Help! My One Year Old Is Still Waking up 2+ Times a Night :(

I am a HUGE advocate of sleep training. I would let your neighbour know that you are going to start. Explain that it may be a rough week, but in the long run it'll be worth it for you and her, and your baby. If children don't learn to fall asleep by themselves, this could go on for the next 4+ years!

I have some friends that didn't do it either because they live on the top floor of their hotel. Now they've just thrown in the towel and sleep in their children's room! 4 of them all together! Completely nuts! There 4 1/2 yr old and 2 yr old still wake up in the night and have to be cuddled to sleep.

I have to say there is nothing I have done better than sleep training my 2. It WASN'T easy! Be prepared for lots of crying. You will hate yourself and feel guilty. I started when mine was 8 months because he started waking up more and more until it was 5 times a night and he wanted the boob. They don't need the boob! They have the ability at that age to sleep through the night if they have a good meal before bedtime. Mine cried 2 1/2 hours the first night. I closed the doors between us, openned the windows to mask the cries and turned the tv on full volume. If you listen to them you die. The next night he didn't cry at all!

There are many ways to do it. Choose what's right for you and your child. With my 1st, I fed and when he was almost asleep, pulled out the boob and put in a soother and put him into his own bed. If he cried, I'd do it again, boob, pull out, bed, until they are so exhausted they don't complain anymore. The important part is that they fall asleep without it on their own. (better if you don't use a soother, but with my 1st I had too. Eventually you have to rid them of that too)

Hope you have the courage to give it a try! Your neighbour will only hate you for a few days!

Kids go through many things that might disrupt their sleep patterns. She may be going through a growth spurt, where she will chow down right before and after the spurt. But 2 weeks is a bit long. If you nursed her back to sleep during a teething bout, she now associates that need to be able to fall back asleep. As far as sleep training, talk to your neighbors and let them know what's going on and what you would like to do. Inquire if there might be a better time, maybe they are going on vacation in a week. They will appreciate you for being considerate of their sleep needs. In the meantime, have you tried rocking when she wakes, does she take a nook? Is your husband able to help you at night, if you have milk in the fridge or if she takes formula (not my preference), ask him to help you. If you had depression issues in the past, then get help with the sleep thing now - before it becomes a larger issue! Sleep when she sleeps, ask your husband to let you sleep in on the weekends, ask him to take over some household duties for awhile. You'll make it through, I totally understand - my son didn't consistently sleep through the night until he was almost 2, then we had a newborn!

Going through the same thing with dd who will be 1 in a few days and you have to nip it now or it will be a horrible habit harder and harder to break as time goes on. My dd is on a bottle she's battling a double ear infection and teething so I've let her have whatever she wants the last few days but either tonight or tomorrow night I'm taking the bottle away. Letting her scream it out, she will probaly be like my older daughter and just have a few rough nights and be over it. Just warn your neighbor and do it. Maybe sleep train your baby in another room of the house in a play pen or something.

My daughter was still waking up 2-4 times at that age, it's hard but some kids just developmentally have trouble sleeping through for whatever reason. Of course it doesn't last forever and if you are patient she will probably end up night weaning herself later on. Letting her cry it out will likely just make her more angry, frustrated, clingy, and depressed. Don't do it!

I'm assuming you are co-sleeping? That would make the two feedings easier on you both and she will probably go to sleep faster. You could try shortening each feeding (if she allows) or try to unlatch her when she is done actively eating. I really don't think it's uncommon for breastfed babies to need 1-2 feedings over night for some time. Their food digests so fast and they don't tend to overeat so they aren't going to stuff themselves before bed to sleep through. I learned to just sleep through the feedings and for me the added benefit was delayed fertility (as well as a happy, secure, and healthy toddler). Breastmilk really is the best milk for them period regardless if they are 1,2, or even 3. Switching to another form of milk will do nothing.

My daughter cut back quite a bit around 2 and between about 25 and 26 months really understood me when I told her it was too early to nurse and she had to go back to sleep. She now goes 8-10 hours without nursing (at 29m) and it was pretty painless for everyone!

Hang in there and cherish this time with your daughter. Nap with her and know that you are helping her become a secure and independent child.

Did you daughter recently start walking? My son, who had been a great sleeper for many months at that point, had a period of sleeping poorly just after he started walking. I had to stay with him in his room until he was asleep both at night and for his nap. I just figured it was a phase, and it was - it lasted a couple of weeks (I gradually started leaving the room earlier and earlier) and then he was back to falling asleep and sleeping fine on his own.

Buy your neighbor some soundproof ear headphones. But you also may need to cut down on naps during the day....which can take some time adjusting....she may be a "bear" and the bewitching hour can be hell.....but she should sleep better during the night. Also make sure to get her out for an evening walk in the fresh air.........this helps sleep also.

So cut down the naps, solid food at night before bed......not too much liquid because this could wake her up in the middle of the night to pee. And maybe have dad get her when she cries....he doesn't have the milk.

Any change is difficult....but try looking at it wholistically....at the entire day and night routine and see what can be changed to help her through the transitions.

This is absolutely normal for a one-year-old. She's still a baby and gets hungry. No need to "nip this in the bud". It's very likely she will grow out of the need in a few months. My daughter woke up every night at 1 a.m. and 5 a.m. until suddenly at 13 months she stopped waking up in the night to eat. If you are exhausted and angry, take naps with her during the day, check your diet, get some fresh air and exercise, and ask your husband to help out more.

I don't know that weaning will help. I weaned my 20 month old at 11 months old from the bottle and while he will sleep through the night sometimes, there are just so many other reasons for them to wake up that it's only part of the equation.

He doesn't wake up now to nurse/take a bottle, but he does wake up because he's got gas, or a cold, or got scared, or woke up naturally and just refused to sleep without someone next to him.

Sleep training is probably the best option, but like you I have a hard time doing that even though we have no neighbors to bother.

It is a phase, they will grow out of it (I keep telling myself anyway).

Good luck!
L.

I have 4 children and one on the way. I've nursed all my babies into their toddler years. My experience is that it's very normal for a 1 yr old to wake up at night especially if he/she is still nursing. I had trouble with my first child and not getting sleep, so we started co-sleeping with him and that solved our problem. He's 14 now and of course those little years now seem so short.

We've slept with all our babies - I know it's not for everyone; however, if sleep is that important to you, then you might consider other options. Maybe your baby is just going through a growth spurt and needs more nutrition for a short period of time. Is he active during the day and not eating much? I would think about his daytime schedule and maybe you can adjust it so he will sleep better at night. I would also give him a hearty snack before bedtime.

When I first started parenting I did all the "right" things, baby in crib, on schedule...etc.... - now I laugh at those books because in my opinion they set parents up for failure. Some babies come into the world and are really easy - good eaters and sleepers. My 2nd child was very easy. I found out that sleep was way more important to my well-being and my husband's well-being if we brought the baby in our room. There are ways to attach a crib to your bed so the baby isn't in your bed.

Just some suggestions. Hope this helps.

My 18 month old still wakes up to nurse so I'm no help, but I guess I don't think it's a big deal.

I would talk to the neighbors and explain the situation to them. Your little one is waking up a few times each night and won't go back to sleep without nursing. Ask them for patience and understanding.
Does she have a music box or CD? Quite often if you play their sleepy time music they will go back to sleep. If you haven't started that yet give it a try. Find some restful music, classical music works very well and play it for her as she goes to sleep then if she wakes during the night play her music for her. In a few days her mind will come to reconize the music as a signal to sleep.
Remember take care of yourself, if you are healthy and well rested you are a better parent. Can your hubby get up with her?
Good luck depression is no fun so take care of yourself and do what you need to do so you can care for your family. But you can't really care for them if you are not feeling well.

Could your DD use earplugs for a few nights while you sleep train? I recommend the Baby Wise method, which worked great for us with 2 kids. It's a pain to cry it out the first couple nights, but you get through it and then you're done and everyone gets better rest... which is necessary for your health and sanity!

Several people on here have suggested co-sleeping as a solution when she wakes up. I do not recommend it! I have had several friends who did that when their kids had the same problem as yours and it led to years of issues. The most extreme case is one friend who's daughter is in first grade now and will still wake up and climb into mom and dad's bed EVERY night! It has gotten to the point that this week they have begun to barricade their door, from the inside, (they don't have a lock) so that she can't get in! They have decided that she can cry it out in the hall until she decides to go back to bed (hopefully!). They tried putting her back in her bed when they woke up in the night and found her in their bed, but she would just wake up again later and climb right back in bed with them. She learned very early on that if she goes to Dad's side of the bed, he won't wake up as she climbs over him! My friend says all this started when she was just over a year old and she would wake up at night and they would bring her in bed with them so they could all get some sleep. I'm sorry I don't have many ideas on what TO do, but I would strongly suggest that co-sleeping is something NOT TO do!

I am going to give an unpopular advise but here it goes. One..stop nursing. By 2 years of age they should be able to drink from a sippy cup. If you still want her to have breat milk.. I would pump and give it to her in a sippy cup. Most physicians say at this age they still need milk in any form to keep them healthy, such as 1 or 2 percent milk. Another reason a child will wake up in the night time is that they are hungry. I would give my children Rice cereal just before bedtime and that way they are full and the cereal will stick with them until breakfast. You didn't mention if you give your child other foods besides break milk, if you don't I would strongly encourage you to do so. Have a talk with your pediatrician or nurse as to what to start with. It has been too many years since mine were that little. But my darling Daughter in Law gave it a try when she was going thru the same thing as you and is now sleeps thru the night. And also gives her food during the day to keep her happy through out the day and now only takes 1 long nap a day. Her pediatrition said whatever you are doing keep at it she is doing very well. Sometimes the old fashioned ways still work in this day and age

Maureen,

Many people will disagree with me but my boys (and now my 10 month old daughter) did the exact same thing and IMO the easiest thing for everyone is to nurse them quickly and go back to bed.

For me, if I nurse it is painless and quick to get them back to bed. Otherwise, it takes an hour and then they wake up in 45 minutes or an hour again anyway and we have to start all over.

I am all for working with your children on sleeping through the night, but for me, I wait until they are older and then work on it when they understand what you are saying.

If you are tired, and stay home, you should lay down with your daughter and take a nap when she does. I know it's hard to loose that time to get things done, but if you are worried about your health, it's the best thing you can do.

Good luck,

Jessica

Hi MB-
I have a 5yo and a 15 mos old. With both kids I have always kept them up a little later and we have supper at around 7:00 or 7:30 and then baths at 8:30 and then bed at 9:00. Unless they fall asleep on their own, of course. When we do eat earlier, they both fall asleep earlier and then wake up earlier. And if this happens my youngest is restless all night. With mine, if they have full tummies before bed then they sleep longer - which is a good thing! Also, my house is old & noisy too - not with just house noises but with dogs and the TV so - I have a musical stuffed animal that plays for 5 minutes that I turn on when I first lay my youngest down to help him relax and drown out other noises. I've heard thru the monitor that he will turn it on by himself sometimes (you just have to squeeze it) when he wakes up at night. I hope this helps for you!
J.