Question for Co-sleeping Families

Updated on April 07, 2011
S.G. asks from Fort Eustis, VA
17 answers

Okay, call me ignorant of the co-sleeping lifestyle choice. We have chosen a different path for our family. We all have our reasons and that is not even the point of my post. The probably silly question I have is...when do you "do it" with your significant other? Say you have a 16 year old and a 14 year old who sleep in their own rooms. But you also have a 4 year old who sleeps in your bed with you. How does it work out? I know people are still doing it, but how are they making the magic happen?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

@Pamela Raven & Son: I consider your comment competely rude and uncalled for. Who are you to make an assumption about my personal life? You know nothing about my sex life or the circumstances under which I conduct it. Please try to just answer the question asked without inserting your own editorial insults!

Featured Answers

M.P.

answers from Provo on

With me, my son co sleeps part time. I HAVE to have my room for me (I live with my parents too, ugh, so it's my only space) to do homework and what not. So he goes to bed in his room, but around 10 or 11 he wakes up and wants to sleep with me or at least in my bed. So between that time me an my partner are . . . canoodleing. Or we find other creative ways. . . like the shower! Love that one.

4 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

sorry you got some ugliness there. some folks just can't resist attempting to make themselves sound ever so much *more*.
magic can be even more magic for a little planning. spontaneity is awesome, but so is the anticipation of knowing in advance and egging each other. that 4 year old is going to have playdates, or get involved in a rousing game of monopoly with her siblings, or snuggle in with her favorite movie and a bowl of popcorn, and subtly engineering these events is part of the fun. and magic does indeed happen in the unlikeliest places!
:) khairete
S.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.C.

answers from Dallas on

I don't have teens, but our cosleeping kids have always gone to bed before we do, and we have the whole rest of the house to enjoy for several hours. Plus there's always Saturday mornings, when the kids are enjoying breakfast and cartoons in front of the TV when mom and dad have some "quiet time" in their room.

We're expecting our third, so we obviously manage ;-)

5 moms found this helpful

J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

We didn't want to co-sleep, but ended up doing it for a few reasons (mainly because I traveled a lot with her and she co slept with me everytime we traveled). So anyways we did co sleep until she was 1 (we only have 1 child).
Couch, kitchen, shower (lots of showers together), car, etc. It's almost more fun to sneak around and find a spot. When our daughter goes to the inlaws for the night we definately took advantage of it!
I do have to say I was happy when she got in her own bed and we got to sleep next to each other again, and make the magic happen a lot more often! ;)

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.O.

answers from Harrisburg on

Hopefully you don't just have one bedroom!

2 moms found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Houston on

I co sleep, with each child roughly about the first 2 years, the simple answer is .....everywhere!, If i want the bed to "ourselves" i will put her for a nap on the couch, do it, then move her into the room.

personally i prefer the couch, and morning sex anyway. Plus my husband is always offshore, he works 25 days of the month, i get pretty creative 4 out of those 6 days.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.L.

answers from New York on

get creative! You have the rest of the house to use! :)

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

Umm, that's what preschool is for. "Mommy and daddy" time!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

In any part of the house, any time you aren't sleeping! We never were ones to have sex at night (too tired) and only in the bed.

I know it depends on work and school schedules, but we never had a problem finding a place and time. Sometimes we just needed to be quick!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Boston on

Our kids usually started off the night sleeping somewhere else (bassinet, crib) so we did have alone time in our bedroom. When the youngest was 2 and still spending about half the night with us, he could get up before us and hang out with his older brothers and sister while hubby and I stayed in bed and slept a little longer (or not). And as others have stated, there's the whole rest of the house...

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.R.

answers from New York on

my kids start off in their own beds, we lock the door and get busy. yes, we are interrupted sometimes, but it usually works out just fine. you have to get a little creative. sometimes its a bit more planned and a bit less magical :) but sometimes its more fun because being spontaneous when the opportunity suddenly presents itself is exciting too, reminds us of when we were kids...

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Richmond on

Pamela, Raven & Son - not all of us are fortunate enough to have family close by. My son has 0 grandparents and none of our other family lives close.

S. - we don't co-sleep but, that said, it can still be hard to find the time and/or place without kids (and before exhaustion sets in). We spend every weekend afternoon "napping" at the same time as the kids and that helps supplement the week when the magic may have only happened once.

1 mom found this helpful

T.K.

answers from Dallas on

People groups all over the world co-sleep. I'm down with it, my husband is not! My kids get put in thier own beds at night but invariably find thier way to my bedroom around 3 or 4 am. If we want to be amorous my husband will carry them back to thier own beds and lock our bedroom door. If they don't have beds, maybe the couch, or put them in bed with the older sibling.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

You do it, when the kids are napping or sleeping!
Or out with Grandparents.

You do it, wherever else in the house.

That's what we do.

Our kids are 4 and 8.
They have their own rooms/beds now, but they sometimes are on the floor futon in our room.
When they were younger, I co-slept with them in our room. On the floor futon as well. Not in our bed.
But that's what we did.
You just go elsewhere in the house and make magic!
When the kids are sleeping.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My hubby and I do it when our daughter is watching a movie. We see that she is interested in the film and is so "glued" to the TV she won't notice if the house was falling on her head. My hubby and I give the "look" and we're sneaking off to the bedroom to do the tango! Tee hee.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.H.

answers from Norfolk on

we would take sleeping child to their bed after she fell asleep in ours if we felt the need to be "together". luckily mine sleep through being transported after falling asleep. i suppose you could go to the living room or if the baby isnt using his room get him a twin bed for his room for you two to use in these cases.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from Springfield on

Our kids always begin the night in their own bed. If they want to join us in the middle of the night, that's fine. Our 4 1/2 year old has not wanted to sleep in our bed since he was about 2 1/2. Our 2 year old is a frequent visitor.

Our biggest problem is how busy our lives are. By the time the kids are in bed, we're ready for bed :-)

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions