Toddler Plays Instead of Napping

Updated on February 11, 2009
K.Y. asks from Buena Vista, CO
12 answers

My 2 1/2 yr old toddler now plays instead of napping. He is all over the place, turning the light on, all the books off the bookshelf, into the closet and everywhere except in his bed. If I hold him firmly so that he can't get down and play, he cries for a bit and then falls asleep, sometimes for 2 hours and then still goes to sleep at about 8 pm for the night (he wakes up between 6.30 & 7 am). We follow a nap time routine that is similar to his bedtime routine which includes reading for about 15 mins. I have tried putting him down to nap earlier and later and it doesn't seem to make a difference. Any advice or suggestions would be helpful. Thanks so much.

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone for your very helpful comments and suggestions. I am planning on trying the "quiet time" routine for a while and am hoping he won't tear his room apart during the process! Another suggestion I received was to remove the items from his room when he messes with them. It really helps to know that so many Mother's go through this and that it is not just my child!! Thanks again to everyone who responded to my request.

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J.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

2 1/2 is such a hard transition stage from naps to no naps. My son went through stages from 2 1/2 to 3 of taking naps regularly and then not taking them. It's hard because they get so tired. I would continue to try holding him if he falls asleep quickly if you feel he still really needs naps. Also, maybe you could try a treat nap jar. If he stays in his bed, without getting out, then he gets the treat. If he gets up even once he does not recieve any reward. Just an idea.

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K.D.

answers from Denver on

We insist on a rest time. One or two books is allowed. No changing books. This worked/s well for both our boys at this age, and still sometimes works for our 5 yo. At the least you get quiet time and rest. Usually you also get sleep. GL!

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R.K.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Honestly, I would not make a big deal about this. :)

Everyone gets stuck in the idea that children MUST do this or that, but really, unless you can actually see a significant difference in your son with a nap versus without, let him stay awake.

Instead of "NAP" time, create quiet time. Learning how to play quietly is also important. Having time to one's self is important, too. And, lets face it, Nap-time is just as much for Mom if--not more--because we realize quiet time is important for US.

Now, some people just tell their children to be in their rooms for a certain length of time. I have done that, too. I have, with older children, told them they could play as long as they wanted but that they couldn't come out of the bedroom until they've been asleep for a long time. (I said long time because they were little and didn't know how to tell time, PLUS they often tried to pretend sleep)

I'm not saying to let your children lead you by the nose, but, realizing your child's needs are different (even when yours are the same)is a good thing--and important thing, and allowing for changes while fostering growth and keeping your boundaries is wise.

It'll all work out...

1 mom found this helpful
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J.L.

answers from Provo on

Don't give up. My daughter went through the same thing, luckily it was when I was working and my husband was home, so he dealt with it. Consistency is the key and it pays off in the end. She naps wonderfully for me now, no problems usually unless I put her down too early. She's turning 3 and I fully intend on having her nap until at least kindergarten. I don't think it will be a problem. She still needs it and would be a nightmare without it, and still goes to bed okay. Just keep putting him back to bed, and if he has something special he likes to take with him to bed, take it away until he stays in bed. I also have told her she won't be able to do anything fun until she takes a nap. Whatever it takes, but don't give up the nap. Especially if you feel he needs it. It will be better for both of you.

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M.M.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Hi,

I also have a 2 1/2 year old boy and occasionally he has gone through phases where we put him down for his nap and close the door and think he's gone to bed, but then 5 minutes later I can hear him and I check on him and he's sitting reading books on the floor. Some people suggested to me that maybe he was done with naps, but I knew he wasn't because when he did sleep, he'd sleep for like 3 hours. What I learned was to just put him back in bed every time. Timeouts totally didn't work, because that meant he got to get out of bed for longer. A couple times he even requested a timeout! So as a consequence we would take away doggie, who he loves. He would cry at the door for a little bit and I would go back in and tell him if wanted to keep his blankie that he had to stay in bed and I'd help him back in bed and tell him he could have doggie when he woke up. This being said, there's a slight chance he's done with naps, but I'd try something like this first, because I know how valuable those naps are for getting things done and having a break!

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R.M.

answers from Salt Lake City on

My son used to be just like that, very active and all over the place. I finally gave up naps and called it quiet time. If he would play quietly and not make a mess he could stay up and would eventually fall asleep among his toys. The other thing I did was to put in his favorite video and let him watch that during quiet time which later became TV time. It kept him quiet and settled enough that he didn't get too tired and onrey later in the day. Some kids just don't seem to need naps. You could also save some special toys for quiet time as a reward for not tearing apart his room.

I'm a working Mom with two grown children and a 7 month granddaughter I am helping to raise.

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S.P.

answers from Great Falls on

Some kids cut out naps early. If you can handle it, let him be up but make sure he knows to be quiet. and that he can't leave the room. give him a small toy to play with in bed and let it go. i still use quiet time for the boys and they are 13 and 9. they use it to destress from their day and helps them go to sleep a lot better. Good luck!!!!

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C.C.

answers from Denver on

Hi K. - sounds just like my house! My toddler is same age and also transitioning out of naps. They still need a nap but there is too much world to miss! It's definitely harder to maintain a routine that way.

my little guy sometimes falls asleep on the babysitters couch and now he won't nap up in his bedroom anymore. I try to give hime some "quiet time" every day at 2:00 where all the toys get put away, he can watch a Baby Einstein video and my guy rests on the couch with his lovies and his blanket. He only naps 1-3 times a week anymore

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M.R.

answers from Provo on

you could try darkening a room as much as possible, lay down next to him, maybe rub his back or stroke his hair, and play soft music in the back ground...works for my 3 and 4 year olds

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S.C.

answers from Fort Collins on

Sounds to me, like you are just dealing with a toddler. Both of my daughters went through this phase, and the youngest, 3, is still doing it. Eventually, they go back to the routine. JUST DON'T CHANGE IT! With our oldest, now 8, we let go of the routine, and paid the price of a very tired and cranky kiddo when it became evening time. And then she started taking naps again, about age 4. Don't know why kiddos do this, but they just ssem to get this little independant mind going, and that they can do whatever they want. We just have to learn that they are not in charge, we are!

Namaste

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C.H.

answers from Wichita on

I know how you feel! I am going through the same thing. It started to be so frustrating and such a struggle for me, that I sort of gave up. I just make sure he stays in his room for a few hours to play if he wants so that I can still have some time for myself during the day. It's more calm now for the both of us... and every few days he does fall asleep. My boys are like night and day.... my 4 year old still takes naps almost every day! My 2 year old has never been much of a sleeper so we figured he would give up naps way earlier than our oldest. You obviously have to push bedtime way back. Sometimes he goes to bed then as early as 6 pm. Good luck to you!!! :]

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D.S.

answers from Grand Junction on

Just stop his naps. My boy stopped at around 2 1/2 when my daughter was born. With my daughter I don't think she really got the naps I wanted her to have, so I stopped her naps at around 1 1/2. Its not worth the fight and you really shouldn't have to hold him down to do what you want him to do. I'm guilty too I did it a few times myself, but I decided that I'm the one who wanted him to take a nap when he wasn't tired. Just make nap time a time for him to play quietly in his room or help you clean the house. Give him a duster and have him dust. They love helping at that age. Good Luck

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