Babysitting for a Friend

Ah! I did this with a "friend" and I came home on lunch one day to find my boys looking out of her front windown crying, she was outside talking with the other neighbor, and all of the other kids were playing outside. Seriously. I would NEVER do that again. She got so mad at me for "firing" her that she called the cops on my husband for hugging her. She is a certified nut. But I will never again use neighbors for a regular thing unless I have to. I don't think it's a good idea on any level.

Don't look at it like she is a friend, look at it as a job. Draw up a contract, and call around to see what the going rate for child care is in your area.

Personally, I wouldn't do this. If something goes wrong or either of you decide to back-out it will damage the friendship. This is a big commitment and you may not want to be tied to a baby for a long period of time. You can't look at this as "helping a friend"- it's really entering a business agreement.

IF you decide to do this:
- call around and ask other providers what they charge per day. Average it out and go from there. In our area, most places charge $50 per day or more.
- Decide on set hours and days. Literally get out the calendar and decide which days you will have the baby.
- Build in vacation time for yourself- two weeks per year and all major holidays is the standard, but if you want to have more time in the summer- make that part of the contract.
- Have a "trial period" that lasts for a good month and see how you feel at the end. If it's too much, then don't continue.
- Agree ahead of time on what they will provide vs. what you will provide

I hope this works for both of you.

I have babysat for a friend before and she got really really jealous because I was there to get them off the bus, kiss boo boo's, see the first step, etc...it ended up ruining our friendship. However as long as you both can handle this then I would make sure she knew how much time you expected off a year, giving her plenty of notice if at all possible, a weekly or daily fee...some caregivers cahrge by day, by hour, or by week. Some require vacation time paid. She would have to consider who would watch them when you are sick or have a drs apt...

IMO I would not mix friends and money.

Hmmm...this is tough. You're about to embark on the whole, "Mixing Friends with Money" situation & it almost never ends pretty. I would tread lightly especially at first & see if you're both on the same page not only with the schedule & money, but more importantly with the actual child's care & her expectations of you. It could work out beautifully for both of you, but be prepared for there to be some issues along the way.

I would come up with a contract persay. Something that you would use for ANY parent, not just your friend. Something that puts out expectations that you both will sign.

Expectations of course being things like pay rate, payment due date, what happens if she needs care later than such and such time (extra fees?... For example, she's done with work at 5, but doesn't pick up til 7 and you really want to get back to family life at 5:30). Anything that is in black and white can't come back and bite you. If she has a copy that she signed saying she provides formula, or diapers etc... She can't come back and say that she thought you would provide them. Not to say she would, but with my own experience with friends.. They will use you for what you're worth and more, but it usually comes with a price. For me, it was many evenings babysitting w/o getting paid.

If you treat it like a favor to your friend, it could very easily become just that. If you treat it like a business, you can keep morals from getting crossed. Not to say that even being professional is perfect. It's not.

I personally for my home daycare, I charge $75/week for the 3 days. My sick days and vacation days are free. The parent's still pay if I am available, but they don't bring their kids. Payment is due up front.

Also, if you are planning on doing this from your home... You're only legally allowed up to 3 children (including your own). Which doesn't sound like it's a problem at this time.

Good Luck!

I love my friends & their kids, but there's no way I would commit to that, especially with a newborn. Things can & will get awkward when it comes to mixing business with pleasure - and with the newborn mixed in, it just doesn't seem like a good idea to me.

I deal with my friends four kids in the morning. We're into the third year and so far so good. Sometimes he forget to pay me but other than that it's all good. I just do the gentle reminder like HEY DUMMY, IT'S FRIDAY PAY ME! We've been friends since first grade so it's all good.

I payed a friend to watch my son and it worked out well. We did talk openly and honestly from the start to make sure we were on the same page. For pay we calculated a $25/day rate multiplied by the amount of days I would normally work in a year. Then we divided that amount by 12 so she had a set amount she could expect every month. If she took sick days or vacation days, I didn't have to pay her for those days but if I was sick or took extra leave that wasn't already calculated into the monthly amount I still payed her for those days. We also set dates that I would pay her each month so she knew when to expect her paycheck. When it came to discipline we were on the same page already and she and I also had similar views regarding schedules and feeding so that was another hurdle we didn't have to worry about. The one thing I would say is if you do this, don't ever let her know if you saw her baby do something first. Even if you saw the first roll over, sit up, steps, etc, don't tell her and be excited for her when she tells you when she sees her baby do those things.

Hi, I babysat for an 8-month-old baby. The mom was a friend from preschool, whose husband was pastor there. She offered me $2.50 an hour (this was 1999)...and I wish I had asked for more money. The job was over (not sure if it was because I got a full-time job or if it was just for the summer!) pretty soon, so vacation never came up.

I guess if I were doing it again, I'd google rates in the area. I'd be reluctant if it had been a close friend, because things do come up that you don't expect as Mom2KCK wrote...can go both ways :(

My daughter currently gets $8/hr for babysitting here in TX, and I also paid that amount/hr to an agency in St Louis when I hired a nanny for my daughter when she was young.
Good luck!
p.s. after reading the others, I realize you would be charging by the week (duh!). Obviously I don't have that much experience with this. :)

I agree with other posts that this is a little scary. As far as the terms of the agreement, use whatever is "market rate". And I strongly recommend having a trial period of 4 or 6 weeks. Set a specific amount of time to try it out, meet again and discuss whether this is working. Map this trial out so that both of you understand that this is just a trial, there is no obligation to continue following the trial, and that changes to pay, hours, vacation time will likely be made if the agreement is renewed.