Hellp with Toddler Bedtime Pee Pee Poo Poo Drama

Updated on May 17, 2011
M.S. asks from Boston, MA
5 answers

We have a new problem in the house lately, and It's a game that my 2,5 has started to do this week. Before bed we go pee, and off to sleep she went. Now it has turned into I have to go pee and poo poo over and over and over. I did break down a few times just in case she did have to go. but now its a game. She screams, cries and wines until we come in and get her. One time I ignored her and she pooped . I felt terrible, and dont want it to happen again. last nght I sat in the bathroom for 20 min and no poo poo. I think she is just delaying bedtime with this little trick. Tonoght I went in 3 times sat her on the potty and nothing. So I took her back to bed and she has been whining. Bedtime is 7 pm It is now 8:30!!! Last night it lasted until 9:30. I NEED ADVICE!!

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So What Happened?

I will try to start bedtime earlier,I forgot to mention she is still in her crib. Thanks for the advice.

More Answers

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

If your intuition is telling you that this is a delaying tactic, then treat it as such. If she 'needs to go potty', put her in the bathroom and then leave. (make sure you've child-proofed, of course). By leaving, she gets no attention, which is a great motivator for this sort of 'game'.

So, imagine tomorrow evening. "Mama, I have to poop!" You go in, cool as a cucumber. "Go potty then." you tell her. Take her to the bathroom calmly, then tell her "Call me when you are done" and go somewhere else. If it were me, I'd be somewhere out of sight with a book, just to keep an ear out. The point of this is no special attention. Make it BORING for her.

Check in on her after 5 or 10 minutes. "All done?" No more words. Either help her wipe, or leave again.

If she's playing around, tell her "all done", calmly of course, and take her back to bed. No re-tucking in, no kisses, because you've already done that.

Nighttime potty gets NO extra attention. If she poops, be low-key and just get her changed, then put her back to bed. No cuddles, no snuggling.

As for the whining, here's the thing: we all know when they are whining and when they are *truly hurt*, upset. Whining-- I tend to ignore it. She knows she's supposed to be in bed. These techniques will help her to understand that YOU understand what she's supposed to be doing, and you are not going to come get her because she hollers. Most kids would just hop out and go use the toilet themselves if there was an urgent need. She might occasionally have accidents at night, many kids do. She won't regress if this happens a few times. However, she might start either helping herself, or staying in bed when it's bedtime. If you keep going in... well, then, she's going to think she has YOU trained!

Good luck, be consistent, neutral emotion, and don't lose your cool. Just be as solid as the earth and take her back to bed.

4 moms found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Boston on

I would probably allow my kids to go back to the bathroom ONCE, but that's it. I've also threatened to take a stuffed animal or favorite blankie away for the night if they don't produce anything. (Usually they can produce a drop or two, under that much pressure! But it gets the point across that you're not going to tolerate lying.) I'm sure this will pass as quickly as it began... good luck!

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D.L.

answers from Boston on

My daughter has a potty in her room in case she needs it. She only uses it at night. It sounds like your daughter is looking for attention. If you put one in her room she has one if she really needs to go. Once she realizes that you won't be involved in the pee/poo process, at night, she may lose interest in the game. Just a suggestion.
Just remember, while this time may be annoying as anything, it will pass shortly.

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

When our daughter tried this we just moved the bedtime routine up an hour. She played in the potty, but was ready for bed at her normal time. Since we didn't make a big deal, it was a short lived phase that didn't last too terribly long.

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J.S.

answers from Boston on

We had this same thing happen. Our daughter was still in the crib as well. We did what Hazel suggested and kept her minimally engaged/stimulated during the night time pottying. It did eventually get better, although I have to say her bedtime drifted later anyway and right now she's still in there talking instead of sleeping! I never felt comfortable ignoring her, nor would I threaten her (as another post suggested) with anything to do with pottying as I do not want to mess with that.

Good luck.

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