Thumb Sucking at 17 Months Old - First Time Mom

Updated on April 11, 2010
A.M. asks from Jonesboro, AR
9 answers

My daughter started sucking her thumb at about age 5 or 6 months and does it ONLY when she is tired and goes to sleep. So I always know that is a sign she is tired. But is thumb sucking just a thing some babies do and some don't or does it mean there is some underlying reason for security. I am a first time mom and want to make sure she is not doing it for a security reason. I want to meet all her needs and don't want her to feel insecure and unsafe and find that comfort in sucking her thumb. It would break my heart. But I am a good mother but I have suffered from a terrible case of PPD so the bonding between us was delayed for about 8 months. Since then we have slowly started to have the mother-daughter bond that I was supposed to provide her at birth but was mentally incapable because of the PPD and I am still having issues with it. I just want to raise a well-rounded poitive and highly self esteemed child so she won't grow up the way I did. I do find myself always worrying too much about certain behaviors she shows. It brings on great guilt and it may just be a minor display of her appropriate age and I think I've done something wrong. I've got to quit worrying so much and be more layed back. However witha critical mother and belittling husband,it hard not to second guess myself sometimes. I know I'm probably overreacting.

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Featured Answers

C.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

it's totally normal. My daughter started when she was just 1 day old, and she is 5 now and still does it, but only when she is really tired. My son started when he was a couple months old, and he is 2 now and still does it.

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

Short answer- This is normal. It's not a cry for help. She just likes to suck her thumb to fall asleep. My 3 y.o. boy has a blankie. He likes to rub it when he falls asleep. Totally normal.
Long answer- I have read some of your previous posts. My heart truly goes out to you and your predicament. I really hope that you go to your care provider and tell them that the ppd medication isn't working. You (and I don't know you, so don't be insulted) sound very overwhelmed. I also suffered from ppd. I had to go through several different meds before I found one that truly worked. They don't all work the same and your body may not be processing them correctly. I know that you are worried, but your worry is out of whack with reality here. I hope that you can get up the courage to seek further help.

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L.F.

answers from Chicago on

Perfectly normal! My daughter (firstborn) never took a pacifier and never sucked her thumb. My son, however, started sucking his thumb within a few hours of birth! He is about 20 months old, and he still sucks his thumb if he is tired or just wants to cuddle. I don't see it as him being insecure. And it has nothing to do with hunger. I nursed both of my children on demand, and initially, I thought maybe since he was sucking his thumb, he wanted to nurse. Nope. He just wanted the thumb. I'm sure your daughter is fine and just likes to suck her thumb :-)

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R.D.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes you are overreacting. Your daughter is fine. Some babies suck their thumbs just to passify themselves. I know that you didn't have a great upbringing and of course your hubby took advantage of that as well. Please start thinking more on the positive side of yourself. Yes you are still having minor issues but you pulled through it which is wonderful. I am proud of you.
You are wanting to give your child what you didn't have and there is nothing wrong with that just don't be over protective. Don't feel upset around her or jittery because she will feel exactly what your feeling. If your upset about something you will find that she won't go to sleep, or she'll give you a hard time during the day. Something always happens and its because she feels you. Remember you gave birth to her, she knew you while you were pregnant and she still does. Don't second guess yourself, thats a no no, thats when you make mistakes. Take a long look in that looking glass and say to yourself "I am a good person, I'm caring,loving and beautiful" try this every morning and believe you/me it really does give you a wonderful feeling and nobody can take that away from you. You are a wonderful and caring person or you wouldn't be writing and asking advice. You want the best for yourself and your daughter. Like I said she will be fine and so will you when you stop and think of all the good in you. You are perfect, just the way you are. No more worrying, we all do the best we can and how we feel inside. Your daughter thinks your beautiful and she loves her mommy and always will. Not to worry. Take care of the two of you, your on the road to a very healthyr relationship. You can do it!! :-)

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

I have two children. The first one was an avid thumb-sucker. The second one showed zero interest.
Did you know that some babies begin sucking their thumbs even in the womb? It's true!

You can rest assured that your baby wanting to suck her thumb is not a result of anything you've done wrong. It's just something she has found she can do to comfort herself when she's tired. It's perfectly normal.

My daughter who was a thumb-sucker is a very intelligent, healthy, independent but very affectionate and successful adult who will be 24 in October. She turned out just fine.
I understand your nervousness, but try not to be too h*** o* yourself, okay?
Your baby loves you very much!

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L.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Some kids suck thumbs and some kids don't. Usually they start because they are teething and it feels better to suck or chew. And then it just becomes a habit they hang onto after teething. Thumb sucking is definitely not a sign of good or bad parenting. It's just part of being a baby.
Don't be so h*** o* yourself! You're doing fine!
Good luck!

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D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

RELAX my 23 month old still sucks his thumb but is slowly outgrowing it. babies have a need to suck and dont let your mom or husband tell you any diffrent. it helps develop their mouth for other things like drinking out of a straw. my oldest didn't suck his thumb and it took him longer to drink out of a straw than his little brother that does suck his thumb.my mom asked me one time why I didnt give him a pacifier instead of letting him suck his thumb all of her kids were pacifier babies. and I told her if i did give him one he would take it out and suck his thumb anyway she never questioned it again. I would not worry about it till they are 3 then I would be finding out how to break them of it. this she will most likely outgreow.

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V.G.

answers from Little Rock on

I think it is perfectly normal. As far as I can tell, it is not a security issue, just a passification. My 3 yr old son started sniffing his blanket at about six months. And he still does, to go to sleep he has a favorite blanky and he sniffs it and falls asleep.

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W.Q.

answers from Tulsa on

Thumb sucking is very natural...but can get out of control if not stopped early enough. I don't think you have a problem at 17 months yet...but you might want to watch her and see if she increases in intensity or starts to slack off. You can always talk to her pediatrician or even check out webmd.com or someplace like that where you can get advice from professionals. Just know that you are not lone. Babies start sucking their thumbs in the womb.
I was a thumb sucker until I was almost 7...and I came from a very dysfunctional home so it probably had a lot to do with stress and fear.
There are products on the market that you can use to wean her off the thumb sucking if it really starts to bother you...my mom used Tabasco Sauce on my thumb....I don't think it worked...I LOVE hot sauce! LOL
Good luck.

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