Hi Denise,
I let my kids do breakfast. We do breakfast burritos a lot. They can microwave an egg for 1 minute (after breaking the yoke) and then add a little cheese and then wrap it in a tortila. If I want clean up to go a little easier, I spray the bowl with cooking spray so the egg doesn't stick. I have let my 9 year old do this since she was 7. Especially because I had surgery and couldn't do it myself.
Also, I always make extra pancakes and waffles so that they can heat them in the microwave themselves. (My 6 year old does this now.)
As for lunch, I usually let them choose what I put in their lunches from the food I already have. Being a SAHM things are a little tight so we do not have a lot of packaged treats.
Lastly, we play cooking show. Using only one child per meal, we play cooking show where they tell me the ingredients reading off the recipe and then I get them and they put them in the bowl or the pan. This works for almost everything but the oven. I won't let them take things out yet.
Because they know they get to take turns, I do not have many arguments and they feel like they cooked the meal. And there are days when I am too stressed and no one gets a turn that day. (Also, their attention spans are short when they realize that cooking is sometimes a chore.)
D.