20 answers

Sex Drive During Pregnancy

This is a personal question, so I apologize ahead of time. I'm 7 months pregnant with my first baby and I have no sex drive--nothing, no desires, no thoughts, nothing. This has worried me a bit so my husbandand I attempted to give it a go the other night and, well, my "lower regions" didn't want anything to do with it. Has anyone else had this experience?

Additionally, I've noticed that things are a bit swollen down there and sometimes a bit sore. My midwife says this is "normal" but I really wanted to know if anyone else had swollen and sore "parts" down there?

Thanks in advance. H.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thanks to everyone for the support and help. Sometimes it's just nice to know that you aren't the only one with a problem. It's very reassuring to know that sex drive varies throughout pregnancy and my "lack" of drive isn't abnormal. Though one thing I didn't note is that my husband is perfectly fine with not having sex (other things are done to keep him satisfied), which it's really nice not to have him content with us going without.

Thanks again to everyone, you've really made me feel more comfortable with this time in our lives!

H.

Featured Answers

I wouldn't worry about it. For some women that's how the hormones work, for others it increases their sex drive. I have absolutely no sex drive when I am pregnant. Being on the pill also suppressed my sex drive. As for being swollen, there is an increase of blood flow to that area in pregnancy that could make it feel swollen.

1 mom found this helpful

H., all is normal, one thing that help me was to have sex at night, that way I didn't have to walk around all day feeling REALLY swollen. I would have the night to go back down to normal swelling. Also I scheduled 2 days a week that we would be intimate, that way I had all day to prepare and think about it and be ready. (I didn't tell him though:) )
Good luck
E.

More Answers

Your'e normal.
I was like that too.
But in the last trimester, I got sex drive overdrive.
But it would make me get contractions... so I stopped.

If anything, you can do other things for your husband.. without intercourse. That can be a happy medium... :)

As for the swelling.. I don't know. But I know that when pregnant, the blood circulation changes and the amount of blood circulating increases....
try asking your Ob/GYN.
That is what I would do... just to rule out any medical concerns.
That a midwife may not know about.

All the best,
Susan

1 mom found this helpful

During pregnancy our hormones are totally confused and sometimes we can't get enough sex and other times we have no desire. It is normal by all means. I would not worry about it because everything can change in a split second. Everyone get swollen parts. I can remember hurting and then calling the doctor and saying, "I know something is falling out!" LOL LOL

1 mom found this helpful

I wouldn't worry about it. For some women that's how the hormones work, for others it increases their sex drive. I have absolutely no sex drive when I am pregnant. Being on the pill also suppressed my sex drive. As for being swollen, there is an increase of blood flow to that area in pregnancy that could make it feel swollen.

1 mom found this helpful

I was like that. In fact, it hurt, a lot. We didn't do it for several months. Of course I helped to satisfy my husband.

I went through that with both my pregnancies. It's totally normal.

I think it's normal. It's your body turning off ALL sex drive hormones because it knows a baby is coming. And once you have the baby (and if you breastfeed) expect your sex drive to STAY non existent because again, your body knows its already taking care of ONE human being and doesn't want another one anytime soon!
Its to make sure you have ample time to nurture and care for your little one. I know its hard from the hubby, but tell him things will brighten up again and you'll be your usually randy self. :)
Good luck, and congratulations!

H.,

You are normal. I has no sex drive at all when I was pregnant. None. The idea was aweful. Luckly my hubby was very understanding and gave me my space. Everything is back to normal now, except we have a happy healthy 21 month old. With all the hormone changes you are having as well as being physicaly uncomfortable all the time, it is not surprizing you are not intrested in sex. :)

H.,

Apparently, as many have said, it's a normal thing. I know I'm chiming in late on this. Be grateful that you have a significant other in your life. I can share from experience, it's not fun being pregnant without one. I had a healthy libido before being pregnant. During my pregnancy, I was ready "to go" all the time, but wasn't involved w/ the father any longer. And, he lived an hour a way. For me, it was quite frustrating.

If and when the mood strikes. Take advantage of it. And know it won't be harmful to you of the baby (well, within reason). After baby comes. It's a whole other story. You may wonder, for a long while, if you'll ever get enough sleep and energy to be intimate. Good luck to you both. Congratulations!!!

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