Boys Close in Age - When to Put Them in the Same Room?

Updated on June 01, 2011
S.W. asks from Little Elm, TX
14 answers

Hi ladies!
I read this site all the time, I have learned so much from all of you!

My question is this...I have a 1 year old boy and another one on the way, due in August. They will be 15 months apart. Our plan is to have them in the same room and use the 2nd room as a playroom (the 2 rooms are joined by a jack n jill bathroom). The new baby will be in our room for the first few weeks (I think with my 1 year old he was in our room for 3 weeks). So do I put them in the same room right after that or do I wait until baby #2 is sleeping through the night? My 1 yr old sleeps great, from 7:30p-7:30a, and I don't want to mess up his sleep. If you have a similar situation, did you just put them together and the older got used to it? Or is it better to keep them separate until the youngest is sleeping through the night?

Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for your input! I guess we will just have to see how it goes after baby #2 gets here. Although my 1 yr old is a great night sleeper and napper, he is a LIGHT sleeper, so I think I am leaning towards waiting until the youngest is sleeping through the night. The 1 yr old started sleeping 8 hours per night around 3-4 months, and 12 hours a night around 5-6 months. Here's hoping his little brother does the same!

Thanks again for your suggestions...I'll be referring back to this post in August!

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

To be honest I would put them in separate rooms. The baby isn't going to be able to play in the play room due to the toys not being age appropriate.

You will be constantly having to sit in the room and grab toys out of the babies mouth. Or the older child won't be able to have hot wheels cars, legos, blocks, any toy that will fit through a toilet paper roll, clear until the baby is over 3 years old and NOT putting anything in his mouth. My 4 yr. old still has some toys he can't play with due to them going straight to his mouth.

The bay will want to crawl and play with toys that appeal to him. He needs a space that is totally baby proof. That seriously limits the toys the older boy can even have in his room. That just doesn't seem right to me. So that's why I say keep their rooms separate.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'd advise keeping them separate at least until the younger one is sleeping well throughout the night. You can then develop a routine where you put him down to sleep first, and then your older son.

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L.P.

answers from Pittsfield on

I kept mine separate because I was afraid of having 2 awake @ 3am, but I have no real experience of having had them together that young to know if the baby would have actually awakened the older one.
Congratulations!!!!!!!

B.B.

answers from Dallas on

My girls are 13 months apart, and I'm not sure how long we kept our youngest in our room, but I think it was a couple of months, until she was to big for the bassinet. But then they shared a room, and have been ever since, my oldest never woke up during the night time cries, but she was used to sleeping during noise. Like we would take her to church and it's a "southern babtist church" so it was loud, and she would fall asleep, so we knew she would be good. You know your son, so if he sleeps real light, then you might want to keep them separate till the baby sleeps through the night, good night, and congratulations..

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R.H.

answers from Tyler on

Hi S. -

This is exactly what we did with our girls - they are 19 months apart. They are currently one and 2.5 years old. I kept the youngest in our room for a while simply b/c she was not a good sleeper and it took her a while to sleep through the night. I was so paranoid about ruining my older daughters sleep habits b/c she was an awesome sleeper. It turns out I had nothing to worry about. When we finally put them in the same room - at 8 mths old - the younger never bothered my older. It took a good two weeks before I relaxed and just let my littlest figure out how to put herself to sleep and stop using me as a crutch. My oldest never once woke up during that period. Naps were a lot more interesting. The best advice I got was: Make a decision and stick to it - once you put them in the same room, don't give up. They have to get use to each other and their sounds, etc. And if you give up and move the smaller out, he will know that if he hollars long enough, etc - you will eventually come give him what he wants, which will be to sleep with you. Anyway - we are doing great on our shared rooms now - and our play room is awesome! Good luck!

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M.P.

answers from Dallas on

I have to agree with Brittany and Sheri on this one. I have 3 girls...the first two are 15 months apart and between the second and third are 21 months. You probably won't leave your baby unsupervised anywhere you put him so I don't know that separating the toys is a big necessity or even entirely possible. Just my opinion and experience though! Congratulations. Having them close together brings challenges but also great reward!!! (Oh, and all 3 of mine share a room by choice. Now that my oldest is in school, she has her own room...but as soon as summer hits, she wants back in with her sisters!)

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

My older two boys are 15 months apart. I put them into the same room when the younger of the two was about 8 months old. I would put the older one in bed and then feed and rock the baby and then put him into bed. by the time he was a year old they were both sleeping from about 8pm till 7 the next morning. they will get used to each other. when they are both out of the crib be prepared to go in and find them in the same bed lol.

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T.Z.

answers from Dallas on

I by no means have the answer! But my boys are 18 months apart and really are best friends at 2.5 and 4...I am not considering putting them in the same room until they are in school and have to have the same schedules!! It isn't worth it to me to have them playing around all night...plus I think they need some place to separate from each other since they are around each other ALL DAY. By no means do i think this is the BEST, but it is best for us now.

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L.D.

answers from Dallas on

My children are 20 months apart, and I put my daughter in with my son when she was about 7 months old. She is now 17 months and still does not reliably sleep through the night, but my son is used to her and sleeps through her crying.

Ditto for her. She goes to bed first, and sleeps through rocking, and also crying fits my son has when he doesnt want to go to bed.

I think they just get used to each other. It took less than a week. The baby may bother the 1 year old at first, but if he is a good sleeper he'll get back to that quickly.

Also, its SUPER fun to have them in the same room. Some nights we can hear my son talking to my daughter, and her laughing at him.

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

I worried about having our girls (3 years apart) sharing a room, but we've really had no issues. Our youngest was in our room for the first 3-4 weeks, then we moved her into DH's home office, thinking we'd keep her there until she was sleeping through the night. Miraculously, she did this most of the time starting at 10 weeks (it took big sister 7 mos!). We still weren't going to push it--older sister knew that they would share a room, the crib was set up and we'd all play in there, but little sister was still sleeping overnight in dad's office. At about 11 weeks, big sister started asking if little sister could move in with her. We figured we'd give it a try, and have had no problems since. Last night, little sister (now 13 months) was up screaming with teething at 3am, and big sister slept right through it. We did move big sister into our room for a couple of nights when little sister had croup, and the coughing made it hard for her to sleep, but otherwise, it's all good. They adjust. Sharing is good. And honestly, a generation ago, who in the world had their own room? That's only a luxury people can even consider now that so many have multiple bedrooms and reliable birth control, lol! It will all be fine--good luck!

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

Hey- you never know. If you're older one is a good sleeper, he might also be a deep sleeper. We are sleep-training my 15 mon old and 5 yr old big brother is in the next room. One night 15 mon old cried and screamed for 45 minutes and big brother slept right through.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

My boys are 13 mos and 21 mos apart. I also have a stepson that is 3.5 years older than my first son. When my youngest was born, I tried to pit the two boys that are 13 mos apart in a room together...they were 2 and 3. It lasted a couple of months. My 2 year old would constantly wake up the 3 year old and it was a bad situation. We have a 4 bdrm house, so we decided to convert our dining room (it has doors) into a bdrm for my stepson and that way, each of the 4 boys has his own room. For us, this was the best way to go. They all need space from each other and I'm sure that will be more important as they get older. I wouldn't devote a room to toys. I would let each boy have their own room and store their own toys in their rooms. If they don't have to share, I wouldn't make them do it IMO.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

my two boys shared a room from day 1 (granted they are 2.5 years apart). Neither had any issues sleeping and my older one is a more sound sleeper, in my opinion, as a result.

I would try it out since that is how the house is set up now and if you are finding some issues or problems with the co-habitation, then seperate them, but I'd give it a good three months.

Congratulations and best of luck!

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L.P.

answers from Dallas on

Wait until #2 is sleeping through the night. My oldest was on a wonderful schedule and everything got ruined, in the sleep department, when #2 arrived. BTW, our #2 is 3 and still wakes up during the night. I realize he is a bit odd though. Good Luck!

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