools have rules that specify this), which is surely upwards of 20 these days and then adding in requisite family members- you would quickly get to over 30.

I simply cannot see how people think it's rude not to open the gifts at the party. Boggles my mind. But it takes all kinds.

TO me - the party is about the celebration and the chance for the kids to have fun. GIfts need not be a part of either of those aspects and not opening them at the party leaves more time for both of them.

We do not open the gifts at the party. We usually only have 2-3 hours to have fun, and we are usually at a venue, so to take 1/2 hour to make the kids stop playing to watch gifts being opened seems like a waste of time. Especially when the kids are young it is very boring, some kids want to play with the toys, or keep them, or compare who gave the better gift etc. We like to open them later at home, then thank each of the givers personally later.

ETA: Not opening gifts at the party is pretty common here. The kids really do appreciate it that way, especially if it means they can continue having fun instead. We only tend to invite between 6 and 10 guests, so it isn't a case of having too many kids. Parents don't stay, so we don't open gifts so the guests parents can check them out. My kids have never once complained about not watching their friends open gifts or thought that they shouldn't give their friends gifts just because they don't see them open it. That is a bit ridiculous Lillym.

My kids are excited to see their friends recieve a gift that they have picked out for that child. I like seeing the other gifts they have recieved, might be something i might like to buy in the future. Its fun and it teaches good etiquette.

I get what you are saying about 30 gifts and figity kids and kids shoving others out of the way to be able to hand their gift to the bday kid, and trying to keep things straight and trying to Not have things taken out and played with. BUT if those things are happening then the party is too big.

one friend per age of bday kid, turning 8 then you get 8 friends. Passing out invites at school then just do kids of the same sex as yours boys get invited to sons party. Inviting everyone you know so the party is so huge you never actually play with half the kids is just ridiculous.

If you don't want to take the time to open the gifts then your invitation should clearly state NO GIFTS Please!!!!

and your bet your sweet bippy my kids handwrite Thank you notes! texting? maybe Aunt Chrissy but not a classmate's parents.

lol I"m also one to RSVP though too, so why listen to me.

I think opening the gifts is important because that's the only time many of the kids will see the birthday child with the gift they bought.

To me, 30 kids at a party is a just a gift grab, so that's already rude. May as well continue the rudeness and open the gifts in private and send a text message thank you.

Birthday parties should be a small group of the child's closest friends and family. Gifts should be opened at the party, and thank you cards should be hand written by the child.

We don't open gifts at the "kid party" for one simple reason... what kid LIKES watching another child open presents? It's pretty boring if they aren't for you, especially at that age. For that matter... who actually likes it at a bridal shower either? Multiply it by 1000 for young kids.

What we have done is have my son open his gifts at home or after the guests have left (kid party). At the family party, he opens them there, but we don't make an "event" out of it. If the aunts and older folks want to watch, great but we don't pull the kids out of the pool or off the swing set to open them!

Either way. Depends on how many people, how much time, the birthday kid, etc. As a child I hated opening gifts, because I panicked when I was the center of attention. I finally told my parents I didn't want to open gifts at the party. They were fine with it, but I'll warn you, many people think it's rude. I don't personally, but I have met plenty who do.

I think it's fine not to open gifts. My son had a party at age 1 & 2 where we opened gifts. Mostly family and less than a handful of friends were invited. Now, as he is older,I see the other side as better. I noticed that all but one of the parties we went to after the kids were 2, no gifts were opened.

We were at a party for a 5 year old yesterday for 2 1/2 hours. The mom asked me and the other parent of "the classmates" if we really wanted to see our gifts opened or if we were ok if they waited a bit. We both were fine with not having him open gifts that second. They had a blast playing and they just finished eating the birthday cupcake. It was time to head home. I did not think we should be there 3 hours just to see his gifts. Also, the kids were having such a great time playing together it would have been a shame to cut that short just to watch gifts being opened within the scheduled 2 1/2 hours.

First, we usually don't open gifts at the party. When we have. the kids got distracted by the "one perfect gift" and then every other gift just seemed rushed so they could get back to the thing they loved the best, thus seeming rude, when really they were just being normal kids. We open at home, then my kids write thank you cards as we put each one away. I also use that time to "hide" a few of them, so that I can bring one out every few weeks or so, so they have something new to play with.

Secondly, more in response to the other responders than to you, it is very common here for the kids to invite their entire class. We have done the same for both of our kids. Their schools have rules that they can only help facilitate invites if they are for everyone, so we invite all 26 kids, knowing that 10 - 13 or so will come. Add to that their siblings (we always include "Siblings Welcome" on invites), family, neighborhood friends, and so on and 30 gifts is not out of the ordinary for them. I don't see it as being too much or just wanting gifts, etc. When looking at inviting the whole class, if kids are left out, they feel bad when others are talking about the party, plus those 25 kids are the ones who my children socialize with more than anyone else during the week. They are there 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and we are still at the point where they are all "friends". I'm sure as they get older, we will just invite smaller groups to the parties, but right now when they are all friends, why not?? Just my 2 cents. :)

I agree. If he cannot take the time to open them--you have invited too many.

If it's a small party, I had my kids open the presents. It's exciting for all the kids. For a larger party, no.

For 30 gifts, egads. Definitely open them at home. Hopefully you won't lose any tags so that you don't have a gift that you don't know who it came from.

I always helped my children write thank you notes for each gift. At the very least, they signed their name.

HTH!

We open gifts at the party...but I keep our kid's parties small. 5-7 kids or so. Each kid always seems excited to see the birthday child open what they gave them. I know our kids are disappointed when the birthday child does not open their gift. It's really not that big of a deal though. I like having my kids say thank you in person. My daughter is too little (I do it for her) but my son has to write thank you notes afterwards. If he had to write 20-30 thank you notes I think he would explode!

We open gifts because we have family party's.I think when my sons are older,we will still because i think its fun for him to open presents in front of other kids and show his friends what he got.But its hard because of twins wanting to open at the same time!We really don't know/

Around here kids don't usually "invite the class" they pretty much invite their friends so opening gifts is normally okay, and kind of expected and fun, since it's usually about 10 to 12 kids or so.
If it's more than that then NO, we would not open presents at the party, that would be long and boring for everyone except the birthday child.
p.s. I would HATE for my kids to get 30 presents in one day and I have a very large house!!! Talk about overkill...

We were just at a birthday party where they didn't open gifts. My daughter was so disappointed. She was so excited to give her friend her present and watch her open it and then they didn't do it. I actually think that it is rude. Someone went out bought a gift and put thought into it. One of the biggest joys of giving someone a gift is watching them open and seeing their happiness. At almost every kids birthday party I have been to they have opened gifts and from what I can tell they kids were not bored, they were excited to see what their friend got. Obviously these were not long processes, the parent or whomever needs to speed the process along.

If it's just a few kids and a few gifts and the kids are older then it's great fun. I think when the kids are younger it's just a big mess! The kids all push to get in front, they want to snatch and open the toys and usually the birthday kid is not quite old enough to be as gracious as necessary and it's obvious which gifts are liked and which ones are not. This leads to hurt feelings.

It has become a trend NOT to open gifts at the party when the kids are younger than 5th grade. The gift is opened in private and a photo is emailed along with a detailed thank-you. I think my daughter enjoyed that more than watching her friend open up a ton of gifts.

Now that my daughter is older they all open gifts. They are also more gracious.

Open. The kids who brought presents are excited to watch their present being opened, and to see what everyone else brought. Gift opening is part of the birthday party fun.

But I agree with Doris -- if it's 30 kids, presents can be opened later.

We unwrapped gifts but didn't open packages and take them out until afterward. That way there was no chance of parts getting lost or toys getting broken.