Potty Training Nightmare - Prosper,TX

I know this may sound gross but it worked in less than a month with my daughter. While I changed her #2s, I'd get all excited and say "OOhh you have a blue poop today." Since she knew her colors so well, I'd even tell her she had magenta and chartruse, even rainbow poop. I told her the only way she could see it is if she went in the potty. That was all it took. And by the time she went, we made such a big deal about actually going on the potty, that it didn't bother her that the stuff in the bowl was pretty boring. Hope that helps.

Our son was a little younger, but the same issue...couldn't go to preschool if still in diapers. We threw a move into the mix at the same time and out of necessity, dropped potty training altogether. With the move and all, we just couldn't stress about training at the same time. We just dropped it, didn't talk about it, didn't even try to get him to go to the potty. Then one day, he went in, set up his potty chair and used it...all by himself (I was in another room, but could see everything from where I was.). In just a few days, he was going consistently in the potty and had started wearing underwear all day with no accidents. Even that day, when we went out later, he told us when he had to go. I really feel that since we had given him the information (trust me, we had tried EVERYTHING) when he was ready, he knew what to do and did it. By the time school started, he was ready to go! I think the more we stressed about it, the worse it was.

I teach at a preschool and there are several boys that have turned 4 and are still in pull-ups, so it's not that uncommon.

I'm pretty much in the same boat myself right now - my son will be 4 in August. He knows when he has to pee and poop, but just refuses to use the toilet on a regular basis. I've used reward systems in the past, but my son only used the toilet when we told him too. This time, we're trying a reward system again, but only when he uses the toilet on his own. I don't ask him if he has to go to the bathroom, I don't say anything when I change his poopy pull-up (unless he comments about not liking a poopy diaper - then I casually remind him that it wouldn't be a problem if he pooped on the toilet). Since I've backed off, he's shown more interest in the toilet. He's not completely toilet trained yet, but he's getting better. Some kids just need to do it on their own terms. For his reward I bought a Bob the Builder watch (he really wants one), which I prominently display. I got a bag of glass beads at the dollar store (pirate treasure!) and a little plastic treasure box from a party store. He gets one treasure for pee, two for poop, and the watch when he fills the box. The best advice I've gotten from friends is to remember that my son will eventually be potty trained. He's not gonna go to college in diapers! Basically, he needs to be in control of the process, and his potty training refusal does not mean I'm not a good mother.

It may just be maturity. If his system is still underdeveloped he just may not be able to control it yet. Hang in there, continue to gently guide him. Don't be afraid of a little bribery as mentioned by the others. You still have all summer to go and the incentive of swimming or not if he is still in diapers may be all it takes.

D. M