Difficult Decision to Make.

A man was caught in a flood. He floated in the water clinging to debris as a rescue boat came by.
"Get in the boat," the rescuer shouted to him.
"No," the man said. "God will provide."
A second boat came. Again, the man declined.
A third boat came. And again, the man declined, citing that God would rescue him.
Eventually the man succumbed to his exhaustion and drown. Upon arriving in Heaven, he demanded of God, "Why did you not rescue me?"
"What in the world did you want?" God replied. "I sent you three boats!"

Take the job.

in my experience the gods don't 'test' that way, ie right and wrong answers. being gods, they tend to be more nuanced than that.
maybe it's just mine. i would find it difficult to worship a gotcha-god.
and fear-based reactions rarely work out well.
i'd take advantage of this amazing opportunity. i very, very rarely regret things i've done. it's the opportunities passed up that tend to engender sighs. yes, you'll create new challenges by leaving somewhere you love, but fortunately it's easy to stay in touch these days.
if it were strictly money it might be easier, but that's not what it's all about. it sounds like a big career boost, AND the chance to experience something you haven't been able to before. i'm not a city gal by any means, but that doesn't mean i don't appreciate what cities have to offer.
i'd jump on it.
khairete
S.

As long as all 7 of you are together, you can be happy anywhere.

This is a great opportunity for your husband. Men that are the bread winners, carry a great amount of stress and worry about how they will be able to care for their families. This is one huge burden that could be lifted from him.

With 5 children.. the financial security for the future and opportunities that would be available for your family, could be very exciting. Not to mention the good you all could do for others less fortunate with your larger donations. .

Just my thoughts. God is not in the job or the town, or even in troubles or successes. He is in you, your family, and everyone you build connections with. He loves us all, town and city. I would think that God would smile on whatever decision you make, knowing that you will be loving folk anyways.

I think your family would benefit from the move. God will be with you anywhere. He always is. As you reach out to more experiences and more people you are expanding your contact with all that God has created. All my best.

Aren't there Christians (and generally good people) everywhere?

You go where the jobs are.
God helps those who help themselves, right?
If you can feel so connected to your current community in 5 years time you can feel just as connected in your next community.
This will be a wonderful adventure if you are open to it.
Embrace it and believe that God has blessed you - He has!

It sounds to me like you need to visit Littleton before you make any major decisions. Littleton is not a big city. Gather lots of information before you make a major decision.

You can find good people wherever you go. Just because a city is a bit larger and out of your comfort zone does not mean you should forgo an opportunity.

Think of the potential GOOD opportunities for your children as far as education, more opportunities for work, volunteering, etc. College opportunities.

I was raised in a very rural town of less than 3000 and very sheltered. My goal was to get out of that state and town as fast as I could because I hated being so sheltered in a place that was not as pure as everyone believed. There were issues in that town and a lot of it was swept under the rug but they made big news when it came out that some church leaders (not Catholic) were pedophiles and had been abusing boys and girls for years.

SO, there are bad and good people everywhere. I would not restrict myself from an opportunity out of fear.

On another point, you mention bonuses.. Keep in mind that a bonus is not a given. DO NOT count any bonus in any of the financials as you consider this move. Companies cut and re-evaluate bonuses often. A lot of people will take a job based on a bonus and end up in financial trouble.

If you look at the financial situation without the bonus, you can also see how you manage 5 college educations and your retirement plans. You have a lot to think about that is not just money related.

I don't see this as a test from God and I just can't understand why you are so scared about this decision that you didn't enjoy your holiday. It sounds to me that you are very set in your ways and just don't want any change but change can be good. You may get to Littleton and realize how much you have been missing because of fear to make change.

I hope you do not instill or project your fears to your children. Your children deserve a chance to grow and experience without living in fear.

God gave your family a gift and with that gift you could get out of debt and then help others in need, when your debts are paid. If this does happen to be a test, the only way you would fail is if you turned away from God by choosing to move. You are not turning away from God. He will be coming with you!

Welcome to mamapedia!!

God answered your prayers, it's up to you whether or not you want to believe He answered them.

While money isn't everything? Right now it would help you and your family. Would his current company consider giving him a raise?

God delivers. He can't force you to do anything. Is God testing you? I don't know. He might have opened doors for you and your friend is the Devil telling you it's a test.

Go visit. Drop in on a church that is of a similar denomination to yours. Talk to the leadership. Check out the schools. Make a decision based on facts, not fear. Two of our friends (well them and their families) made big moves in the last year and while the moves were not without challenges, they are thriving in their new communities. If you are the type to worry, you can worry yourself to a standstill without resolving anything. Really sit down and make a pro/con list. Maybe rent the house for a year instead of selling, so you can return if you need to.

I've made some big moves, way bigger than 200 miles. I had no choice, and I did find my footing and my "home" in the new location. Remember, 260 miles is a haul, but it's not an impossible drive to visit. I told my DD (about our friends' moves) that people don't' stop being your friend when they move. They may not be nearby, but we have phones and emails.

If you worry about influences...just my experience, but there's nothing I or my children have experienced here that I didn't also experience back in my small hometown.

Littleton is a nice area (a suburb of Denver) and IMO you would probably be able to find some kind of fellowship and feeling of home there. More rural areas are not that far away so you could try to settle in to a smaller community and ask if your husband could commute to Littleton as well. Have you visited the area? if not, I would start there and see what kind of feeling you have from there.

I completely understand not wanting to uproot your family, and all the stress over weighing pros and cons of moving. One of the good things about moving is that it will give your children more breadth of life experience and M. bring you closer together as a family because you will depend on each other more during the move. You also mentioned he will have a job with the same company, and you M. find like-minded families working there as well.

I also understand the hope that prayer will bring some type of epiphany, but I would also be reasonable and logical with your life circumstances (God helps those who help themselves). Is money so tight that you are having trouble making ends meet? Is there no other option you see in the future other than a job change or move to alleviate the financial issues? If so, it seems pretty clear the decision you need to make, and your prayers M. be better directed towards finding peace with that decision.

Good luck!

Lots of good advice here. I'll just add a couple things. I think this is an opportunity too good to pass up. It is being offered to your husband and it seems to me he should take it and run!

Littleton is a suburb of Denver and there are so many opportunities there and great things to do just miles away. There are also great churches and wonderful people. My cousins grew up there and one still lives there to this day. I spent a lot of time there when I was little. And growing up in a small town, I was always jealous of what my cousins had there. So many things to do! So much fun! So many people to meet and learn from.

If you do move, the likelihood that your kids will stay nearby as they grow and become adults is much greater. Small town kids tend to leave to find opportunities. If you are already in a place where they can do just about anything they want, you are more likely to remain close when they marry, have kids and start their own lives.

I say "go for it!"

Go where the money is. It will take time, but you will build a new community. Once you find a church you like, you will have your community. Enduring and conquering the change will also make all of you stronger, more competent individuals.

You can do it.

Don't worry, you can take your faith and your beliefs with you! And, bringing those things to a new community may be exactly what God has in mind for you.

Littleton is a nice community/city but it is far from a small town. Littleton is a suburb of Denver meaning all of the suburbs and Denver merge together to form one entity.
Littleton is NOT a small town but it is a nice area.
We attend church in Littleton and my son attends preschool at that church. As previous posters have said, 'there is a church, religion, and faith' everywhere.'
Littleton is an extension of Denver and not to far off from the city.

With that being said, I can't imagine a better 'suburb' then Littleton. It is an all around nice place and and as far as 'suburbs' go it is good.

Pray to God and do what is best for your family. Littleton has good schools and is a decent environment

I can't say I'd consider Littleton, CO a "city". There are areas that felt very, very rural to me. It's nice there...and if you DO want a true city, Denver is close by. We lived in Denver for 12 years. It's a nice place and a nice life. But you can easily get out and live in more remote areas if you choose to.

You'll have your faith and your family (the most important things), you'll have stable finances and job security (also VERY important) and you'll FIND your new community. Building a life somewhere takes time, but it WILL happen.

For what it's worth, *I* think you should move. If it were our family with this decision, I'd push for the move. But it's your family and you need to do what's best for you. It IS a difficult decision, but trust that in the end, you'll make the right one.

Why is it so hard to believe that this is a gift from God? I realize you are scared to leave where you are comfortable but this is an amazing opportunity. Just thank God and GO!!

My father always told me 'grow where you are planted' which means no matter where you find yourself you need to figure out how to make it work. I think your husband has been given a great opportunity which will bring your family into a different community where you will find a new church support group and great new christian schools. Maybe its God telling you that your strength is needed in another community?

I think your trusted friend is just steering you to stay because he/she is afraid that you might lose touch when you move.

I say go for it. It'sa huge oopportunity for your husband within the company he loves. It would erase a lot of burden for your family.. an idea would be if he has to be out there asap would be for him to go and find a new home first while you and the kids stay bbehind and finish out the school year and get your current home packed up and ready to sell. This way he starts to get acclimated with his new position and you already have a home ready for the kids to help make the transition easier

I always make these hard decisions by weighing the odds.

For us, I wanted my husband home more often because he wasn't making as much money as previous years in his current job. It was a pay cut, but meant he could be home and wouldn't be too tired and burned out to enjoy his family.

With the pay cut, came quite a few no's when we wanted things, but we have learned to live a little more simple. I don't pay things off as quickly as I used to do so, but I still keep everything up.

If things get too bad, I will ask him to go back to his old job and I am sure he will find a place to go to work.

I work also, and soon will apply for a better paying job, which will eventually make a nice difference in our combined income.

So far, having him home means more than the material things in life. Today was the friday after thanksgiving, family day. I had the day off and he worked from the kitchen table. By the afternoon, we all hopped in the car and went to his office for about 20 minutes, while he did a few things, then went to a few stores. Had he been at his previous job, we would have sat there for 2 hours as he would stop by and tell us it will only be another minute.

Put it all out on the table and sort it out. Make the best decision for you and your family.

No one can answer this for you, as you know. But do think on this: the question isn't necessarily money or fellowship. You don't really know what would be for you in Littleton. There could be a wonderful fellowship or not. You are putting the test upon yourselves simply by putting it in this context. You don't know that the job could bring certain problems, money or something else. I say money because you don't know whether the job will be lasting or if something happens that causes money difficulties. Maybe there is another way to make more money where you are. There are so many things you don't really know about the future whether you stay or go.

You don't have your answer from your prayer because fear is in the way. Fear always clouds and deafens. So fear must be dealt with, cleared away. If you cannot let it go, pray to have it lifted and taken from you both so that you may see and know. Ask that a light be given to guide you. You must be willing to accept your answer when you receive it, but you won't truly, clearly receive it if fear stands in your way. You won't receive the Knowing if you fear the answer. You don't want to hear the answer because you know that common sense and short sightedness would say to move where the money takes you.

No one wants to leave what is comfortable. But again, you don't know where you're suppose to be. So if you intend to truly be guided and directed by God you must be willing to follow with purpose and strength. Remember God's Way is not our way and our way is not God's Way. So what does this mean? We plan and try to direct our lives in the way we see fit -- with common sense and reason. But God's Way and reason and sense often looks much different than ours. Most people cannot even begin to recognize it. Also remember that whatever we believe in and say we live by, will be tested. In your case it's with family/church/financial. Our test is always centered around what means the most to us or it's not a test.

So please allow yourself to breathe. You've prayed now let go for now and center your thoughts and doing on something else for a while and then come back to it. Remember God knows already everything and what your future is. God lives within you. This is more about actually knowing God than anything else and doing as directed in clarity at least enough clarity to see the light within and in front of you to guide your next step. Knowing this so well that it lights you with Divine Love and sets you afire with love and service.

In prayer for you and your husband.

I think that you need to move forward. This is the same company right? Littleton isn't the big city Mom, it's a small town, not a tiny town but it's not a big city like Denver or Colorado Springs. It's not even in the top 10 nor is it in the top 20. It's #21. I also realize it's right there in an area of towns that surround Denver. Try seeing what's available south of it. In a smaller population area.

I do realize there is a whole page of towns in Colorado with less than 1000 residents too though. SO I can imagine 40K people seems like a lot but it's not, not when compared to OKC or Dallas or someplace really big.

I think it's nice to wait on God and listen to what he's saying but there does come a time when it's up to you to make the decision.

What about taking a few days and drive there. Check out the living situations, how much housing costs, what sort of private schools are there, will you be able to live in a home that is comparable to the one you have now or better, does your denomination have a branch or congregation there, will he travel at all with the new job, what differences will the new job make in your home life, will he work more hours or have a more physical job, and things like this.

I think you should go spend some time in this new place to see what it's like. To see if you can find something in the suburbs.

This is an amazing opportunity for your husband and family. It's an
Opportunity to meet new people for all. Littleton is not a "big" city. You will find a new church, become involved and a year from now you will wonder why you were concerned. So I saying jump at the opportunity!

Is there any way that you can pick up a second job, or side income, where you are? In other words, perhaps there is an option "C"? Are you looking at this from every possible angle?

I would keep thinking and most of all praying about it.

Don't let fear hold you back from making a decision that can only help your family. If you have prayed about it and don't feel anything one way or another then go for it! It may be that God is asking you to trust Him. It's okay to be scared, but don't let fear keep you in a bubble

Your question asking if money or fellowship was more important stood out to me. You will find fellowship anywhere you go. I believe God will be with you wherever you go. The money will benefit your family, but moving because it will benefit you doesn't mean that money is the most important thing to you........it means your family is important to you!

Littleton is wonderful! My husband and I would love to live in that area of Colorado. :)

Start your research. Do Google searches on everything -- schools, housing, churches, grocery stores, library, activities for children/adults, hobby and crafts. Visit the area to get a feel of what it is like before you make a decision. Then when you do make a decision you will have better knowledge.

Just because you "love" where you are does not mean your children will love it in the years to come. Will your children be in a position to go to good schools or colleges because of their schooling in a small or rural area? Will they be able to compete in the world for jobs? Will you be able to fund your retirement? These are questions that you must be able to answer.

The only constant in life is change. You should accept that change comes in many forms and it may be that this job is the change that your family needs. Money is not everything but it sure helps to solve problems at home.

You and hubby needs to sit down and do a pro/con list of the job offer and see where it leads you. Be open and not closed minded to this offer and any other that comes up.

Talk to your church family they might know of a church in the Littleton area that is a good fit or a start for your family. Once you get to Littleton you would church shop and find a church that suits your needs.

Hey, if military families can do this on a daily basis so can you. They get a notice that is 3 to 6 months they are leaving and they leave and make new friends. Sometimes it is hard but it is part of the job and you go. You keep in contact with people through email and Skype and visits.

Good luck to you.

the other S.

PS Fear is no reason to make a change. The unknown is always going to be the unknown.

Think of the opportunities you will give your children if they are in a larger city. I grew up in a fairly small community and now am raising my kids in a larger city. We have the best of both worlds by finding a suburb that allows quick access to the city, but has a small town feel. We can attend operas, ballets, symphony events, ball games and more. There are several universities close to us, museums, and tons of galleries. Things were very limited for me as a kid and I'm happy I'm providing my children a wider range of cultural, academic and entertainment options. As far as your support system and community... Good people attract great friends. You will make new friends and you will be able to establish new ties to the church community and to the schools.

http://www.girlfriendsingod.com/2014/shattered-matters/

I wonder if reading this will help you process your concerns. We are called to fellowship wherever we are planted, right? I never thought as Littleton as big, maybe you should visit there. Does anyone in your church family or network know people there?