I'm feeling a little strange to know that my Grandma has a "boyfriend" She is in her mid 70's and my grandfather died several years ago. They were married over 50 years. She did go through a depression after my grandfather passed away. Okay, I went to her house the other day and there were candels burning and the lights were low. I shocked and outdone. He left shortly after my sister and I arrived. I have seen him over before and I asked my mom who in the world is that. She said that it was an old friend. But grandma never says anything to us about him she did not even explain to us why she had candles buring and who he is.
Also, she does baby sit for me twice a week and now I'm thinking that she would rather be on the phone with with this man than to watch my son.(LOL) I now I sound pathetic and I'm a grown women with a family of my own. She suppose to be in our business not having something like this going on. LOL
Thanks for your responses. You all are right. I am extremly lucky to have her. It was just a surprise. I do want her to be happy. I suppose its not serious since she did not introduce us. Maybe she feels uncomfortable and does not know what our reaction would be. She also has four sons and I guess she does not want to get into it with them either.
What's the big deal? Why on earth would she have to explain anything? she's a grown woman! You should be happy for her, if she's happy she'll live longer.
Sorry but, your grandma does not have to explain a thing to you. She raised her kids and now it is her turn to enjoy her life as long as she can. When you stop and think about it, we have it so much easier then our parents and grandparents. They did a great job with manners,respect,cooking, morals to name a few. They worked harder at home with far less to work with. I say go granny. You and your children are lucky to have her, enjoy her while you can.
While you may have mixed feelings about this, I say good for her. It's not like she jumped right into it or something and why shouldn't she have someone to share her remaining years with! My grandpa had a girlfriend before he died and it was nice to see him smiling again and having fun. You surely have the right to have mixed feelings, but if you're wondering what's going on, why not ask her?
I say...Good for her! I really hope my life doesn't end at 70. At some point I hope I can make my own decisions and live my life for me...not my kids, my husband, my mom, my sister or the lady down the street. But how lucky for you that she does offer to watch your children and was thoughtful enough not to involve you in her relationship (which you obviously have issues with). I would suggest that if you really want to be involved in her life...you might start a conversation with..."it is so nice to see you happy again grandma..." Hopefully she lives many more years and continues to enjoy the simple things in life....like candles.
I think thats great! My Father in Law died five years ago and my mother in law is so depressed that she never goes anywhere,doesn't want visitors even us and the kids. We try to get her to do things and get out but she always has an excuse about being sick and dying, my kids never even really formed a relationship with her. They don't want to hug her she doesn't play with them or anything, she's just another old lady they have over every holiday that gives them money. I think everyone deserves a right to be happy and enjoy companionship so they are not lonely, imagine sitting in your house all alone every day waiting for someone to call or stop by. It could drive a person nuts after about a year! Get to know him and don't worry about your kids if she wants time off I'm sure she'll tell you.
GOOD FOR HER, WHY SHOULD SHE LIVE HER THE REST OF HER DAYS ALONE. If she wants companionship wiht another then let her be.. If she takes fine care of your son, then don't make a big deal over. Let her live, its better then her being depressed right ?
Good luck and just be happy for her
Happy Holidays
C-
Stop, step back, and take a look around. I bet she is happier than you have seen her in a while. My Grandma lived alone for so many years, and it was sad. Maybe engage her in a conversation about him. It could bring your relationship with her to whole new level. My Grandma was someone I loved to gossip with, you might really enjoy it too!!
My great-grandfather lost his wife sometime around the time he also lost his brother. He and his sister-in-law took up residence together as companions until he passed on at 97 and she at 99 1/2 - more than 30 years. I never thought anything about it because that's just the way it was. They had always enjoyed each other's company, so it was natural for them to live together. And they had candles around the house....... ;)
If your grandmother has "an old friend", perhaps it's just the companionship that she's seeking. Or if she's seeking something else..... 70 is the new 50's. People still have feelings and attractions into their 70's (my parents are celebrating their 50th this year and are still affectionate) so be happy that she's found some new happiness after surviving her husband's passing. She'e not ready to give up loving and simply settle for memories....would you?
She can still be in your business and have something going on, you have multiple things in your life, her life can't be all you and your kids, my grandma has a companion is what she calls him, she has no intention to get re-married mostly cause they are set in their ways, but she goes out to dinner with him everynight and the weekends they take a break from one another, this probably gives her some happiness and great self esteem, don't bother her about it just be supportive even if you don't like it, its what she wants that matters
