Advice on Where to Send Teen Daughter for Middle School

Only two suggestions. First, is the larger school a good school for her? If so, I would sit down with her and talk through the decision and all the options and considerations. Use it as a learning experience for her - as she will need to make many more decisions to come!

If the larger school isn't one that you feel comfortable with academically/environmentally, I would explain why she will be going to the charter school - it's in her best interest long term. Then plan on ways to continue her interaction with her friends. My stepdaughter has a friend (for several years now) that do NOT go to the same school.

Good luck.

Hi Karen, it sounds like you had made your decision based on well thought out factors. And your daughter has possibly changed her mind on impulsive, emotional factors. Totally normal for her, but probably not the best way to go at this decision. If you were comfortable with your decision, and have been for a while, I don't see any reason to question it.

That said, I would make sure to really 'hear' your daughter's concerns and not minimize them by saying she is being emotional or that friends change, etc. To her, the friendship piece is huge and a very big deal. I would hear her concerns, and help her figure out how to problem-solve. "it's importnat for you to stay close with these girls, how can we do that?" helping her brainstorm about phone calls, arranging time together, etc. could help her feel that you understand the importance of this and can help her come up with solutions. But to change the course of her academics is probably not wise.

Good luck!

We have two girls, 15 and 13, and it is an important time for friends at this age. However, I have noticed from experience with our girls, that when they have and "internal" feeling about something they should go with it. When they don't they always regret it down the road. And, sometimes if you're lucky they will tell you, "I'm sorry I didn't take your suggestion!"

It's natural for your daughter to toss different ideas around because it helps her make decisions. But, being 11 or 12 years old is not old enough to make very many decisions on her own. If she's desired to attend this school for a long time then it is probably the best place for her. If she makes friends easily then she will do so at the charter school without any problems.

We had our children in a charter school for most of their elementary years and they loved it. They wanted to attend a core knowledge school through the 8th grade, but we couldn't get them in when we moved to this area. However, they have done just fine in the regular schools.

Each family is unique and we have to make decisions according to what we believe is best.

So, good luck and the best to you.

Go with the Charter school. It's a long story on where I'm coming from, I won't bore you with the deets...the more academically rigorous, the smaller, the better. She can see friends during breaks, summers and after school. She can't get a good education just anywhere. GL!