"Do You Have Small Children?"

If it were me I would have had fun with the interviewer - since you aren't going to get the job anyway.
Do you have small children? Why no, in fact they are quite large!
Do you have childcare? No, I like to bring my children to work with me! I think they'd love it here!

It is definitely illegal. They can easily be sued by someone who feels they were not hired due to their answers regarding those questions. They've probably had (reasonable) experience with parents that need time off when kids are sick etc... and they are trying to avoid hiring someone that has commitments of a family. But it is discriminatory.

I wouldn't want to work there. If they are this far behind on things like this, who knows what else they are behind on.

Wow - Momof4 got a little nasty there.

It doesn't matter what the employer WANTS to know. It matters what the employer is ALLOWED to know. How dare anyone assume that someone with small children is less reliable than someone with a million other issues.

You were right about marital status and year of birth. The employer might want to know if you are 35, a Republican, a Methodist, an Italian, and someone with a cholesterol level below 200, but it's not his business.

So, is your question "What should I have said?" - I might have paused long enough to make the interviewer a little uncomfortable. Usually people fill the silence. My next question (if I'd had the presence of mind) might have been, "I'm sorry. What is it that you are asking exactly?" Get them to elaborate and maybe think about it. Then you could have said, "I don't understand why you need to know that. Is that a qualification for the job?" Then add, "If you are asking if there's any reason I can't be at work regularly and on time, the answer is no."

If you can get a copy of the application, send it to your state's office against discrimination. The doctor's office needs to update its applications to comply with current laws - and they can easily get boiler plate applications from any state employment agency or half the office supply stores in the area, and on line.

The questions they ask you have to be relevant. For example, they can't ask you your age, but they can ask, say, in a bar or restaurant where you would be serving alcohol, "Are you over the age of 21?" BECAUSE IT'S RELEVANT and the LAW. I'm not sure, but that might apply in a doctor's office if there are medications you would be dealing with - but again, you'd have to check on that. They can ask if you have a valid driver's license if the job requires driving.

If you're going to be working there, you'd best report this because if YOU are asked to have anyone fill out the application, you don't want to be particpating in this!

Hey Momof4, do you think they would ask a man that question? That's why she needs the shower.

I probably would have asked him if he was married also with a wink. Not a very orofessional interview ...lol

I applied at a Friendly's Resturant, they serve food and Ice cream, I could not shut off my mouth. They asked me if I had experience scooping. I said 'yes, I went to scooping school for about a year".with a straight face. They wanted ALL my working experience from when I first starting working....ok I was 50 at the time of the inteview and I just looked at this man and asked why would he need this. First off, I cannot remember, second it's crazy to ask this for a waitress job. I did fill out most of the paper with my recent jobs. I had an attitude with him .....I asked him more questions than he could ask me.
Needless to say I did not get the job.....lol

i am of two minds of this. first, devil's advocate - it DOES matter, and a mom to a young child, unfortunately, and unfairly, but in all honesty, 99% of the time - IS a different employee than a person with no children. and usually not for the better, FROM A BUSINESS STANDPOINT. that's fact, not opinion. sorry. someone who has never been responsible for a department may not know that, but it is the truth. so i get where they were coming from. (as a supervisor myself, and a mother, honestly, i would rather have a hardworking mother who does her very best - may have a couple more days off here or there, sure, BUT very often they are much more motivated than a single/unattached person, to do well)

HOWEVER.

it was unprofessional, illegal, and morally WRONG to ask it. and you didn't have to answer. if you got a bad vibe from them and their manner in approaching you was icky, absolutely, run and run fast. sounds like they are out of touch at the very least. probably they didn't mean any harm. maybe if it was a small office, they're used to being up in everyone's business, and didn't think anything of it. (the feeling sooo dirty that a shower can't get it off seems a little over the top, but that's just my perspective, i wasn't there. maybe it just struck a nerve for you or something. but having a child is not something to EVER feel "dirty" about. no one can make you feel bad about yourself, without your permission.)

bottom line, they WERE wrong, and you had every right to leave and not look back. good luck in your search.

Wow! Unbelievable that in 2012 these types of questions are even asked? Since it seems from your post, you were not hired by the doctor, but an assitant of his/hers, you should inform him in writing of your experience. If the questions were approved by her she should be called out on it in a tongue in cheek manner, " I'm sure you understand what a liability this can create for you, and certainly you didn't approve these questions, as they are not legal under equal employment rights?" If she doesn't know, it's likely h you use this tone, she will get the message and stop or discipline his interviewer.

It is illegal to ask that during the interview. The best thing to do is to try and answer the question they are trying to get at "If you wondering if I am able to commit to all job responsibilities, I am".

Don't know why you feel all dirty, he was prob. just clueless.

You're right - the questions about your marital status and whether you have children are illegal. They should not have asked, but they did. It's hard to prove and prosecute this type of discrimination. Instead of being angry for long, think about what you've just learned about this doctor's office based on the questions you were asked. If you are offered the job, consider carefully - the interview is a two-way process. It is also your chance to learn something about your prospective employer. The question about kids could be an innocent mistake, an attempt to make conversation by an interviewer who does not know better. The follow-up question about child care tells you that it wasn't a mistake. So ask yourself - do you want to work for these people, given what you've learned about their character?

Have you thought about what you are going to do if they offer you the job? In your shoes, unless this job was the only option available to me and I needed it to keep my family above water, I'd politely decline and keep looking. No need to explain - "I'm sorry, my situation has changed, and I will not be able to accept a job with you at this time. Thanks for your kind consideration." I wouldn't want to spend every work day around people whose first impression left me wanting a shower.

It's descriminatory. I might be more forgiving if it were a clueless older doc. But if they gave you a bad feeling and you wouldn't want to work there anyway, it might be worth letting their HR know that their practices could get them in trouble.

I currently work for a company where the manager is a dad. He has a different attitude because of that. If your lucky, you can find a place where they are professional and human.

I think youd be better off FAR away from that office!

Hmmm...they might "want to know", Gina, but its ILLEGAL to ask those things during an interview. It's protecting our liberty & freedoms!

I was applying for a teaching job in a community college in Japan, and the application asked for my measurements! That question floored me!

I like the posts that recommend to play with the interviewer. I wouldn't have thought of that, but later I would have wanted to have done that.

One good comeback could have been something like, "Does everyone in my family get free medical care with you?"

Clearly, this has been an issue for them in the past. They train someone, but that someone must call in frequently because of child care issues.

Another good comeback could have been, "This job comes with fully paid child care at the location of my choice, right?"

I am finding that employers want people to just work and never have personal lives--that way a worker can be asked to do things beyond what should be asked of anyone to do.

Imagine you got the job. Imagine what the good doc would have asked you to do on the job that would have been unethical, immoral or illegal. Then thank your lucky stars you survived another day to find a better position.

Under the law, they cannot ask you that. My understanding that it is illegal in every state. And there is a reason for that. It is discrimination. If you get asked this question again, I would ask them, "How does that apply to the job" or "Whether I do or not, what does that have to do with the job I am applying for?"
BTW, you can file a complaint with the State's labor commission. It's an avenue to explore. The state may take them to court for you.

Yes, it is illegal to ask. I would report them. They cannot ask questions about childcare, even though they want a dependable employee. Definitely report them. I know you need the job, but if I was asked that during an interview, I'd point out that I know it is illegal to ask that question.

Regaurdless of what the employer wanted to know it is ILLEGAL to ask many of those questions - age, marital status, family.

one site states....
Family/marital status:
"Are you married?" Here's a question that seems reasonable, but it is an illegal job interview question. Keep all questions focused on job responsibilities. You can ask about how flexible he is with his schedule or whether she would be able to come in at the last minute during an emergency. But you cannot ask if the candidate is married, has children or is a caregiver. In addition, do not ask women if they plan on having children.

What to Do if Asked Illegal Job Interview Questions
When someone asks an illegal job interview question, it is usually an innocent mistake. The hiring manager may just forget and treat the interview as a conversation, especially if they are new at interviewing or haven't done it in some time. When asked an illegal question and if the question does not seem offensive, you can simply answer it. You may also ask how the question relates to the job or point out that it is illegal and refuse to answer. If the question is offensive, you can terminate the interview. If you feel as though the questions were blatantly illegal, you may want to contact your local labor relations organization.

Read more: Employment Interview Laws | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_###-###-####_employment-intervi...

good luck in your job hunt

Any question asked during a job interview that isn't relevant to the job responsibilities is unethical and potentially illegal. Any question about marital status or children falls on the illegal side. This information allows hiring decisions to be biased and discriminatory.

Also, questions relating to - race, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, age (I'm sure I'm missing some) are illegal.

By law, they aren't allowed to ask you, but I actually agree with Momof4, that, as an employer I would want to know. It would make a difference to me when I was calculating how much it was going to cost me to hire Applicant A versus Applicant B. It makes a difference when calculating the cost of benefits, on back-up coverage, etc. As a SMALL biz owner, I think they should be allowed to ask such. However, large companies shouldn't be able to ask, since they can handle those types of fluxuations easier.

It's illegal and if you come across that again, I like the response of "I assure you I am able to fulfill the responsibilities of this job."

Funny that working with all women was offered as a benefit. If it were me, I'd be thinking, "shoot me now." I am not a fan of single-sex offices and would rather not get along with a male coworker than a female one.

I didn't read the other answers....I'm not one to cry discrimination. Is it illegal to ask...sure! Would it have helped you looked completely stable and had your childcare covered? Absolutely. I volunteer up that stuff, there is too much competition these days, I want to appear to me the most stable applicant.

I want my employees to show up, stuff happens I get it but I don't want to be some temporary spot. We are here for careers.

**I just think it is best to be open and honest to see if it is a fit for me and them. I have never been embarassed that I had a daughter, most of times I had back up, sometimes I did not but I worked for amazing companies that said "go, be with her". I have always been just more than a clock puncher!

**Well, would having a child prevent you from doing your job as expected?? Do you have child care and back up. I work calling on physicians every day and most of them have children. You need to turn it to a positive instead they are being illegal. If you are a certain age range they are going to assume...would you rather just pass on you because of your age??

**I say speak up and tell them your situation, that you have it convered. Can you imagine this of everyone of bhild bearing age??? Set them straight that you are fine and let the other one still have questions about them

It is illegal...but since I moved and needed another job I was always very forthcoming about it. Why? Because my family comes first and I don't want to work anywhere when that is not ok. I am a mom to 4 kids....I will have to call in when one is sick. I asked for part time (Wednesdays) off so I can schedule doctors appt or get mom things done.

They will find out before or after.....and it's just easier for everyone before. If they don't want to hire you because you have other priorities....you shouldn't want to work there.

People who "would want to know" this are the reason that the laws are in effect, if they are letting this drive their decisions to hire.

And when I owned a fully licensed child care center with over 60 kids enrolled I am "sure" that I went to school and learned what and what I could not ask in an interview.

I also "did not" learn what I could or could not tell someone calling for a reference on a past employee. I learned from a friend how to say something without saying anything. Like if someone said "Hi, I have an applicant for a job that put your company down as a past job reference. What can you tell me about them". I could say "Oh......"I" remember "her". Yes, she "worked" here. If you heard me emphasis the words Her and worked you might get the idea that I remember her because she was lazy and didn't do anything that might be called work. So there are many ways to take care of the work of hiring and giving reference to past employees.

There was always a lot of hearsay about stuff and no one really knows what is legal or illegal. You have to understand that people are "HUMAN" and a lot of them have no idea they can or cannot ask a person some stuff.

To me it seems reasonable to ask a person applying for a job in a child care setting if they have children and if they have child care because if they didn't they could bring their kids and get a discount. If I need to make room for a new employees kids I would certainly need to know. SO to me that is a valid and needed question and has nothing to do with whether they have a CDA or any actual experience in a classroom setting and teaching young kids.

You might tell this doc's office manager that you were asked this question during the interview and although you're not interested in filing charges against them they should have an in-service about the laws so that anyone can "know" what the law says. They could even have someone come from the state labor board that could teach them how to interview a prospective employee.