Seeking Help with Refusing Daycare

Updated on December 16, 2007
K.T. asks from West Orange, NJ
5 answers

Hi moms,

I was just looking to get opinions from some of you regarding my son and daycare. He is 2 1/2 and used to love going to daycare. Back in September, he changed classes to the next level and thus changed teachers. The first week and a half or so were great, no problems. But then everything changed... mornings are dreaded now. He constantly says he doesn't want to go and he wants to stay home. he does everything in his power to make the process as difficult as possible. Getting dressed, shoes, jacket, getting out to the car, then getting into the classroom. each phase is a huge struggle. I have tried so many different tactics to ease this process. But, nothing seems to be working. His teacher says it's just the age, which i agree with to some extent. but, i also don't care for this teacher very much. My husband and I both have noticed that she's just not very nurturing, compared to the two other teachers he's had in the past who were awesome (back when he enjoyed going to daycare). So I'm wondering what other moms think. Is it the age, is it a combo of the two? Any suggestions to make this phase go a little more smoothly? He's only there 3 days a week, but those 3 mornings a week are really trying!

Thanks everyone!
K.

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for your responses. We will be talking to some of the other parents to get their feelings of the class and will probably talk to the director and see if we can switch classes, which was also advised from one of his prior asst. teachers.

thanks again to all!

More Answers

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J.A.

answers from New York on

Is there anyway that you could spend the day with him to show him how much fun it can be? Or I would ask some of the other parents to see what they think of the teacher. If the responses aren't to her favor, I would speak to the director.

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J.S.

answers from Syracuse on

Sounds to me like something happened. I would question the teacher, and look for another daycare. The problem isn't your child, it's the environment your child is in.

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T.P.

answers from Atlanta on

Sounds strange. I don't think it is an age thing. He has been in daycare all this time and did not have any problems. As he gets older it should get better. Sounds like the teacher is not that nice to him. Maybe you can pop in school unannounced, and also try speaking to other parents about how they feel about this teacher. Maybe you should see if you can change class or find another daycare all together. There is a reason why he does not want to go. You don't want to send him to a place where he is not treated well. Good luck.

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K.J.

answers from New York on

I am a home daycare provider, and I am def going with something had to of happened. If your child has been in care then I don't think it is just the change it teacher especially if he was fine the first week or so. I would question the teacher and if that doesn't work maybe go to her boss. I am not sure sitting in on the day would help because I am not sure your child would cooperate and do what he should be because if he doesn't want to go then he is going to stay by your sind. Keep us posted as to how things work out. Good luck

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K.M.

answers from Syracuse on

I've always said that if a small child didn't want to go to school, or daycare, or a friends house, anything of the sort then there was a problem. Most likely he is seeing the same thing in his teacher that you are seeing. Maybe he just doesn't like his new teacher. If there is another 2 yr old class he can go to you might try requesting that. You might also ask if it's possible that he goes to his old room until he calms down for a while. This could be worth discussing with other parents from the room, and maybe even with the director of the daycare. This could lead to problems with Elementary school if something isn't resolved. Good luck!

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