Is It Too Early for a Big Boy Bed?

Updated on February 17, 2007
K.Z. asks from Mechanicsburg, PA
32 answers

I've talked about this with my mom and other parents that are older than me (their kids are all 15 and older). My son will be two next month, and he's never shown any interest in climbing out of his crib. He's usually very good when you lay him down for bed he almost always just lays right down to go to sleep. Is it too soon to take away the crib and put him in a big boy bed? He likes to play and wrestle and lay down in my bed, although I only let him lay in my bed when he's not feeling well. I dont want him to get used to it when he doesnt have his own big bed. I'm realy confused about this. I'm a single parent and my mom says that when he's in his bed I'll lose any freedom I have now. Well I dont really have any freedom, when he wakes up he calls for me and I go get him. If he gets up in the middle of the night I go get gim (he only gets up when he's sick and congested). I would greatly appreciate any advice that anyone gives me. Thank you.

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A.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hello K.,
I left my son in his crib until he started showing signs of wanting out of it. Once they get that little bit of freedom being able to climb in and out of bed by themselves, they tend to become a little more demanding. My son was 2.5 before I moved him into a toddler bed. I would suggest though to set some ground rules with him before making the move and to keep on him every night and make it routine or he'll never listen and constantly get up when he wants to. As long as you keep at whatever you start, he'll follow. Good Luck
A.

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My son is 1 and he is in a big boy bed already. Well, it is a mattress on the floor. He loves his big boy bed. I just wanted to say you have to do what works for you and your family. He is not too young and he will be fine with whatever you choose.

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H.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son is 2 1/2 years old. He has been in his big boy bed since about 16 months. He preferred our bed to his crib. He didn't really show signs of climbing out of his bed but I had found out I was pregnant and wanted him out of the crib prior to the new baby being born. Because I ended up having a miscarriage, the crib vs bed with a new baby never became an issue after all. However, I don't regret the switch.

Although you really don't need to switch your son at this time, it wouldn't hurt to either. Just keep some safety issues in mind. A child care expert my sister used to babysit for moved her toddler from a crib to a mattress on the floor instead of a bed. In this way, she didn't have to worry about the toddler falling out of bed. You could do this or if you choose a bed, don't forget the side rails to prevent falling out of bed. Also, make sure that your toddler cannot fall down the stairs if your bedrooms are on a second floor. Also, make sure Aidan can't get into anything dangerous if he gets out of bed without telling you. (For example, close the bathroom door so he can't get into soap or cleaning products or the toilet.) Lastly, be ready to have a visitor in your bedroom in the middle of the night. This is both a positive and a negative. Aidan can come to you if he has a problem. And he'll come to you if he wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to play, too.

=) Good luck with Aidan and the bed. Another positive of him being in his own bed, you can have a bedtime story in his bed with him.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I know tons have already responded to you. But I say leave him in his crib long as possible!! My son was the same way... 2 and had never even tried to climb out. Then one day up, out, and over he went like he'd done it since he was born!! But being that old he never hurt himself.
We debated moving my son to a bed before that too, but then we decided there must be a reason he likes to stay in his crib. Think of it this way.... Your son is perfectly content in his crib for a reason. It's familiar to him, it's comforting, he feels safe in there. Why would you want to take all that from him???
I say if there's no specific reason (like needing the crib for new baby) then why mess with him?? He'll decide when he's done with the crib. And don't worry chances of him being 4 and still (my hubby's worry) in the crib are slim to none!!!

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K.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi my name is K. and I have a 3 yr old son and I am also a single mom. My son was the same way, he never crawled out of his srib or showed any interest in doing so. But I changed his room when he was about 2. We moved into our own apartment and it was time. He adjusted pretty well. He still calls me in the middle of the night at times, and I bring him into my bed as well. I think a part of it is me just giving in. But I really dont mind. I know its hard to break that habit once it starts but sometimes its just to easy to just put him with me. Privacy, whats that !I never have that anyway. But I think he will be ok. It takes time, but I made it a big deal. You know, the whole " I love your big boy bed"......Good luck

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A.B.

answers from Washington DC on

K.,

Is there room for you put up a toddler bed in the same room as your son's crib? I bought my son one of the beds that is very low to the floor and looks like a race car and set it up in his room. I let him play on it and he started putting himself in it to take naps. Then he asked me if he could sleep in it rather than in his "baby bed" . I, of course, said yes! I don't know if this will work for you, but it certainly helped me! It also helped with potty training because he was able to get out of his bed by himself and go to the potty. The only thing you may have to watch out for is to put a baby gate either at the top of your steps or at the door to his room if you don't want him wandering around at night! Jonathan grew out of that pretty quick but I kept a gate at the top of the steps until he was almost 4, just in case! I hope this helps! Good luck with your son!

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K.B.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son was 2 yrs old and 1 month when we took him out of his crib. Up until that time he never climbed out either. He had surgery at that age. Bilateral hernia surgery and the day after surgery he started climbing out of his crib so we switched him to a big boy bed. My daughter who is older than him has been in a big bed since she was 15 months old. She was the climber. If you do make the switch I would put a babygate in the doorway. Thats what we did becuase we didnt want him to get up during the night and fall down the stairs. The doorway is a better idea to have the gate that way you dont have to block all the other rooms you dont want him in upstairs, like bathroom stairs and what not. 9 times out of 10 if he gets up he will cry for you or let u know like he does now that he wants you but you can never be to careful. If you want to make the switch then go ahead. If you want to wait and see how he takes it keep both the crib and bed up if you can and let him choose which he would like to sleep in. We went right to a twin size bed. but toddler beds are good also(my daughter used this until she was almost 3) If you are looking to only buying one more bed a twin would be the best way to go.

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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

It's completely a personal/family decision. My daughter loved her crib and was perfectly happy in it. She stayed in it until she was 3 (moved her right at her third birthday in Sept) and really would have stayed longer without any complaints I think. She was only 17 months when my son was born so we borrowed an extra crib because we felt she was too young for a big bed at that point. She was potty trained during the day and was working on nighttime - though until about a week or two ago, she wouldn't get out of her big girl bed until my husband or I went in to get her. My son will also be 2 at the end of next month. He also loves his crib and has never attempted climbing out. He will be moving out of the nursery by May because I am due with another baby then. We still have the borrowed crib and thought about using it in his new room like we did with my daughter, but he'll be about 10 months older than my daughter was when he was born. He likes his big sister's bed and we have access to a themed toddler bed from a family member. We bought the extra crib mattress when borrowed the crib so we've decided to put him in the toddler bed when he moves to his big boy room. The room isn't ready and we're not in a big hurry to get him out of the crib so we're not rushing. But he'll be in it by the time he's about 27 months to make room for baby.

I had a friend who's daughter climbed out constantly. I think they moved her to a toddler bed around 14 months. My neice moved out of her crib probably around 18 months. If he is happy in his crib, he still fits comfortably in it and you are happy with him there, I see no reason to change things. If you have a particular reason to move him - he doesn't like it, is climbing out, need it for another child, etc, then he's perfectly capable of handling a toddler or big bed too. Having them in a crib does allow you to keep him contained for a little while even if he does wake up (as long as he's not climbing out) and there is a possibility that he'll get up if he wakes in the middle of the night and wander. You can put up a gate or keep his door shut (actually better for fire safety) to at least keep him in his room. You will want to make sure that his room is completely baby proofed in case he would wake and play at night.

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C.N.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hello..
I have a 2 yr old son and just recently changed him over to a big boy bed. He never climbed out of his crib or was upset that he was in one for that long. That is until he was admitted to the Children's Hospital for dehydration from the stomach flu. After he came home he was very upset when I put him in his crib. I think that your child will dictate when he's ready. He may feel more secure in his crib than he would in a big boy bed. I hope this helps

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N.

answers from Philadelphia on

K. -

I think your son will be just fine in a "big boy" bed... just go with one that has the "rails" on the side - or a "toddler bed" (so you can just use the crib mattress & don't have the added expense of a new mattress yet). The toddler beds are a good transition into a "regular" bed for kids. They give them the feeling of having a "big boy" bed, but yet it's more size appropriate for toddlers. My son was in a "toddler" bed at about 17 months, and we never had any problems. He's 5-1/2 now and has been in a full size bed (not just a twin) since he was 4 years old.
And the other nice thing about the "toddler beds" is that they aren't real expensive. I say make the switch now... maybe do it as a "surprise" for your son's birthday! Tell him "Now that you're 2, you are getting to be a big boy, so you need a 'big boy' bed!" really play it up, and that should make him more excited about the "change".
Good luck!

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B.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

I am the mother of an 18yr old,16yr old, and a 14 yr old. Your son is not to young for a big boy bed, if you worry about him rolling out get him a guard that slides under the matress. He will be just fine, u can't always baby them gotta let them grow up.
good luck buffyg Giles

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M.N.

answers from Lancaster on

No both my children were in their own bed by 1. My daughter now 8 was in her own room, and slept therw the night. Now my sons bed is in our room, but he too sleeps threw the night. With my daughter, I switched her because she was able to get out of her crib. With my son he never went in a crib. I swithched him when he was to big for a bassinet. They both did fine. Just make it fun for them and encourage them to pick out bedding, mine also have a favorite stuffed animal.
If you want to know anymore feel free to ask...Hope some of this helps.

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L.A.

answers from Philadelphia on

I think you should move him into a big boy bed. My daughter is 3 and I put her in a toddler bed when she was 2. She moved around so much that it got to small for her so now she is in a full size bed. She will only get out of it during the night to wake me when she needs to go to the bathroom. I think I gives her more independance and she loves it.

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S.G.

answers from Saginaw on

My oldest daughter was a pain in the butt when it came to bed. She would cry, scream, kick, and throw temper tantrums, she would throw her favorite stuffed animal out and then scream for him. Needled to say she stayed in a crib until she fingured out how to get out. My youngest, who is almost 18 months old, goes to sleep wonderfully everynight. Ok, my point is, kids are different and if you think your son is ready than let him try it. FOr a few nights you could even throw his mattress on the floor and see how he does before you buy and assemble the bed. At night make sure you have a gate up in his bedroom door or blocking where ever it is that you don't want him to be able to get to. My oldest daughter's bedroom is right across the hall from ours so we blocked the hall way with a gate so if she got up she had to either be in our room or her room. Good luck!

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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I would go ahead and move him to a toddler bed. I thought my son wasn't showing any interest in climbing out of his crib, until I went to pick him up at the sitters. When I went in the bedroom, he had a leg up over the side. YIKES! My thought is move him before he shows interest and falls.

We didn't really lose any freedom. His room was already baby proofed, so he couldn't get into anything that would hurt him if he got up. We put a doorknob guard on the knob in his room, so he couldn't get out in the middle of the night and wander the house. They're relatively cheap -- like $5 for two at Target, Wal-Mart, etc.

I still keep a monitor in his room so I can hear when he is up. I thought he would be in and out of bed a lot at first, but he really was good about it. Lately, he's been getting up after we put him to bed to sit in his chair and read books by his nightlight. I just watch the time and if it starts to get too late, go in and tell him its time to go to bed. He never fights me on it.

Good luck!

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T.H.

answers from York on

I have a 2 1/2 year old who climbed out of his crib at 16 months. We ent out and bought him a toddler bed that day. He got into it that night and never looked back at his crib. The only thing I would caution you on is that if he isn't climbing out he may not be ready to go to a toddler bed. he may like the security of his crib. If you want to move him still then I would suggest that you start hyping it up by taking him to the store letting him pick out a toddler bed and maybe a set of new sheets and a pillow to go with his new bed. Sit down and talk to him about it and show him what you want to get him. Tell him that he is becoming such a big boy and that you think he deserves a new bed. He'll tell you what he wants. Also if you do get him a new bed you need to leave the crib in his room for about a week so that he can gradually get use to it. Some kids will start transitioning to the toddler bed by only taking naps in it and still going to bed in the crib. Give him time and he will adjust. He may even surprise you and go straight to the toddler bed and never want the crib again. the only suggestion I can give you with the freedom he will get by going to a toddler bed is if he gets up in the middle of the night and comes in to your room you have to take him back to his room and tell him that he needs to sleep in his bed and that big boys sleep in their own beds. It will only last maybe 2 days. It dosen't take long for them to adjust. Hope that this helps. If you need anyhting else just ask.

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J.H.

answers from Allentown on

I think it depends on the child, but it sounds like your son would be fine in a big bed. My daughter is 2 now and has been in a twin bed with a side rail since she was 16 months old. She would never sleep in her crib so we just decided to try a bed instead of not sleeping at all. It worked out very well for us, even though many of my relatives thought I was crazy to move her so early. She loves her big bed and never gets out of in in the middle of the night, if she needs something she just calls out for me. Good luck to you, and just go with what you feel is right for you and your son.

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C.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi K.. My daughter was 1 1/2 when she moved into a big girl bed and both of my nephews were 2 years old when they moved to big boy beds. You have to use your judgement on when you feel he is ready to move to a big boy bed. You can always try it and see how he does and move him back to the crib if he doesn't do well in the big boy bed. I hope everything works out.

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N.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

my oldest was in a single bed at age 2 when he crawled out of the crib. my youngest is 14 months and he has never wanted to sleep in a crib, he has slept in a toddler bed or single bed since 7 months and he has never gotten hurt.

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S.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

He is not too young for a big boy bed. My son was 15 months when he was ready. Put a gate at his bedroom door and you should have no worries about him getting into something he shouldn't if he gets out of bed. Put a couple safe toys in his bedroom he can play with. For an extra measure of peace of mind, let him know he should still call you when he wakes up.

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L.D.

answers from Washington DC on

When my son was about the same age I had the same questions. My husband and I started out with just taking the side off of the crib to see what Noah would do. Every night we would put him down and he would go to sleep. When he wanted us he would call us, he never opened the door and came out. We eventually got the big boy bed and he hasn't ever needed to go back to the crib. My personal opinion though is that you skip the toddler bed, unless you can get a hand me down, because they are a waste of money and just go straight to the twin size bed. If you have to get just the mattress and put it on th floor that works just fine.

If your son does start to come out you can just put a gate in his doorway so that he can't get out but he can open the door.

I know it worked for us and we plan on doing it with our daughter now in a few more months.

I hope my humble but personal experience and advice has helped

L.

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B.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

My oldest loved her crib so we kept her in it until she was potty trained around the clock, about 2.5 years old. She really wasn't ready for the bed but she needed access to the potty. She adapted but my child who went down with no problems suddenly became my child who needed someone to hold her hand while she fell asleep.

My second child was out of the crib by 15 months because she kept climbing out and I was afraid she would get hurt. She loved her bed and was definitely ready for it.

My third child was a climber too but I had found a tent that goes over the crib. I kept him in there until he could open the tent and climb out, he was about 2 years old. He loved being in the bed but he also loved getting out of the bed. It took a long time before he fully understood that he needed to stay in it.

My point is that every child is different. Honestly, if he is happy in there I wouldn't move him. There is no need to rush things if he is not climbing out and doesn't use the potty at night time.

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J.L.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I K., moms dont always know best and dont always give the best advice although to them they are. And I know they do it with love. I have 7 children, 4 which are my own and 3 adopted. I never set a age where they had to be out of the crib and into a big boy or big girl bed. I think they are each different and do things at different ages. For me one was in a big girl bed at two but others around three. As long as they were not trying to climb out I let them stay. And I also put hte bed down on the lowest it would go and left the side down, that way if they did try to crawl out it wasnt really that far. I know I liked the sec. of knowing they were in the crib and not easily able to just get up and wonder around the house while I was asleep. That thought always scared me. I would say when you feel the time is right then he is ready. Sounds like you are doing a great job. I do want to add since this sounds like your first. Potty training, boys dont start to do that as early as girls, girls ususally around 2 yrs but my boy and my nephews were later closer to 2.5-3. Good luck

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B.R.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have 4 children, the first two are 20 months apart, numbers 2 and 3 are 20 months apart as well. We didn't really have a choice because we didn't want to have to buy another crib. My advice to you...if you're ready, but the bed and maybe keep it in the same room as the crib. Your son may run screaming or take to it right away. You never know until you try. Are you ready to move your son to a big boy bed? Another bit of advice...forgo the toddler bed. He'll grow out of that in a few years and you'll have to spend again to get a regular twin bed for him.

Good luck to you!!

B.

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I.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

no it not but you can waite till he 2 1/2 years old if you wan .
my great nephew is 2 and be 3in july and he has a queen size bed.
im not saying you have to get your son that big of a bed but he can move up to the next size

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B.M.

answers from Scranton on

HI! My daughter was 17 months(baby on the way) when we moved her to big girl bed. It was definately an adjustment at first, we got bed rails but she didn't really need them. My son however was nearly three before he was moved, for no other reason than we didn't have a reason to move him. They were both fine, both great sleepers now and always have been. Maybe putting the big bed up in the room along with his crib and let him get the idea to sleep in the bed on his own might pay off. You sound like you have your head on straight, you will do what's right for you and your baby. Think about it and if it seems like the right thing to do, do it. Good luck.

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K.B.

answers from Allentown on

I also have a 2 year old (turned 2 in December). She's still in her crib and really likes it and feels safe in it. I'm in no rush to put her into a big girl bed. My recommendation is if your son starts climbing out of his crib, move him to a bed b/c of risk of injury. Hope this helps.
K.

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D.B.

answers from Dover on

Hi K.,

No, it's not too early for Aidan. The question is whether or not YOU want him in a big bed. If yes, it sounds like Aidan can handle it. If you're feeling pressured to keep him in his crib, remember that you're the mom and you get to decide, knowing you'll make decisions that work for you and Aidan.

I know it's hard to be the mom of a little one--everyone with older kids feels compelled to tell you what will work, not remembering each child is different. : ) My own mother does the same thing--I just say, "Mmmmm hmmm" and do what I think is right. lol

Sounds like you've got a good idea of what will work for your child, so go with your instinct!!

D.

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R.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

K.,
it might sound strange.. but did you ask him? I would say if it seems like something he is ready for.. and your not afraid he is going to fall out of bed.. go for it.. i was told when i went looking for beds that alot of parents started with a twin mattress set and put it on the floor.. that way if they do fall out its not far... puting one side against the wall has ups and downs.. but keeping it close to the ground is most likely the best measure.. i would say if he is tall enough to climb into his own bed.. and compedent in that.. then go for it.. just be sure to remind him that this is HIS bed.. make it a refuge for him.. (faviorate color or charachter sheets) the fun begins with a bed.. its a big transition.. but not to big that it cant be overcome with love and patience.. reminding him how he is now a "big boy" will help.. but im getting ahead of my self now..
I would say if you feel like he is ready for a little independence..go for it.. and your right about your freedom.. its not gone.. its just not serving you immediatly.. now your freedom is invested in your son.. sort of like the men and women who go to war.. they give up alot of personal freedoms for the benefit of others (im not sure how many will take that with such varried oppinions on our current war situation) but when it all boils down.. thats what you have.. you had a baby.. and now your dreams, freedoms, and hopes are invested in that baby.. but the rewards are wonderfull.. you get to first hand experience them growing up.. exploring the world.. and all that love they give back.. wow
anywho.. i would say follow your gut.. talk with your son.. and always do the right thing..
God Bless
rs

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M.P.

answers from Washington DC on

My 23 mnth old twin girls sleep in separate cribs. They do sleep on my bed sometimes. Although you may think your son is ready for a big boy bed - you probably know best what his sleeping style is, whether he moves about a lot, etc. - remember that at about this age, they start having dreams and nightmares. Alos, they a re now a lot more active, more aware of what's going on about them, they take in more at this age, and all this goes through their minds when they are asleep. Perhaps consider a big boy bed with kiddie guard rails, but definitely not one without any safety features.

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L.N.

answers from Washington DC on

K., i agree with your mom and i will state the reasons for it.
the transition from crib to a big bed will give your son freedom of movement. i am sure he already knows how to open the door, therefore chances are he will be doing that and coming to your bed. that's when you'll lose your freedom :)
on the other hand, if he is getting too big for the crib then yes you might have to swtich him, and even if you do so, there are things you could do to help him getting used to staying in his room in his bed when bedtime comes.
i had to switch my girls when they turned about 27 months because they had gotten out of their cribs a few times starting from when they turned 20 months. only a few times but enough for me to realize it was time. i did delay as much as i could.
so, anyways, when i did switch them to toddler beds (full size beds seemed enormous that's why i got toddler beds for now), i got them each a stuffed animal (tigger). talked to them that night how tigger is tired, and needs to cuddle and asked the girls to take care of tiggers. also, considering what two year old listens to mom, i got a gate that i put right outside their bedroom door.
they were awesome the first two months. now even attempts to open the door. now they do, but there is the gate and they play a bit in their room and then they go to their own beds and fall asleep. just before i turn in for the night i go in their room cover them if necessary and that's it.
i have never brought them in bed with me. never, first reason being when they were little was SIDS. secondly i had heard stories about cooslepping and did not want us to go through that.
now, on occassions when girls are sick, i put an airmatress in their room and i sleep in there. they sitll sleep in their own beds but i stay there for as long as they're sick to make sure they're fine.
so bottom line is for us at least the gate was of tremendous help, also the stuffed animal because they have something for security.
now for swtiching him to a bigger bed is your call. if he is getting physically too big for the crib or if he starts attemtping getting out of the crib i say it's time. otherwise try to delay it as much as possible.
good luck
vlora

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R.R.

answers from Reading on

I dont think it is. I have my son sleep with me when hes sick & hes 1.

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