Most Awkward Situation: Uncomfortable Giving Mother-in-Law Injections

Would this be considered bad for you, administering medicine without a current license? Are you insured to do this? What if your MIL has a bad reaction?

These are the reasons I would give her: concern for her health coming first and foremost. At a doctor's office, if she has a reaction to the injection (either the injection itself or the administration) then she's likely closer to getting the medical care she'd need.

Or you could always take it on yourself and just say "You know, the last time I gave you the shot, X happened. (However you want to explain it.) This made me realize that I'm not the best candidate for doing this, and I want to make sure you stay healthy. I'm not confident that a mistake would be a minor thing, and I cannot discern between blood and the medication, which puts me at a loss. You should plan on having your medical provider do this. I'd really hate to hurt you in any way, and a mistake could cause you serious problems."

I think you could suggest this in a concerned and caring way, not "I don't want to" but "I don't think I'm the best person to...". She'll likely be disappointed, but it could be worse!

If her doctor will do them, why does she hate having him do them? Does she just not want to go to the office to have them done, or is she uncomfortable with her doctor? I think that if her doctor is willing to do them for her, she should stick with that; that way if anything goes wrong with them, she will already be at the doctor. I don't think you are overreacting at all. Just be honest and tell her that you don't feel comfortable administering the injections, especially since you haven't practiced nursing for a while. And even if your license was up to date, I'm not sure if you should be doing it anyway, because couldn't you be held liable if something goes wrong? You are being reasonable, just tell her that you would feel awful if something went wrong with the injections and you really have her well-being in mind.

I would just tell her you're not comfortable with it.
Tell her that even if it was one of your own kids, you wouldn't feel comfortable.
You know she doesn't like the doctor doing it, but he is the one that should be doing it.
She might not understand it, but being a nurse and giving people you don't know injections is one thing. Doing it to someone so close to you is another.
I had a friend who had cancer and needed a shot and as much as I loved her and would do anything in the world for her, I could not give her that shot. A friend who had gestational diabetes begged me to give her insulin injections because she said she couldn't do it herself. I talked her through it. I was there when they showed her exactly what to do, but I just couldn't do it myself. She got over her fear and did her own injections which was fine with me.
I think you're just going to have to tell her that the last thing you would do is hurt her and you'd rather someone at the doctor office do it. If you hit the wrong thing or didn't hit the right place, you'd never forgive yourself and you can't risk her maybe not forgiving you eiither.
If she turns that around to make it you refusing to help her....that's her problem.
You are a FORMER RN.
I work at a hospital and family members don't usually care for family members. I mean, a surgeon doesn't do his own family member's appendectomy. They might be present.
I just think you should tell her you're not comfortable. If you know who her doctor is, tell him you're not comfortable and he might be able to convince her to have it done at the office. Or wherever.
I personally wouldn't do it. And I hope like heck she can understand your reasons.

Best wishes.

As others have said, your training is not up to date and you don't have the support of a medical office if something goes wrong. My grandmother was an RN way back (trained pre WWII) and after she retired she let her license lapse so she would not be asked to do anything medical anymore. It is a good and valid reason not to do this. Also, it is ethically tricky at best to practice almost any kind of physical or mental health care on a relative. My background is in mental health and they really emphasized this point in my training program.

I'm copying exactly what Hazel W said, because I think it's perfect:

You could always take it on yourself and just say "You know, the last time I gave you the shot, X happened. (However you want to explain it.) This made me realize that I'm not the best candidate for doing this, and I want to make sure you stay healthy. I'm not confident that a mistake would be a minor thing, and I cannot discern between blood and the medication, which puts me at a loss. You should plan on having your medical provider do this. I'd really hate to hurt you in any way, and a mistake could cause you serious problems."

I think you could suggest this in a concerned and caring way, not "I don't want to" but "I don't think I'm the best person to...". She'll likely be disappointed, but it could be worse!

Neurobion is not even a recognized treatment here in the U.S. If you ever want to work in medicine again, or even if you don't, I would not do this. There are side effects to this this medication, and risks to the administration.

The key here is that you're a FORMER RN who hasn't practiced in 10 years. What your MIL is asking you to do sounds shady. It opens you up to a lot of liability if something goes wrong, and you don't have any back-up except for relying on 911 to get there in time. You said yourself that the color of the medication makes it impossible to tell if you're even doing this properly and you think you've already done it incorrectly once.

How do you even know that this stuff she got out of the country is legal? Her PCP "can" do it but she prefers that he not do it? Shady. Does she really have an issue with him doing it or does he have issues doing it because it's not a medication that he can verify the origin of? Maybe he's the one refusing to give her the medication.

There are just too many questions. Shady.

I agree that if you're not comfortable doing this that you shouldn't do it. Telling her that you're not comfortable doing it is a reasonable way to handle this. If she doesn't accept it, so sad, but I suggest that if you explain your reasons and offer her another way she'll be OK with it.

My clinic has a nurse/injection room. Perhaps she could have a nurse at her clinic administer the shots. She probably wouldn't have to make an appointment which would make it nearly as easy as you giving them to her.

I am not an RN, and the only injections I have administered were my Granny's insulin - way different than your Mother-in-Law's.

But, can she get home health care? Then you would have a reasonable "out" for not giving the injections and be assured they were being administered correctly.

Good Luck and God Bless

P. S. I think you are GREAT for helping out like this.

NO WAY!! I would tell her that I am worried that if I mess up, it will be on me! That is too risky, I am sure it is ethical, and what if she gets a reaction, what if you put it in wrong?? What if she gets sick or worse....?? Tell your husband to tell her! Plus, what is this stuff from Central America??? no way would I do that.

I agree with others who say the whole setup sounds shady. Why is this medicine coming from Central America? Is it just manufactured there under license to a reputable pharmaceutical firm or is it...from some clinic or doctor who wouldn't be allowed to market it directly in the U.S.? I can only hope it's legal and legitimate medicine if her doctor administered it -- but did her doctor actually prescribe it or did someone at that office just agree to shoot it into her a few times, then maybe backed out once they realized it put them at a risk for liability? You need to ask her if it was prescribed by her (licensed) doctor here in the U.S., if it's recognized and approved by the FDA, why exactly she doesn't want her doctor's office involved anymore etc. And then tell her you care for her and do not want to hurt her and were shaken up by the previous incident where you had trouble giving her the shot. Then put it all in her court: Offer to drive her to her doctor to get the shots administered there and see how she reacts. Ask her if she got this from her doctor or through some other route that is not fully legal, or by something legal but dangerous like mail order.

She may truly want this medication but you could end up in legal trouble if it's from some fly-by-night unlicensed "practitioner" outside the U.S and she gets harmed by it; you could lose the ability to return to being a nurse if it's on your record that you administered this.

I think if you approach it from a legal or ethical standpoint she should understand. Medical professionals are not supposed to treat family, and administering medical care to anyone without proper licensing is illegal. Now I am assuming that you have not kept up your licensing over the last 10 years. If you have then this argument may be completely invalid. If so, feel free to ignore me. :)

My Father is a P.A. and never liked giving family shots or anything... Since you are 10 years out of practice and probably no longer carry a license - I'm sure there is nothing unethical about it... but your personal comfort level should be enough that you should be ok telling her that you are so out of practice that you don't feel like you should be doing this. Tell her to go to her Primary Care office for the injections.

You are so right and have every right to feel completely uncomfortable with this. If you did make a mistake and hurt her, what would happen then? I know you are a health care professional and I think that is why you know this is a potentially high risk thing to do. I wouldn't do it, hands down. I had to give a friend an injection to the hip once, very similar situation, I was so nervous and I will not do it again!! I would just tell her you aren't comfortable, you don't owe anybody something like that. I would draw a boundary line right there, especially since this is a medication not recognized here. Good luck!!

If you are uncomfortable, I don't think your background matters. I'd tell her "We tried, but I just don't feel comfortable doing this. You're going to have to talk to your doctor about your options."

honesty....please! Just tell her the truth. You are uncomfortable & therefore unable to comply any further.

I know many medical professionals who will not treat their family members for this reason. Uggg, this is not a comfortable situation and I would hope no one would think ill of you if you just explained how uncomfortable you are in regard to the color and therefore the difficulty. I am assuming that she gets the shots elsewhere because they are not approved in the US? If that is the case, that alone would make me a little nervous. I would have her doctor do these. Of course it is easier for her if you do them, but hey, obviously this is causing an issue and one that sounds like it should be avoided. Good luck though and I hope your MIL feels better!

If your not practicing under a physician or company, then i would think you are doing it unethically already. You should check with an ethics board if in question. Yes, tell her you dont want to do it. What if something bad happens and she sues you for her condition she is left with!

Is you license current?
Is this under your scope of practice. Contact your board.
best, k

even if it is not unethical, you can say it is. By law you do not have to do any procedure that you find questionable/makes you uncomfortable. (all states have something like that on the books, it is usually in terms of abortions but this would be covered). You can, under this law make the claim that it is in fact illegal for you to do it...