Sister Engaged to a Girl

Hopefully very soon DOMA will be repealed and their marriage will be federally recognized! Congratulations to them.

LOL...
No you wont be arrested.
They are getting the license in New York.
They will already be married.
Anyone can have a ceremony of any kind.
You are not handing out marriage licenses, you will be fine.
Some day, hopefully very soon, they wont have to fly all the way across the country to get married like every other tax paying, legal citizen of the united states.
You do not need to be ordained, you are not marrying them, they will already be married.

PS: To others who don't know the law,
there is marriage equality in New york and 5 other states now where anyone, gay or straight, can get a marriage licenses just like anyone else.
Most states recognize marriages done in other states and countries, regardless of who is in the marriage.

Their marriage will only be legal in the state of New York or that allows gay marriage. Since Texas doesnt have gay marriage, the marriage wont count in Texas. They have to live in a state that allows it for it to be valid!

THIS is EXACTLY why gay marriage should be legal every where! THINK of the ECONOMIC IMPACT it has.

Have you BEEN to a gay reception? They are FABLOUS! Legalize gay marriage and the economy WILL recover!

Congrats to your sister!

I performed a commitment ceremony for a lesbian couple in Feb. It's not a legal ceremony and they can't get a marriage license in Wisconsin. It's a way to show everyone they are committed to each other.
I would advise your sister and her partner to talk to an estate, wills & trust and probate attorney. Since their marriage may not be enough for them to be considered power of attorney to speak for each other. They should put everything in writing and list each other as power of attorney for medical and other emergencies. They should also make sure that everything they own, except maybe their cars should be in both of their names. An attorney can advise them better than I. Families can be weird in the case of a medical emergency. The partner may know the other doesn't want to be kept alive by machines but if the next of kin is her mom and the mom insists on life support she may have no say unless there is a legal document. Also in case of death if there is no will or other documentation a family member such as a parent or sibling may have more rights than the surviving partner.
Since it's not a legal ceremony you should be able to perform it. You may be able to find ideas on youtube.

Legal or not... Enjoy and celebrate the event with them! Congratulations

I would imagine that the "small ceremony" will be symbolic only and have no legal standing in your state (hence the trip to NY to get legally married). So it's not "legal" in that sense but it's not "illegal" in the sense that the police aren't going to come (I assume that's not what you're asking, btw ;-)). Congratulations to her and her fiancee!

It won't be legally recognized by the state of Texas, but it's perfectly ok to have a wedding ceremony in any state between two gay people. Having a ceremony isn't a crime even if the state doesn't recognize gay marriage. Congrats to your sister!

Im not sure. Im a proud sister n law to my wonderful sisters girlfriend. Im proud of my sister for being who she is and living her life. I love her and would never not support her. I think you can have a commitment ceramony here. I don't see why not! Tell them congrats from me!

they are having a ceremony to celebrate, it doesn't matter if it is legal or not it is about their commitment to each other which is what a marriage is really about anyway
(which in the state of texas it is not which is why they are getting married in NY)

They can have a ceremony in Texas, but it won't be recognized a legally binding event. Its legally binding (as a hetero marriage would be) in New York. Although I would think they would have to stay and live in New York too - but obviously they've already put some thought into it.
Grats to your sister.

It won't be recognized in Texas, but it's not illegal to do it :P People do ceremonies without a marriage license, etc everywhere. In NY if they get a marriage license (I don't know NY standings on that "issue") it will be recognized in all states that recognize gay marriage. You don't need to be certified in Texas because they will already be legally married from NY and they couldn't get a license in Texas so they wouldn't need an ordained minister.

you already have your answer, so i just wanted to throw in my congratulations. somehow the whole new york thing just makes me feel the world just got a little better :)

Hi N.,

I think its wonderful you will be doing the ceremony, I think you are fine doing the service without a license. GL!

M

Think you ceremony as a kids playing in the playground and getting married. It's not the "real" marriage, NY is the real one.
Wish her congratulations from all of us!!!!

it's not illegal, but you can't file the gov't paperwork.

ohh yayy, congrats to the happy couple. your ceremony will be a celebration, not a legal one. the one in NY is the legal one. All the best to your sister. Hopefully every state will soon follow NY. it's about time.

Not legally binding, just a social celebration. Their ceremony and marriage certificate will be from the state of NY not Texas. Congratulations to them.

This is not a big deal. My husband's father is a minister but was not registered in the state we lived in. He performed our ceremony. My friend's boyfriend had some ridiculous /legal license that he got from a mag like Rolling Stone. He signed our paperwork for us. We have been legally married for 10 years. Looking back, we always think of my FIL performing the ceremony not that jerk of a man my friend dated then :-) You performing this ceremony is like making a toast at any other wedding....but even more special. You have a very special part in their day. No one thinks you are performing a legal right. It sounds very nice that you mean so much to her that she wants to include you in this role.

Congratulations to them both :-) Very exciting to be lucky enough to find the Love of your life!!!
A "spiritual ceremony" will be Lovely (no one will get arrested) and SO NICE that she has asked you do perform it for them !!
Good luck !!!

A ceremony is legal everywhere. Her marriage will be legal in several states, but Texas is one that does not legally recognize them.

no silly, don't even worry about it bc it's kinda like a pretend ceremony anyways bc they are already married and you I am assuming is not a minister, so just roll with it and enjoy the family get together. Sounds like your sis just wants to share it with all of you!

Congratulations to your sister, and what an honor to be asked to officiate. Having the ceremony is perfectly legal. They just won't be legally married according to the state of Texas, whether a minister or a lay person performs the ceremony .

If they are getting married in NY then any service elsewhere would not need to be legal as it would just be for show.

There's nothing illegal in you doing it since their marriage would have happened in NY. Here in TX they won't be recognized as married by the state since they don't recognize gay marriage. It's for sure just fine for you to do that. There's no paperwork you'd be doing, unless you made some up:-)

You may need to call it a commitment ceremony in Texas if Texas does not recognize gay marriage. Since they are getting married in New York you do not need to be ordained - unless you want to be. But, it is surely not illegal to hold a reception and party for the couple when they return from New York.

Tell her Congratulations!!!!