Looking for Answers to Why My 4 Yr Old Makes Herself Throw Up

My son used to make himself throw up when my husband or myself would upset him (by going on a date night, by saying no, etc). At first it would upset me and make me feel soooo guilty for 'making' him throw up. We left dinner parties to come home, I didn't get my hair done because I would have to leave him with a babysitter. Soon, it just got to be too much and knowing in my mom mind that he was going for the guilt that I was feeling when he'd throw - I had HIM clean up his mess once - that's all it took - once.... He has not done it since. I know that there are a lot of mom's out there that may not like what I did, but seriously, I am the adult here and I refuse to clean up throw up that isn't done as sick.
M.

Hi J.:

I think this could be a serious issue that maybe you should consult your pediatrician about. It sounds like a cry for attention, but it's obviously really unhealthy for the child. First, I would ask if there could be a medical reason for it. If not, maybe you should think about contacting a child psychologist.

It would worry me that later down the line she could develop an eating disorder. Even now, it sounds like this could really affect her health if prolonged.

I would have her checked out - there is something called cyclic vomiting syndrome and it can have various causes. It sounds like your daughter is doing this when she is upset about something else BUT in case she is first feeling ill and THEN gets upset and vomits, you should rule this out. I would be very cautious if the doctor starts throwing meds at you - so many kids are being given meds for reflux and other things when it's not really necessary. There are drug-free nutritional approaches that adjust the diet before going into medications, especially in one so young. Many meds cause other problems even if they help improve a symptom. Meds are not usually CURING something as much as MASKING the symptom. I have many friends who have gone this route with a particularly effective nutritional supplement. A friend of mine is a pharmacist, her daughter had chronic vomiting syndrome, and she had to really push push push to get the right tests. They didn't do them all, she was medicated inappropriately, and underlying cause was missed.

If it's not physical, then it can be emotional or psychological. If not paying much attention to the vomiting has a positive effect, then that will tell you a lot. Don't be afraid to investigate these options!

I think it is really important that you not blame yourself for this problem, whatever the cause, and think that there is something you are "doing wrong as a parent"! You are like all of us - your kid is doing something odd and you are reaching out to find a solution. Different factors are in play and that doesn't make it your fault!

My daughter went through a phase in which she was throwing up too. Fun times! The first thing I did was have her checked out medically. That came back clear. I then consulted a child therapist, who determined that she had a very sensitive gag reflex, so if anything made her gag (whether it was intentional on her part, or some unpleasant sight), she would throw up. The doctor advised me that many children do make themselves throw up - either for attention, or to get their way when thwarted. Her advice was to react as unemotially and matter-of-factly as possible. When your daughter throws up, just help her get herself cleaned up, then clean up the mess, and that's it. Don't make a big deal of it. If you do that consistently, the throwing up ought to stop. This solution did end up working for us. It didn't happen overnight, but with consistency, she did stop vomiting as a means to get her way.

It sounds more behavioral then medically related. However, i would take her to see her pediatrician. Since she is so young, doing this can lead to a lot of digestive and GERD problems. I remember a friend of mine would throw up right before we went to math class. Without fail, every day she would do this. I am not sure as to why your daughter is doing this, but it seems more of an attention seeking behavior.

It could be psychological, but just so you explore all avenues, your daughter could have acid reflux. My daughters both have it - they have completely different symptoms. For my youngest, she has an EXTREMELY sensitive gag reflex - a piece of food being too large in her mouth would make her throw up. She threw up so much that if she heard the words "throw up" she would sometimes throw up. She's been on medicine for a couple of years now and it's MUCH better now. Just a thought.

My daughter did that also when she was two years old. she would make her self vomit anytime she didt get her own way,but she did grow out of it, I tryed not to give in to it and totly try not to make a big deal about it. It lasted a few months.It was not fun but we got throught it. good luck.