Technology and the ADHD Child

Updated on February 24, 2014
O.L. asks from Long Beach, CA
14 answers

My 5-year old son is difficult to manage at home because he has a very short attention span, he's impulsive, aggressive at times and jumps from one thing to the next. The only thing that keeps him focused is the iPad or computer. We are seeing several professionals to help with treating the behavioral and emotional issues. I'm facing these issues head on because his behavior throws a kink in the dynamic at home.

Does anyone else experience these types of issues at home? Do you have a child with ADHD sxs who shows an ability to sit still only when playing technology? How do you help keep them out of trouble without the technology?

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D.G.

answers from Dallas on

My ADHD kid hyperfocuses on tech stuff. His counselor said that although he is sitting still it is keeping his mind and hands active which meets that need in him. We are bad about letting him have entirely too much screen time. That is something we need to work on. While it is easy, it really isn't that good for them.

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C.V.

answers from Columbia on

Neither of my boys have ever been aggressive. That's not necessarily a hallmark of ADHD.

We kick them outside to play. And play hard. Outdoor play is something that ADHD kids NEED. The less structured and supervised the better.

Of course my AD/HD kids hyperfocus on technology. But I take it away and make them go find something else to do. Be firm "Go play outside." or, if the weather is too bad, "Go play in your room with your toys." Or, "Go read one of those books we got from the library."

I've found that technology does tend to make them act up (though I don't have the aggression issue, as previously stated). They backtalk more and don't want to do anything else. So we only allow games on the weekend, after all chores are completed to standard. NEVER do we use games to calm them, and never do we allow them on schooldays.

I think you're setting a very dangerous precedent by using the games to calm him. "If I act like a little sh*t, mommy gets irritated and gives me the game I want." It's a negative feedback loop and you just need to stop doing it. If he's acting like a sh*t, send him to his room or outside....because his need for stimuli to focus on is not being met. So send him to where it can be.

Best of luck!

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M.O.

answers from New York on

I don't have a child with ADHD, but I've worked with kids who did. (These kids had multiple diagnoses -- ADHD was often the least of it -- so I realize that the situation isn't quite parallel.)

But for what it's worth, in my experience, technology was part of the problem. It left kids overstimulated, and as soon as the device was turned off, they acted out like crazy. The less tech -- and the more outdoor exercise -- the better they did.

Now, I'm not saying no tech ever, but in my experience, it's like sugar. Great as a treat, not so great as a steady diet.

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E.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

My younger brother has ADHD. Technology always seemed to help him stay out of trouble too... he could sit still for an hour. But then his behavior would actually be worse afterwards. TV, movies and computer games flash faster than real life, so even though an ADHD child seems perfectly happy watching whatever it is... they're actually being overstimulated and it takes hours for their brains to calm down.

I'm sure that's the exact opposite of what you want to hear because it's the one thing that will contain your son... but I urge you to try to go as technology free as you can. It will take a while, but you'll see better behavior overall if you can do it.

3 moms found this helpful

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

My oldest child has ADHD, and I know many parents of kids with ADHD do not curb their kids' electronics usage, because it is one of the only way that we, as parents, can ever get a break. I do curb my son's. He gets very limited use of electronics.

It is very difficult in the winter, but what I have found to REALLY hold his attention is LEGOS. I never thought he'd be able to focus so much on them, but it is amazing how, even after his medication has worn off, the LEGOS continue to keep him engaged.

It is so much easier in the spring and summer when we can just go outside. If you're really in CA, try to keep your son outside and active as much as possible.

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M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

At the 2012 CHADD convention, there was an entire session devoted to video games and ADHD (we went to it). It's very, very common for kids with ADHD to hyperfocus with technology. It gives them the immediate feedback and consequences they crave, not to mention it's rapid fire like their brains.

Our son is obsessed with video games. We do set limits and when time is up, we call it a tech break. It isn't easy for him to come up with other things that interest him at age 11, since he's not into sports. He has discovered he likes creative play with his sister, though. Tell them to make a fort and they have a blast and come up with story line to go with the fort. At first, I really had to give specific ideas for play. It didn't come naturally to him after he lost interest in Legos.

At five, I'd be pushing Legos big-time. That was HUGE with our son at that age and it seems to be something kids with ADHD, in particular, excel at.

Also, I would be addressing the problem behaviors head-on. Is your son on medication? Is he seeing a therapist? Both of those are critical steps and can make life at home better (at least while the medication is active).

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G.D.

answers from Detroit on

I don't allow a lot of screen time. I have two ADHD (4total)and once they start it's hard to get them away from it.
I was having a very hard time getting them to do any chores without following tem around/them whining.
Our wraparound counselor suggested using a small amount of screen time as a reward for doing chores. This work well when the want screen time. They run around getting housework done and encouraging each other so they can play a certain game.
I also save screen time for business. For instance when I went to get my taxes done I sat them down with their nintendo DSs they hadn't seen in weeks and they were good as gold.
Work with the counselors and find what works for you. My son will mope around the house and whine if he can't have screen time, but once he's engaged in another activity I lay on the praise. We have to do lots of exercise in the house and I have tons of dexterity toys and fun projects avail.
Have you tried exploding popsicle sticks? My son was busy trying to figure that out for about a week.

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S.W.

answers from Detroit on

Hi L.,

I have to agree with the posts below that this technology does overstimulate and it does so on a deeply neurological level. All kids, mine included, have to have such stimulation limited and monitored. These children with the spectrum of dynamics that are part of ADHD are especially vulnerable to these stimulating effects.

Ask the professionals you're working with to make some suggestions as to which games and/or which platforms are most advantageous and simply set up, and strictly keep to, a structured schedule. In our case, it's 30 minutes after school, and 30 minutes after breakfast and 30 minutes after lunch on the weekends. If it becomes an issue then the time is simply revoked.

I wouldn't use it as a reward because that begs a power struggle, which will cause you to want to reason with a person who, with all due respect, is simply not neurologically mature enough to do with you yet. Remember our frontal lobes, the parts of our brains that can reason and plan fully, aren't completely formed until our early 20s. He'll get there.

best of all to you. S.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Our world has changed and is going to change more and more as our kids grow up into a technological society. Our guy gets wrapped up in visual stimulating items too. He can sit all day playing the Wii if we let him.

It's not great for him to use that much time but sometimes I need a mental break. If you don't have a kid like this you just can't comprehend needing a break from your kid. It's not the best choice I make but sometimes it's necessary.

I get it.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I have met a few moms at Kumon who say the only way to get their child to do the math is when they play video games, DS, whatever the game of their choice.

My husband is not diagnosed, but has a little something going on. He specializes in talking on multiple phones at one time. At the same time, I can look at him and carry on a conversation with him, while I type and it irritates him. I am not bothered by his phone habits, unless I am one of the callers.

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J.S.

answers from Phoenix on

My son is 9 (3rd grade) with ADHD. He takes medication and sees a counselor. The counselor just told me last session how horrible screen time (TV, tablets, computer, etc.) is for kids with ADHD. My son has trouble sleeping and is always awake 45 min to an hour before anyone else. My rule WAS he had to get dressed, then he could watch TV or play on his tablet until I woke up. But the counselor said this is not good on school days. She said that for a child with ADHD, using any screen time takes their brain at least 2 hours to calm down after they have stopped. It may calm them down while watching/playing, but afterward, it creates chaos. My son is no longer allowed to have any screen time in the morning. He can read a book, draw, play legos, etc. He was bummed, but understands it's for the better. He is no longer allowed screen time before karate class, or anything important. It's not a cure to his ADHD, but at least I'm not making it worse. Good luck!

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G.R.

answers from San Diego on

Please look into brainhighways.com

Its been a life saver!!!! I wish I could win the lottery today. I would send everyone I knew that had ANY ANY learning issues, behavioral, autism, stroke, ADD/ADHD. etc etc

Seriously at least look at the website. Dont rule it out. For me, I had to realize that children aren't going to miraculously grow out of ADD/ADHD. It will follow them forever, it may change form but its not an easy thing to be a part of I know first hand :-)
Good Luck

J.S.

answers from Richland on

Find other things they are successful at. The only reason technology is so addictive is that it is something they are good at.

I don't restrict technology with my kids and they are just fine. You are just as likely to find them reading books, playing with friends outside, as playing a game or something on their computer.

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N.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Honestly, the best thing we did was TAKE away the tv and video games!! My son at least, was horrible horrible after playing...not only is usual symptoms magnified 10 xs....but emotionally he couldn't control himself. During the school week absolutely nothing. Depending on the weather we might limit some time on Saturday. I can always tell when I come home and the hubby 'used' the video games as a babysitter. It drives me crazy that he can't follow the rules....but also understand why it's so easy to fall back on!! We keep him out of trouble with other stuff he enjoys. He's a creator so we have a closet filled with empty boxes, toilet paper rolls, cotton balls etc. I tell him to go build something, he complains about that, then get a book, doesn't want that then go outside.....still not working he can get ready for bed ;) Simple? Absolutely not! But in our house the alternative is even worse!

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