If You Could Go Back to Your Pre-mom Self, What Advice Would You Give?

Updated on September 15, 2010
K.S. asks from Huntington Beach, CA
9 answers

So I saw this touching video (see link below to see video) about what advice moms would give to their pre-mom selves.

Of course I knew right away what I would tell myself: "it's ok not to be superwoman, ask for help" and "the depression is real, you're not crazy, tell someone".

But it got me thinking, you all sound like wonderful caring moms, what advice would you give yourself?

~K.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taDqKWWPDAY&feature=yo...

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Start haivng kids sooner. Starting at 31 is too late and too difficult especially if you want a big family!

AND

You are good at saving money, but it still isn't enough. Save, save, save!

4 moms found this helpful

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

Enjoy that body now! LOL!
The cleaning can wait.

5 moms found this helpful
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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

I never expected to be diagnosed with cancer after my second child's birth (she was 10.5 weeks old, it was the day before my son's 2nd birthday).

My one regret is not banking their cord blood. I never assumed we'd really need it. Should I have a recurrence, my only option is a stem cell transplant, and the cord blood could be a source of a life-saving cure.

Otherwise, my only other advice would be to focus more on them and less on things like work. However, I think we balance it well. Cancer opened my eyes to the person/mom I wanted to be, and I make a concerted effort every day to be as present as possible for both kids' sake.

3 moms found this helpful
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R.S.

answers from New York on

I would tell my pre mom self to take care of my body more. I took for granted that I was able to get away with horrible eating habits and still be thin. I assumed I would be like that forever...that is, until I had a baby. Having a kid made me understand what it is like to really not have time to work out. I was so full of excuses then.

The other thing I would tell myself...get out there and have fun! I used to actually think that if you dated a lot or had a lot of boyfriends, you could be labelled as "slutty," -- so I would date only a few guys and would find myself in these long, drama filled relationships. How boring and stressful. If I could do it all over again, I would definitely date more, go out more, have more fun in my younger years (of course preserving my integrity as a lady). That way, I could look back on those years and say, wow, how much fun I had. Now, I am a mom and a wife...I don't know, the idea of dancing on tables at club is for me awkward and inappropriate today. I should have done it then.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.M.

answers from Asheville on

I second Christy's response!!!!! 'Enjoy that body now!!'

This is a really great question and thanks for posting it. And hope it can be useful for many.

There are probably lots of little things I might consider, but the one thing that seems to be the key for me is that I would step back and take time to know myself in a deeper sort of way - to ask myself what it is I really want in my life and how do I want to BE in life. I think that' so important to have as an anchor so that when the fast pace of life happens and we get pulled in so many directions, that we have a steady place of assurance and reassurance to come back to help keep in mind what's really important to us.

I have a wonderful family and I know I did my best everyday. But I also know had I taken time to take better care of myself, which includes communication effectively how I feel and the things that are important to me, I could have been there in a different way for my kids, my husband, myself and for our family.

Thanks for the question. It's an important one.

2 moms found this helpful
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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Fun question. I watched it, and agreed with most of them, except "Mom was right."

Anyway, there are too many things I would tell myself, it's hard to pick one. I think the main piece of advice I would give is:

This will be over sooner than you think: enjoy it, because any day could be the last time they do this one thing.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.L.

answers from Boise on

Unfortunately, I would tell myself to RUN AWAY!!! My husband has made our lives living Hell for the past 5 years. I could probably leave him if I didn't have three kids to take care of.

Sad, I know.

I would also tell myself to never miss a chance to make a new friend, and to go to all those dumb game nights I was invited to. It was dumb that they required a $10 gift, but I need friends more than I need $10.

1 mom found this helpful

D.M.

answers from Denver on

I second "enjoy that body now"! I also second "start sooner", though 31 sounds like a fine age to me (I started at 39!)

I was married and pregnant pretty much all in one go, so I'd also say, "Most men are a waste of your time. Date less and spend more time on what YOU really want to be doing!"

1 mom found this helpful
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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Sleep now because you won't again until the child is 2 years old. LOL I guess the best advice we received before our daughter was born was invest in a good camera, because you won't want to miss a thing.

1 mom found this helpful
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