My 4 month old son has been swaddled since he was born. I've been having problems with his sleep cycle (thanks for all the responses and advice) and feel that it is hard for him to "self sooth" at night if he is swaddled. Family members and other mothers have suggested that I stop swaddling him. Today I tried to put him down without swaddling and he just cries and cries. Yeah, crying is a nice way of putting it. He gets so worked up these days that he screams like he is being hurt. It's heart wrenching and deafening at 3AM. Now he would cry once in a while (more so those several times during the night) when he was swaddled and a binky run or two usually did the trick and he would dose off. Today I did the CIO method with periodic interjections of putting the binky back in his mouth or just rubbing his head and telling him its ok and he eventually fell asleep due to exhaustion. He didn't sleep for long and was back SCREAMING/crying again. I got him up and did our normal feed/diaper change/play/ and now I'm going to try and put him down again without swaddling. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to go about helping him cope with not being swaddled or is it just a cold turkey move that he will eventually get used to?
I feel really bad because at the same time I am adjusting him to formula (I wasn't able to produce enough milk to have a back up supply, therefore I was never able to go anywhere without him and I have a few events coming up that I can't miss and I can't bring him). After a few days he is now taking both but still isn't a huge fan of the formula. I followed the advice of my pedi (on how to get him to take formula), he said "if he's hungry enough he'll take it". What a tough day that was, but it worked.
Thanks for taking the time to read and any suggestions are again very much appreciated.
Well the Pedi said that it was fine to swaddle him and eventually, as he gets bigger, he will either stick with it our bust out of it. His sleep cycle was off because my breast milk production went down and he was just HUNGRY! I've started him on formula and we are starting to have long sleep periods and he seems much much happier. Poor little guy. Other than being a little underweight at his 4 month check up, the Pedi said he was very strong and developmentally he is coming along GREAT! Whew! Thanks for taking the time to give me your advice and sharing your experiences.
My 2nd dd was swaddled for 8 months! She loved it, it helped her sleep, and she is now almost three and isn't asking to be swaddled, so really, they do grow out of it, but 4 months may be too soon. In some cultures, babies are swaddled until they are a year old.
He is an infant and needs to be swaddled as much as he needs. Mothers are so independent after they have children that they are forcing infants to cope in the big world WAY to young. When we choose to be moms, along with that comes sacrifices that should be enjoyed. It just saddens me when a culture of family, friends and even doctors think an infant needs to cry themselves to sleep or to somehow comfort themselves. I am sorry, but this is not right. Up to a year old they should have all the swaddling they want!!
That said, they do make hammocks for babies. It just may work for the "feel" of swaddling.
I have a 2.5 month old and he does not like to be swaddled all of the way. He likes to have his arms out. He gets mad if I try to swaddle him all the way. He will cry for a short time when I put him down but then he puts himself to sleep. If he cries for more than 10 minutes I go in to see if he needs something.He will not take a pacifer, I tried really hard to have him use one. My daughter liked being swaddled I am not sure when she stopped but I did not take it away from her.She also liked her pacifer but grew out of that to at about 18 months. Only one night of crying for it.
If your son likes it do it as long as he likes it.
My son is now 15, but when he was a baby he had collic really bad. I did the same as you by trying to comfort him as best as possible. My first pediatrician told me not to let him cry more than 10 minutes. I ended up changing pediatricians and the new one let me know that I didn't need to carry him around all day and that as long as he was fed and dry and not sick, it was okay to let him cry for periods of time during the day. This was heart wrenching for me, but it took some time and ended up working out well in the long run after we had his milk and everything else adjusted. They told me the collic should have gone away after he was a few months but he was crying well into his 7th month.
I would try just wrapping his lower body in the blanket, maybe from his waist down, so that his hands can be free. If he really likes being swaddled that might be enough to calm him down. My son too loved to be swaddled and he just slowly grew out of it, but he wouldn't sleep unless he was swaddled. Good Luck!
Hi J.,
Welcome to the joys of motherhood. It sounds to me like your trying to figure out what is socially acceptable. Your son is 4 months old! When you are upset don't you want to be comforted? There is nothing wrong with picking your son up and loving him in his time of need. I have a 3 year old son and a 5 month old daughter and neither one of them have ever cried themselves to sleep. My children are just fine. It also may too much change for your son to deal with... formula and to swaddle or not to swaddle.
I understand your a first time mom and I am sorry if my comments seem harsh. It just breaks my heart to picture a baby left crying in a room all alone, when there is such a simple answer. I also am not too clear... are you putting your son on formula because you have an event to go to or because you don't produce enough milk?
My suggestions, take them or leave them, is to just love your son and do what you feel is right. Don't let society tell you what is right.
I am curious as to why you think that swaddling your son is messing with his sleep cycles? Do you swaddle him day and night? I invested in a miracle blanket (swaddle blanket, son looks like a burrito with his legs hanging out!) per the advice of a neighbor and have used it since we came home from the hospital - but ONLY at night. He goes down at 10pm and the swaddling and the lights out seem to be a cue to him that it is sleep time. He sleeps 7 hours and is 11 weeks old. Has slept 7 hours since 4 weeks. I am convinced that swaddling him has helped with this.
I do agree that weaning nursing and stopping swaddling all at once may be too much to deal with for your little one. I am not a fan of the CIO method - babies need comfort from somewhere and I think they all get it from different sources. My daughter HAD to be held to sleep for the first 3 years of her life and it seems my son enjoys being swaddled! Best of luck-
