I Need My Space

can I go with you? Pretty please with sugar on top??? Oh my gosh I feel like this every day. I get up early, go to work where I handle client problems and internal problems and system problems. Ugh!! And then I get home and handle home problems and so and so did not do this and she did this other thing that she shouldn't have and she or he and .......
I go to bed late every night and get up early every day and seem to be the only person in the house (sometimes want to insert an expletive before house) that can actually do anything. Yes I feel like running away. And it is a lot more often lately.

And then the guilt trip comes on becasue I do love my family. But some time for myself would be soooooooooo nice

When I feel like that I remind myself that my problems are SO petty compared to what some people have to face, and I say a prayer of thanksgiving.

You have a successful career, your daughter has a successful career, and your husband also has a successful career, and is home to spend time with his family.

Sorry, I don't see the problem.

Take a hot bath, read a book, and count your blessings. :)

I also need a LOT time to myself, I have always been this way, ever since I was a little girl, I have needed to escape the family noise and find a quiet, private place to be alone, usually with a book.
And your job sounds like my worst nightmare, that must be so exhausting!!!
Of course you can always take off on the weekend, do whatever it is you like to do. For me that would be a good work out, browsing through used bookstores, hitting up a good sale at one of my favorite stores, reading in a quiet, urban coffee shop (fewer kids around, lol!) getting a pedicure or just wandering around in the city.
When I need some "me" time at home I'll find a project away from the rest of the family, usually in the yard or garage, I'll put on my ipod and get to work. In the evening I'll run a bath, light some candles and sit and soak with a glass of wine, no one bugs me in there :)
You need the time, just take it, without guilt!

Yep! My kids have been home from school since the end of May. They're not doing camps or anything, so I have been on duty 24/7 for two months. I love being with them, but as an introvert, I get tired if I don't have opportunities for time to myself. I'm quite run down.

Absolutely. And then I hear a story much worse than mine. It doesn't mean I can't feel like I want to run away and hide from it all, but I consider myself lucky.

I'd go out by yourself for a bit. Grab a coffee or take a walk. Even a night! My mom did that not too long ago and I think it helped her tremendously! I may give myself a weekend alone when I finish my MBA!!

All together now - "Mom's Night Out time!!".

For me, and for many people (from what I've heard), alone time is essential to sanity. It doesn't mean that you don't appreciate your blessings or the good people in your life, just that you need some solitude. I swim regularly (3 times a week), and that's part of my recharge time. Also, I started attending yoga classes once or twice a week 2 years ago, and that's become very important to my sanity. Yes, there are other people in the room during the class, however it's all about doing the poses as works best for YOU as the instructor gently leads everyone. Oh, and it ends with lying down to rest for a while in a quiet environment! Even though I don't spend the class thinking about whatever is bothering me, I often get some new insights or peace during that time. Anyway, I know that for me, going to swim or yoga is key to my sanity. Have fun finding a place or activity which restores you!

Oh yes, I know how you feel! Some days it just seems like I can't do enough for EVERYONE! When I start feeling overwhelmed like that, I lock myself in my room, take a hot, quiet bath and then watch a movie. By the time I'm done, I'm feeling much better. And my family knows when I lock myself in that they've gone a bit too far and they are very nice when I come out and THEY can't do enough for ME!

I think everyone feels that some time or another! Doesn't matter if you are male/ female... adult/ teen/ child.

When I get that way I will go fishing. I take along a book and just sit out there and not care if Im catching anything or not. Its just nice and relaxing to be outside with the only sound of nature around me. After an afternoon of it, it helps so much. I can get lost in the book, sit and think about what has been bothering me... just look out at the nature and get lost in my own thoughts... what ever I want to do!

My mom goes shopping, my dad hiking or fishing.

My husband will lock himself in a room and play his guitar for hours.

My kids will either go upstairs to their rooms or go for a walk or bike ride.

You need to find what you like to do that calms you down when you feel like that.. then go do it and not feel guilty at all when you do it!

lol it sounds like you have the same personality type as me. ppl drain me. like when i go shopping and i look at all the nick nacks and talk to alot of people even if its only for an hour i feel like i need a nap after. i need a lot of down time. usually a nap will bring me back to life. but even visiting with family makes me just want to escape and its emotionally draining even if its a happy day with lots of laughter. go see a movie by yourself or to the library, go to a coffee shop some where quite and peaceful with not many ppl . even though the movie has lots of people its quiet and dark. things i really enjoy. why not take a mini vacation? your daughter and husband are self suffent. i would take a day and go to natural bridge caverns or a wine orchard. farmers market. i like strangers in small quanities. whats the difference in having a shopping day or going to visit a relaxing place. or spa. its ok. most likely you have had this feeling since childhood? i sure have. when a friend would spend the night and stay another night by sunday evening i was sick of them and couldnt wait till they went home!!! take a break for the better of the entire family.

ALL THE TIME! :)

I generally do not like people....I'm not completely anti-social, but I would much rather be alone than with a group. I have the kids from 6 AM until 9 PM every single freaking day. Thankfully, hubby goes to bed at 9 as well so from 9 PM on it's ME time. I watch tv or sometimes just sit outside and watch the stars. I find that those few hours are very rejuvenating!

YES! Every day I get out for a walk. I real walk and I don't invite any of my colleagues to come with me. I don't need an hour for lunch (even when I have to run an errand or 2), so I eat and then throw on my sneakers and power walk for a half hour. That's my "brain break" and I don't give it up for anything... except the rain like today!

You most definitely need some time to yourself - absolutely guilt-free and on a regular basis. I just wanted to comment on the role of HR. I, too, am an HR Manager and understand how you are expected to solve everyone's problems. It took me a long time to realize it, but it is not HR's job to fix everyone's problems. It is HR's job to give people the tools to fix their own problems. It's still a difficult position to be in, especially if you're a "helper" like most of us are. You have to try to become more detached from people's problems. It's very similar to having kids. You teach them what they are supposed to do, but they have to do to it themselves. In fact you are doing them a disservice if you do everything for them - same thing with managers and employees. I could go on and on about the role of HR, but I will stop. I hope you take some time for yourself. It's an absolute necessity.

I feel like this a lot, especially this summer. My hubby is now retired with disability and my kids are staying home with him over the summer. When I get home from work, EVERYONE is ready for mommy time (except me). Suggestions to help you would be to 1)Stop by a restaurant/library/book store and just chill out by yourself before going home. 2)Get a mani/pedi either over lunch over after work 3)Talk with your daughter about the situation and see if you can come up with times that are "NO TALKING" times (like for 1 hour in the evening so you can wind down). Hope this helps. It's helped me a lot.

While I definitely see the value in counting your blessings, needing some time to yourself isn't petty at all!

Do you have a place in your home that you can go to and just say, "I'll see you all in an hour or two - I'm off to recharge!"? Have a nice cup of coffee (or a whole pot), a nice glass of wine (or two!), read a book, do yoga, sing, journal, or do whatever relaxes you.

My mom and dad had my sister and her family living with them until my BIL finished school. My parents LOVED having them but to maintain healthy relationships they all had to find their personal space on a regular basis. Decide what will do that for you and don't feel guilty about taking some time for yourself!

Hugs!