Okay so I was married two and a half weeks ago. After the wedding I had to prepare a billion reports, do as much as possible to push out the payroll after I left for my honeymoon. Then I had the honeymoon and got back Monday. Now I am trying to dig out from the mess at work before pushing out this weeks payroll.
So I am reading about the rudeness of people to not get those darn thank you notes out right away. Well I am sorry but I for one do not write form letters. No thanks for the $$$, I want them to know what we have or will spend it on, what pleasure it has brought or will bring in our lives. Each note personalized to what aspect will bring the giver the most pleasure. After all I appreciate the gifts, even though I asked for none....yeah if y'all want a lot of gifts tell them no gifts, that sure backfired.
I digress....
So what do you prefer? A generic form letter, like that which a five year old can produce in about five minutes or something that makes you feel as special as the gift you picked out for the person?
I would really love to know because if people just want generic thanks I will get those puppies out tonight! :p
I have very nice pens and I would consider typed on a computer more rude than not sending them at all. Even if everyone here said generic I couldn't do that. I am that gift person who is both thoughtful and generous. I would do that regardless of the thank you note but I love the personal thank you notes. I hate writing them, hate! but I love composing them. I would have Troy do the writing but then no one could read the beautiful words I came up with. :p
I will get them out and it will be fun. Maybe I will make Troy write a few, just for laughs. We can call it a bonding moment.
Alright! why didn't anyone point out I used right instead of write! :( :p
I definitely prefer something personal, although a generic thank you is better than none I suppose. ;)
I ALWAYS customize any thank you notes I write, FOR that person.
I do not write 'generic' thank you notes.
I teach my kids that too.
I would happily wait as long as it took for a nice, handwritten, well thought out thank you.
I completely agree w/ LoveMommyhood. :)
One way or the other, any thank you note is appreciated.
There are still some classy people left.! I too like to write very personal
notes and receive personal notes. Take your time. Congratulations on
your marriage. May you have many, many happy years ahead.
I prefer a little of both, i understand not having the time to write out something very specific to each and every gift, however writing out a thank you we are so glad you were able to be there for our special day, or thank you for coming to share in our happiness should suffice...also I get small thank you notes & write big lol
You've only been married for two weeks! Okay, almost three...
Give yourself a break. Literally and figuratively. Like Dawn said, break down the task and tell yourself that you will write 10 thank you notes per night. (Or whatever number works for you) and stick to it. Put them in a stack and watch it grow, then when you are done, mail 'em all out.
To answer your question (loved your title, BTW), I do prefer a personal note, but it doesn't have to be an essay.
Good luck and invest in a really comfortable pen. It helps with writer's cramp! :)
Hold On Bride....you still have some time, BUT rather then write the WAR and PEACE of thank you notes....keep it short and sweet and get those puppies out. Weeks have a way of turning in to months.....and so on and so on.
Blessings....
Traditionally, brides have 1 year to send thank you notes after the wedding. And an additional 6 months for any gifts received after the wedding (guests can send a gift up to 1 year after the date of the wedding... hence the extra 6 months).
These rules were 'written' in the days of everything being handwritten. So durn straight, for hand written notes, they should very well stand. In my not so humble opinion.
He hehe J.... You will probably not like my answer. I LOVE receiving the long thought out thank you telling me they loved their gift and specifically stating the gift they received so that way I know they actually know what I gave them.
But - I also rarely go to weddings or any types of showers so when I do go I put a lot of thought into it.
Oh ya.. and Christmas cards... I hand write my cards every year with a nice hello and write out names and addresses too.. No stickers. But thats just me :)
Those more personal "thanks" mean a lot to me- and I DO notice and appreciate, it DOES make a difference. But, just a thanks in general is nice because some people forget those as well. It is your choice. If you want to spend more time on the thank you notes (and have that time), do it- if not... send out the generic thanks:)
Hand written - you have up to a year after the wedding. Form thank you notes are like junk mail.
I'm assuming that when you say generic form letter you don't literally mean a typed letter, right? Because that would be appalling. But if you mean handwriting the notes but are just talking about content - generic "thank you for the lovely gift and we were so happy that you were able to be able to share this special day with you" vs. something more intimate and detailed, either one is fine. As a general rule, people understand that newlyweds are quite busy and getting them out within a month to 6 weeks is considered good form. Like someone else said, make yourself write a few a day and make your hubby write the notes to his family and friends too. I did most of mine while watching TV - I would grab a stack of 10 and just crank them out during a half hour show and in 2 weeks they were done.
Uh, what is your husband doing? He can write them and you both sign them..
They are wedding gifts which means they are for both of you.
Split the list.. If he is not clever with words, come up with different thank you's based on different types of gifts.. He can co sign the ones you write you co sign the ones he writes.
You do have a year to complete them. Just do a few a week till they are all done. This is not just your responsibility, he also recieved the gifts.
First just so you know, the etiquette on wedding thank you's is a year so you can calm down a little. But, we went to a wedding in March and still haven't received a thank you and I think that is just too long so I would say you have about 3 months before the giver starts to wonder. As far as your question, I write personal thank you's and I like to receive personal thank you's. There are too many lazy things out there now so the last of the hand written personal note is something I want to do. It is the least I can do for the person who took the time to shop for me. Even with my 8 yr old son, this year I made him write thank you's for his bday gifts and thank each person for exactly what they gave. He had 25 to write so we did about 3 a day until they were all done.....with days that we did not write, it took about 3 weeks to get them all out.
As for my wedding or shower thank you's, I wrote about 10-15 per night to get them all done. It is a chore but oh-so appreciated. :o)
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We went to a wedding 2 months ago, and got the thank you yesterday in the mail. Honestly, I had not even once thought "where's my thank you note?" I have way too much going on in my life to keep track of how much time has gone by before a 'thank you' arrives. But it did arrive, and it was a 'generic' form letter (computer typed) thank you. It was a tad less personal than a hand written note would have been, but it didn't bother me. It's nice to be thanked, no matter what the card looks like. I had fun at the wedding, I am happy for the couple, and that is all that matters! Good luck.
Or just send a text message.
Of course you could e-mail and save the postage :~))
BTW, I hope marriage will be as good for you as it has been for me.
Good luck to you and yours.
I would just be happy to get a thank you note, frankly. I am still bitter that I never received a note from my cousin and his wife when we sent them a new baby gift 2 years ago! In fact, I have no idea if they even got it since they never mentioned it when we spoke on the phone. Now, I'm in shock that my niece didn't send me a thank you note for the graduation gift I sent her. We sent her $75, and I haven't heard a word. I just saw her last week when we went to her town for a vacation. I would like to note that she sent a note to my sister and mom. She has not sent a note to my other sister and me. It is so strange and rude.
Kudos to you for putting extra time and love into your thank you notes. It's a dying art.
this is just me thinking...if i handed someone a card with a nice chunk of change in it (for whatever reason), a nice, "WOW, thanks, that is so sweet and appreciated! is all i would expect. i'm not interested (it's none of my business) what you'll spend it on...it's a gift. i guess it's great but i feel like you're going above and beyond, and throwing in a nice bit of martyrdom to top it all off...
however you do it is fine, and a simple thank you note is fine...and i would give it a month or two before i started stressing over it.
I would appreciate either one. Even if I didn't get a thank you card it wouldn't bother me one bit. As nice as it is to personalize them, some of the people won't notice and may just toss the card in the trash anyway, so consider that you are really doing it for You. Are you trying to write them all in one sitting? If so, try doing just 2-3 at a time and you'll have them done in no time.
Personalized notes are my preference, and I think you have a month from the wedding to get them out.
I would probably have a general letter that has a few sentences about their particular gift so it's not so time consuming. Or a fill in the gift name on a generic letter and at the end say thanks again for the spice rack, we will definitely be using this when we cook.
I would much prefer a personalized note rather than a form note. I know they take longer to write. You might engage your husband to share the responsibility. However, I tried that -- he was to write to his family, I to mine. I got my thank you notes done, though it took a few months. He never did. I've assumed his family thought I was an ingrate ever since, but after almost 30 years it doesn't seem to matter.
